Jump to content
  • Older Soul Sexuality


    From a private session on 10/21/2011


    [MEntity] Hello to you, Diane. We are here. We may respond to your questions now.


    [Diane_H] I had been experiencing a decreased sexual desire for about a year, which brought up a lot of anxiety and worry about my sex life. I finally got around to doing some self healing on the issue (clearing the underlying emotions) recently. After that my heart chakra felt more open again, and the feeling of being "in love" came back to me. Can you comment on what was causing this "blockage"?


    First, this is yet another incarnation, and a rather insidious one at that, of the same self-karmic dance between you, and what you think should be you. Or who you are vs what you or others expect yourself to be. And even more specifically: HOW you are vs how you expect yourself to be.


    That is the first thing to consider: that there is nothing "wrong" here, or even in need of healing, except in terms of your understanding that your sex drive is your own, and not a drive that is necessary to meet the standards of anyone, any society, or even a mate.


    Next, this is a precarious conundrum that many Older souls eventually face: that sex is simply NOT what it is/was cracked up to be, at least in terms of priority and emphasis, especially once love has come into the picture. Sex becomes a PART of the picture, if at all, and not the focus of the picture, if you will.


    In a society that generates conflict in its people through pushes toward sexualizing everything while also making nearly all of that same sexualizing taboo, the pressure for an Older soul in a younger body to somehow exemplify his or her presence through sexual stimulation is intense, to say the least.


    This pressure is fairly easy to navigate when one is not in a relationship, but once one is faced with the pressure of expressing one's love through sexual stimulation, the pressure triggers an Old Soul defiance. That defiance is usually just a means for upholding the integrity of the love, and a passive form of honesty, rather than being something "wrong."


    However, the Older soul will take advantage of this unique situation, especially if mated with a fellow Old soul. By this we mean that the sense of "wrongness" prompts such deep, internal exploration, that it does lead to opportunities for healing that may otherwise have been missed, especially in contexts that relate to shame, body image/consciousness, and internal incongruities.


    The greatest considerations that any Older soul can give to such conflicting feelings about sexual exchanges are:


    ONE) That the Older soul aims for sexual union, rather than sexual stimulation. The difference here is that one is a state of resonance that is profound, and the other is the use of a partner as an extension of masturbation. The Older soul does not need a mate as an extension of pleasuring the self, but chooses a mate as an extension of wholeness.


    When that relationship eventually comes, the vastness of the wholeness can make sex SEEM as if it has lost its presence, but it has not; it has merely become a part of the vastness. In other relationships, it is often the only medium through which "love" is considered valid or expressed.


    A relationship that expands upon one's wholeness is rare, so there is usually no orientation or precedence for it, and it can often feel as if something is wrong, when it is actually "righter" than ever.


    TWO) Sexual stimulation is something the Older soul knows is more easily accessed than nearly anything on the planet. If one is starving, he cannot always find food. If one is thirsting, he cannot always find water. But if one is feeling sexual, even if hungry or thirsty, he can satisfy himself.


    When a relationship comes along that brings with it a wholeness that is rare, and as such is something that not only "you" have desired, but Essence, as well, the emphasis moves toward Agape.


    Sexual stimulation is a means for pleasuring the body, but Sexual union is pleasure for the both the body and Essence, and when this is accepted, turns into a kind of ecstasy. Sexual stimulation is fulfilled through attraction, whereas sexual union is fulfilled through affection. Affection is the most-immediate means through which Agape is fulfilled.


    As an aside: We define Sex as "moving in unison with something other than self."


    With that being said, the Older soul in a healthy relationship tends to discover that sexual stimulation pales in comparison to the affection that has been missing in the life for so long. Once the affection is embraced as the actual focus of the relationship, the sexual attraction and stimulation tends to return, but that time to bask in the affection must be embraced. We say "must be embraced," not as an instruction, but as a part of the equation to returning to a healthy sexual exchange that would be even more satisfying than expected.


    As we said at the beginning, the drop in sexual emphasis is a form of honesty, because when agape and affection is present, it just does not "feel right" to funnel it through the crudeness of simple stimulation.


    [Diane_H] What about when my partner has a stronger sex drive than I do?


    [MEntity] Then it is an opportunity for communication and expression of affection, honesty, intimacy, and not an opportunity for feeling shame, inadequacy, or failure.


    [Diane_H] OK 🙂


    Sex drives will always fluctuate in timing between fragments, but this is part of the dynamic of any level of a relationship, from moods to sex to creativity, to need for private time to socializing, etc.


    The irony in expressing affection, honesty, and intimacy in response to the differences in sex drives at the time is that just allowing yourself and your mate to have that freedom almost always helps lift any inhibitions that were otherwise felt necessary for upholding that same honesty.


    It also helps to keep in mind that your mate is not "wrong" for having a higher drive than your own at the time, but that it is just different at the moment, or altogether. Allowing yourself to own your craving for exchange of affection, honesty, and intimacy can tend to prompt surrender to the needs of a mate in a way that is fulfilling, and not just a compromise or negotiation.


    In other words, in bringing the emphasis of honesty, affection, and intimacy to the forefront for yourself and your relationship, through talk, action, and internal embrace, it tends to automatically free sexual exchange from the defiance that was only there to help steer you toward the emphasis of honesty, affection, and intimacy in the first place.


    The steps to take in your talk, action, and internal embrace might go like this:


    First, discuss the bliss and ecstasy of your shared affection as a very real thing that is new and/or rare to both of you. If that is a valid truth for both of you internally, then sharing this externally brings it to a state of True Validation. This is vital, because if one or both of you do not Truly Validate this, you may eventually second-guess and dismiss even the most beautiful of moments between you.


    [Diane_H] I think we've already done that.


    Second, collapse into a period of time that just ALLOWS THAT TO BE TRUE. By this we mean that both of you express and confirm your attraction to one another, but invite each other to share in basking in this new level of affection that will do nothing to harm your sexual attraction, but in fact, would increase it.


    Basking in the affection means not making each other, or yourself, feel bad for drinking in this pleasure that transcends stimulation. There can be a time frame offered for this, or just the open-ended permission to the self and each other to let yourselves have that new pleasure.


    If there is a time-frame, it could be something like "I just want to bask in this for a week/month without any guilt or shame. My sexual attraction is not gone or compromised, but I just want to really feel this with you because it is so rare and/or new to me/us."


    During that time-frame, indulge often in the pleasure of affection, and by this we mean it in non-physical terms as much as physical terms.


    The joy that is on the other side of the guilt and shame of embracing affection and agape is usually quite profound, and rather invigorating on levels never expected, when the relationship is this healthy.


    THREE ) Let your sexual exchanges take on new meaning. The "internal embrace" of your newfound freedom in affection can quickly and easily translate into sexual exchanges that go far beyond stimulation, but become bonding moments that act as gifts to each other, instead of selfish acts. (By selfish, we mean purely for the self, and not that selfish is a bad thing.)


    Enjoying your sexual exchanges as being just as meaningful as a great conversation, great laugh, or a great hug, or snuggle takes all of the weight off of the exchanges, and moves it into its rightful place in your healthy relationship.


    Keeping all of this in mind, if you find yourself feeling concerned, just remember that your honesty is much more fulfilled through your expression of it than through your suppression of something else (sex) as a way to hold a place for it.




    You may discuss this content within the original post. See Older Soul Sexuality

    • LIKE/LOVE 2
    • THANK YOU! 3
      Report Article


    This is a collaborative project that allows contributions from all members and is continuously growing.


    • contribute transcripts, excerpts, or articles based on your work and study with Michael through Troy
    • to ensure consistency and to avoid copyright issues, please only contribute channeling from Troy
    • please do not submit an analysis, interpretative, or opinion articles; only direct communication with Michael
    • take time to clean up, format, and edited properly so that it is easily readable
    • please format any chat transcripts so that Michael's words are clearly separate from any questions or comments in the transcript
    • please search and scan to see if your submission is already covered or submitted. We wish to keep any redundancy to a minimum


  • Similar Content

    • DanielaS
      By DanielaS
      I've loved Sufjan's music since his 2003 album, Michigan. I grew up in Michigan, too, so immediately felt a resonance with him and loved the lyrics in his beautiful songs. I was SOOO happy and proud to see him at the Academy Awards this year, singing the nominated song, "Mystery of Love," that he wrote for the movie, Call Me By Your Name. Early on he was identified as "Christian" in articles and interviews, but I don't know if that is still true. If so, he's a very evolved Christian. ?
      This song, Casimir Pulaski Day, from the 2005 album, Come On Feel the Illinoise, haunts me and is one I go to when I need a good cry. The lyrics are sublime and I appreciate them on their own as a poem. This song, about budding sexuality, death, and questioning religion, is so so beautiful on so many levels.

      Goldenrod and the 4H stone
      The things I brought you
      When I found out you had cancer of the bone
      Your father cried on the telephone
      And he drove his car into the navy yard
      Just to prove that he was sorry
      In the morning, through the window shade
      When the light pressed up against your shoulder blade
      I could see what you were reading
      All the glory that the Lord has made
      And the complications you could do without
      When I kissed you on the mouth
      Tuesday night at the Bible study
      We lift our hands and pray over your body
      But nothing ever happens
      I remember at Michael's house
      In the living room when you kissed my neck
      And I almost touched your blouse
      In the morning at the top of the stairs
      When your father found out what we did that night
      And you told me you were scared
      All the glory when you ran outside
      With your shirt tucked in and your shoes untied
      And you told me not to follow you
      Sunday night when I cleaned the house
      I find the card where you wrote it out
      With the pictures of you mother
      On the floor at the great divide
      With my shirt tucked in and my shoes untied
      I am crying in the bathroom
      In the morning when you finally go
      And the nurse runs in with her head hung low
      And the cardinal hits the window
      In the morning in the winter shade
      On the 1st of March on the holiday
      I thought I saw you breathing
      All the glory that the Lord has made
      And the complications when I see His face
      In the morning in the window
      All the glory when he took our place
      But he took my shoulders and he shook my face
      And he takes and he takes and he takes
      Songwriters: SUFJAN STEVENS
    • ConnorW (Shazam)
      By ConnorW (Shazam)
      This material was obtained by Connor in a private session in 2017.
      Question: Can you give insight on Kundalini awakenings and how to awaken such energies?
      Kundalini "awakenings" are a process of directing or freeing the Sexual Center, or Higher Moving Center. This is the highest energy immediately accessible to the Personality and Body. It correlates to the second Chakra and is a Higher Energy intentionally set among the Lower Centers.
      This energy awakens when under extreme duress or extreme pleasure.
      When one seeks to direct or free this energy in ways that do not depend upon extremes, then it is only a matter of balancing the Lower Centers.
      When the Lower Centers are balanced, this creates the pathways, or opens the pathways for the Higher Moving energy to move.
      Balance among the Lower Centers simply means that all are used as they are needed, and the habits of the Trap are broken.
      Question: the Trap being certain anxieties?
      For instance, if one is Emotionally Centered, Intellectual Part, it can become a habit to rely entirely upon the emotions and the intellect and to move away from the use of the body or moving energy.
      This moving away from the use of the body can be in literally falling into sedentary states, or more likely that it turns into anxiousness, restlessness, distraction, emphasis on stimulation over true pleasure, etc.
      So the Personality has a feeling, thinks about it and/or expresses it, generates more feeling, more thought, more feeling, more thought, etc. and no action, no moving forward, no direction.
      Or frenetic action, sporadic movement, outbursts, etc.
      So learning to include the body, action, and movement along with feelings, inspiration, thought, and expression is helpful for giving pathways to the Higher Moving Center/Sexual Energy or Kundalini.
      In addition to that balancing, it is important to free your ideas about what sex *should* be.
      Sex is not a performance, but an exploration.
    • KurtisM
      By KurtisM
      [Excerpt from MMW: The Health of Your Moving Center]
      If you think of the Polarities of the Center as the "skin" of the Center where one Pole or the other comes to the surface, and your state of relationship to the Body and your levels of Self-confidence as the blood, then the very deepest core of your Moving Center issues would be your PRIMARY SHAME.
      The bones.
      Where you are in your dance with Shame affect everything "above" that.
      Everyone has access to each Primary Shame, but the Primary Body Type tends to be the key to one's Primary Shame.
      LUNAR - Intelligence - the shame of not being smart enough
      JOVIAL - Indulgences - the shame of giving in to the pleasures of life and the body
      MARTIAL - Demand - the shame of requiring more than what is obvious or offered
      SOLAR - Needs - the shame of needing more than one will admit or ask for
      MERCURIAL - Desperations - the shame of expressing what is important for your healing
      SATURNIAN - Talents - the shame of not being important or unique enough
      VENUSIAN - Appearances - the shame of not looking or being as you are expected, or expect, to look
      Matching your Primary Body Type to your Primary Shame can shed light on some of the deepest wounding that you may carry that alters the quality of function for the Moving Center.
      If you do not find this at the deepest core of you, it means you have worked hard on this and have transformed it, or you are not looking deeply enough.
      If you have worked hard on this, you probably recognize it.
      These are universal obstacles built into the Body Types. They are what might best be understood as unique "pockets" in the Body Type that collect experiences quite specific to that Body Type and there comes a point in the life where that pocket gets heavy, and/or must be sorted through and emptied.
      [Excerpt from Michael Speaks: Advanced Body Types]
      In addition to a Primary Shame, each Body Type has a Primary Joy or Primary Delight.
      This Primary Joy tends to be dynamically tied to the Shame so that if the Joy is blocked or not pursued, the Shame takes over and eventually eclipses all efforts toward Primary Joy. The Body will tend to lock into the Shame as a way to earn or seek Joy, but Shame will always mute Joy.
    • Hjortur
      By Hjortur
      My essence is 35% male and 65% female energy. I notice this in my appreciation for the female form. I do feel reasonably comfortable with my body but the female form feels like the preferred form and the one that I am most comfortable with. 
      Now that I have chosen the male form, I am exploring the areas of manhood. 

      I work with wheel loaders of a well known Swedish brand as a test driver and live out in the forest (occasionally cutting down trees for firewood). I am considered a manly man by most other than me. 
      When it comes to sex, I often use my female lives to guide me and give me inspiration. It is a peculiar feeling to remember being of the other gender in the act of lovemaking. I can remember or feel how it is and what I like in respective body formats. It becomes a yin yang experience, the female and male form combined into one. Being female or male ceases to exist and you are simply human.
      This was at its clearest, when I was with my essence twin (35f65m). One time during lovemaking, we could feel our bodies merge. Afterwards we talked about what it was like and we had had the same experience of being simultaneously male and female.
      What I have noticed is that according to the Michael charts, I have the most satisfying experience with the opposite energy configuration. When I have been with a partner that has the same male female ratio as I, the sex tends to get awkward, uncertain and lack the oneness feeling. My current relationship with a 2.lvl old scholar (she's 70m30f) is very satisfying.
      She also knows that I am not much of a man, really...

  • Recent Articles

  • Create New...