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ABOUT TROY


30 Things About Troy

Here are 30 things about me that I could think of at once. A lot of this is probably already familiar, and  some parts may be TMI! Enjoy! [updated May 13, 2016]

01. I am gay (duh).

02. I am now 100% Vegan.

03. My primary philosophies about life found immediate resonance in the teachings of non-physical Beings who speak through channels.  Those spirits, or Entities, go by the names of “Michael,” “Seth,” “Emmanuel,” “Lazaris,” and “Orin and DaBen.”

04. Despite the amazing love and support I have in my life, one of my best friends ever was my dog, Pluto, who died after only 5 years of friendship from Cancer (he was euthanized in my arms).

05. I have been diagnosed as HIV+ as of 2007 and am now technically “living with AIDS” (I am perfectly healthy, don’t worry). I am now "undetectable," meaning they can't find any evidence of the virus in me.

06. I have a hard time believing that HIV or AIDS exists as we currently understand it because of the lack of science to support the theories, but now I have to live as if it is true, which sucks ass because it feels like I have been recruited into a blind, fanatical religion against my will.

07. I have lived in New York City for over half of my life.

08. Jane Roberts had a profound impact on who I am today as a channel, philosopher, writer, and counselor.

09. I enjoy my time with electronics and non-human animals probably just a little bit more than I do with humans, even though I do love people.

10. I love getting older. I always have. I don't know why.

11. I rarely tell people what I do for a living unless they ask (because my work is kind of hard to explain without immediate baggage to sort through from influences of frauds, tv, movies, etc.).

12. I rarely relate to anyone who does what I do for a living (I am very skeptical, or maybe just very judgmental).

13. My greatest unfulfilled aspiration is to successfully publish a novel and a non-fiction book (I’m working on it!)

14. My greatest fulfilled aspirations are all related to helping people and animals to have and create better lives for themselves.

15. I almost died in 2007 from pneumonia in a hospital in The Netherlands and fell into a coma for several days.

16. Before I almost died, I would "do anything for Love.” After I recovered, I have a peace about Love that changed from constant pursuit to gentle invitation. Love isn't something you pursue, it's a state you create.

17. Most of my guy friends are my ex-boyfriends.

18. I have been with "BF BOBBY" since 2010 and we have been engaged since 2015.

19. I lived for 18 years being abused my Mother. I have not seen or spoken to her since I left home in 1986 (not by my choice). She has never tried to contact me, even when she heard that I was dying in a hospital in another country. I have made peace with all of this.

20. I communicate with the dead every day, but I really don’t want to die. I really love this life.

21. The greatest ambient influence on my soul is the music of Cocteau Twins and one of the greatest days of life was when I met them… and they knew who I was.

22. After hearing a lengthy speech about me and my influence on my high school, I won a writing award that had not been given at my school in 17 years. I accepted my award to a standing ovation and I was sobbing. I had never felt such a wave of acceptance for just being who I am. That was incredibly profound for having been raised in such a conservative, sheltered, and regressive region.

23. I was voted “Most Cheerful,” and “Most Outrageously Dressed” in my Senior Class in high school.

24. Despite my age, I still enjoy life as if I am just getting started.

25. I think Zombies, Clowns, Republicans, and Christians are four of THE most terrifying things on the planet (besides stupid people).

26. The most disheartening and shocking things in life for me are having to watch and tolerate people choosing Convenience and Self-preservation over Compassion and Kindness. I can’t wait for people to stop hurting animals for food, clothing, and experiments. It is a great and (not so) secret sadness I carry about people.

27. When I look at people and things, I see colors and shapes dancing around and through them and I sometimes know what they mean.

28. I sometimes wonder if I am asexual.

29. I fall in love from the head, down.

30. Believe it, or not, I always do the things I do because I truly love doing most of what I choose to do, and not for any reward, applause, or praise. In fact, while I am grateful for recognition, I am also very shy and uncomfortable when receiving it.


IN MY OWN WORDS

WHO IS TROY? WHO AM I?

I've had a number of new members express confusion and disappointment in not having any personal information about me, Troy, your host and resident Michael Channel here at TLE. So this forum is an effort to remedy that. This post is a collection of ways I can help you get to know me, but other students are encouraged to post their own reviews, complaints, compliments, comments, etc. to add to the fuller picture of who I am, so that it isn't all just from my own perspective. Please be kind!

 

HOW I MET MICHAEL

I have always had access to whatever other realm it is that I see and hear weaving in and out of this plane, but it took me a long time to know what to do with that, and how to live with it. It wasn't until my grandmother died that I finally started experiencing a teaching. I was not even close to my grandmother, but when she died, she started visiting me on a regular basis and teaching me. I couldn't always remember what I was taught, but I know I was learning. I started feeling more comfortable and confident in allowing myself to see and hear this other realm. Eventually, she moved on and I invited a relationship with my own guides.

 

I had two very close guides. I called one Bright, and the other Gyde. Bright brought levity and commentary on life in a way that really helped me understand and process the worst of my life experiences, having grown up in an abusive environment and taking so long to mature. Gyde, however, was more serious in teaching me what would, eventually, be "channeling."

 

I kept written journals of everything I was learning from Gyde. I was terrified and fascinated by everything I was learning. I decided to confide in close friends about all of this, and that was my first wave of validation that would propel me forward into a stable life as a channel. I started inviting friends to ask Gyde anything they wanted to ask. I would pose these questions to Gyde and get responses. These responses were quite specific and sometimes so personal I was embarrassed to relay what I was getting. The personal information was always relevant, accurate, and helpful even when I thought it might be embarrassing. But the most terrifying part for me wasn't the personal stuff. It was the stuff that I could look up. Details about history and past lives and geography that were not in my working intelligence. History and geography were the worst subjects for me in school, and the least-interesting. There was no internet back then, so I had to go to the library to look things up after receiving them from Gyde. I'll never forget the day that I decided to take the list of historic details that had come from the questions about past lives, and go to the library to look everything up to see if there was any truth to it. I was so scared. Because if all of it was correct, then I could no longer ignore or dismiss that something extraordinary was happening. But if all of it were incorrect, then I would have to face that I was potentially crazy.

 

I walked into that library sweating, dizzy, and a mess. I cannot express to you just how scared I was to have this definitive moment. The first thing I looked up was the title of a book. Gyde told me the exact title of a book to look up for how to find a map of Guam and the name of a little village "he" had given me. I almost passed out when the title was there on the shelf. It existed. I opened it up and flipped through to scan to see if there was any mention of the little coastal village. There was even a map in it. But no mention of the village. For a brief moment I felt a strange wave of relief. I was suddenly okay with the possibility that I may have been making all of this up. I could chalk it up to a great imagination and then use that imagination for something else. I almost put the book back on the shelf when I noticed that there was a map printed inside the back hard cover of the book. It was a map of Guam before the United States occupied it. And there, on the coast, was the village. The village was not on the modern maps. It was on the pre-U.S. map.

 

I almost passed out again.

 

Within the month, Gyde told me that "he" would be leaving, as I was "opening to a larger source of information." Honestly, I didn't pay much attention to this because I'm just kind of like that. That week, my best friend (whom would later be confirmed as my Essence Twin) and I experimented with the Ouija Board, which I found tedious, but I was exploring everything, so we tried it. My friend had asked some question that received a response that wasn't very clear. I said out loud, "well, I guess you'll just have to have faith." That word, "faith," was just a normal word to me that I took for granted back then. When we put our hands back to the board to ask something else, we spelled out, "Faith is a lie. Faith is blind acceptance of things one does not know to be true. Why would one presume to lack the right to question and know the truth?"(or something along those lines) Well, because we had such a high opinion of the word "faith" at the time, this seemed like an awful thing to hear! So we stopped using the board and dismissed this as our having accessed something not quite so bright. LOL Oh, the naivety.

 

Later that week, my life would change forever. 

 

I was in an old book store, browsing the metaphyscial books as usual, and as I reached for one book, my sleeve hooked on another book, knocking it from the shelf. I floundered to catch it, and when I did, I chopped the book open somewhere in the middle. I decided to scan the page. My eyes landed on page 111. And I read: “Faith is silly. It is very much a part of the rule of Maya. Why should anyone accept anything on the provision that the thing must never in any way be questioned or doubted?” This was nearly the exact same quote I received just that week from the board! I was at once horrified and deeply moved that such insight was washing over me because of this single word and this new depth of understanding it. I had always taken this single word for granted as being such a positive thing, only to see that it was a word that kind of helped people to stay asleep. If there was this much insight about a single word, what more could this book teach me?

 

It was the book, MESSAGES FROM MICHAEL. Was this "Michael" my "larger source of information?" Is that who contacted me through the board that week?

 

This was just the beginning.

 

I scanned further through the book and found references to Priests, Servers, Old Souls, Young Souls, Goals, Attitudes, etc. All of these things were also my journals kept in my communication with Gyde for the past two years. I had completely misunderstood the terms as literal in my work with Gyde, and had even tried to figure out "soul ages and levels" using numerology, astrology, and other familiar systems. I had no idea I was receiving the foundation of an entirely different system. I thought when Gyde referred to someone as a Priest, it meant he was a priest in a past life. Or a King. And that 3rd Level Old was some numerological correlation. I was so wrong. It started to become clear that I had been in training for working with this Michael, "the larger source of information."

 

Still being dismissive and skeptical, I decided to contact a working Michael channel and see what would happen. Surely if I were in contact with this entity, Micahel would know me. Right? I knew better than to "test" someone doing such a sensitive and precarious art, but I also knew I could only accept that I may be in contact with Michael if Michael told me on their own.

 

I scheduled a session with Holly Coleman, a member of The Michael Educational Foundation at the time. My first contact with a Michael channel was over a pay phone at an outdoor mall in North Carolina. I deliberately restrained from asking anything about channeling or if Michael knew me, blah blah blah. I was really determined to debunk this whole nonsense!

 

But halfway through the session, Michael said, "by the way, we have been waiting for you to remember us. We have work to do together, if you are willing to consider our agreements. You have agreements to channel for us, so that we can reach more of our students. The books you would write will help."

 

And so began my journey as a Michael Channel.

 

For the next two years I worked with Michael before going more public in my private circle of friends. By 1988, I started going more tentatively public. And the rest is history. And I still have to write those books.

 

A LITTLE BIT MORE ABOUT ME

Self-conscious, Self-deprecating, Intuitive, Spiritual, Philosophical, (almost-)Vegan, Gay, Gaymer, Metaphysical Man-Boy with a need to question everything from the nature of the universe to why my friend looked past my shoulder last week. I'm as Passionate about studying The Nature of Reality as I am about playing in it!

 

I look forward to the day when human animals are seen as equal to non-human animals, at least in terms of pursuit for life, freedom, and happiness.

 

I live on an average of 6 hours of sleep, wake up like a happy smurf on crack.

 

I have a keen sense of consideration and compassion for other people and love deciphering the patterns of a person's existence.

 

Although I feel like the oldest of souls, I wake up every day in awe of this amazing life and world as if it is my first day on Earth, even on the worst of days.

 

Part cartoon character, bumbling teacher, overgrown child, and Lucille Ball. I am very wise, yet often have no common sense.

 

I have some serious insecurities that I keep under control, but they sneak out occasionally and I don`t pretend to be above making a fool of myself over my fears. I carry the weight of my emotional responsibility on my own, but I believe a committed relationship/friendship bears the responsibility of making room for BOTH of us and all of our wounds and baggage, which means making room for all of the mess and all of the love. And there IS plenty of room, if you make it.

 

I feel like I love myself, but I can also be my most destructive critic. I am a contradiction of empowering maturity and naive, whiny, childish innocence. I am overly passionate, eagerly romantic, a die-hard idealist, and love exploring art and culture as much as I enjoy domestic downtime.

 

I never get bored.


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