[Excerpt from TT (Private Session): 2004-10-25]
[HeidiH] I’m confused about my current relationship with my boyfriend known as “Gary.” Do we have any agreements or karmic ties and what path would be the most beneficial to each of us?
[MEntity] You are only confused because that is a way to avoid making a choice. You are waiting for a choice to be made for you, instead of by you. Confusion is a means of delaying participation in an event because you either do not like the options available, or you believe other options will eventually reveal themselves.
You share a Mate Agreement with the fragment known as “Gary”, but you do not share external Karma. You do, however, both help in supporting each other’s Self-Karma, which are issues you have about yourselves that are unresolved. Your Self-Karma will most likely be focused on issues of Acceptance, while his is focused on issues of Reciprocation. Acceptance issues for you will include questions of Trust, Confidence, Strength, and Presence (as discussed previously). These issues are experienced in both directions, meaning that it is about Acceptance of self and others. Reciprocation issues involve the questions of Importance, Equality, Giving, Receiving, and Value. Gary may find that he is processing ideas of importance that were not his original concern in life. In other words, at some point he was questioned as to the importance and meaning of his own personal expression and may have learned to compromise or second-guess himself as a means to add “value” to his expression. This may lead him to question the meaning, value, importance of other people’s level of expressions along with his own. The combination of your issues of Acceptance and his issues of Reciprocity can lead to some profound breakthroughs or breakdowns.
The key to the success of this relationship is in acknowledging openly the issues that exist for you internally. If we are correct in our assessment of this relationship, then admitting that you are terrified of rejection and that you secretly expect to be rejected, and Gary admitting that he is terrified of being found to be meaningless or that he secretly finds most people to be meaningless, will greatly free both of you from unspoken challenges and expectations based on these Self-Karma.