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  1. 43 points
    MEntity: Hello to each of you. We are here, now. We can begin. We have received Troy's request and understand. We will respond. What we have done is look at each of you in attendance today and assessed a common theme among you. We will address this theme and then address each of you in regard to that theme. We also know that we are not speaking only to those in attendance today. What we share may help address those who attend in another time and format. From what we can see, each of you, regardless of what is happening in your life, what is demanding of you, what is distracting you, what is bringing you happiness, what is bringing you joy, what is challenging you, what is lifting you, each of you are struggling with a theme of DEFEAT. We are using this term to capture a wide range of Defeat that comes from existential crisis. There is something, someone, or some undercurrent that is wearing at each of you and it is all you can do to stay as many steps ahead of a wave of total defeat as you can. For the past 2 to 5 years, each of you appear to have been relying on great strength, support, insight, confidence, wisdom, patience, etc. to stay as many steps ahead of this sense of defeat that is trailing just behind you. It is exhausting. In the past year, some of you may have begun to feel as if you are at a breaking point. The truth is, none of you will ever "give up." None of you will. None of you are interested in resigning in any way. You have been "fighting" far too long for this haunting defeat to get the best of you. But this theme of defeat is demoralizing. Whether from world events or personal events, or a combination of both, the wave of powerlessness and defeat has reduced your sense of presence and participation in this life to some extent. Even if you are involved and active, there is a part of you that is not. A great part of you. A part of you that simply wants something better and knows that it does not have to be this hard. Here is something to consider: THIS HAPPENS IN EVERY LIFETIME, IN EVERY LIFE, IN EVERY PERSON, IN EVERY TIME. World events and personal events are incidental. They are details. From your first lifetime to your last, you will have a wave of existential crisis. In your earlier lifetimes, it manifests in ways that simply prompted reactionary defenses that blindly lash out against the experience. As you wake up and evolve and are aware within a lifetime, you begin to find the correlations between your crisis and events. The irony is that this moment for anyone in any Soul Age is triggered by a moment of contact with Essence. For those of you who are older souls who sustain those moments of contact, the effect can be quite challenging. The more you are in contact with Essence, the more you Manifest Essence, the more you live AS Essence, the deeper into an existential crisis your Personality can go. It is not about Trump. It is not about your lost love. It is not about your lack of direction or motivation. It is not about your fellow human beings and their idiocy. It is not about life or your life, at all. It is about the process of grasping your infinity while finite. The more you are in contact with that vastness of infinity, the more you may turn your focus to the "comforts" of the finite. This points you toward the important events of your current life and the short amount of time you have to resolve or solve these challenges. How can you embrace your vastness of infinity without losing all concerns for the challenges that are a reality in this finite form? If you exist in cycles that are GRAND and you are told that you have come and gone through many of those cycles, there must have been many things that felt desperately important and now you simply do not remember them or know a thing about those moments from other universes and times and places. How do you care about a life that is a blink in the vastness of existence? How do you embrace the vastness of existence while grieving loss or wishing for better or fighting for equality and peace? If you embrace your vastness, will you not care anymore? If you care too deeply, are you rejecting your vastness? Here is the "twist:" You and your life are a microcosm of your Essence and "the universe." The more you live as Essence, the more you care; the more you pay attention. The more it matters to you how a single day goes. The cumulative effect of caring how your day goes is the same cumulative effect that comes from your Essence caring about how a life goes. In other words, you are already reconciling your vastness of infinity while in finite form when you GIVE A SHIT ABOUT YOUR EXISTENCE. When you care so much about how the next day will go for you, for your relationships, for your future, for your fellow humans, for the planet, for the animals, for life; when you care so much that it hurts, and you continue to care anyway, you have become the very heart of your infinite vastness. The aching and overwhelm you feel is because of how the body processes that vastness of caring. It is not quite designed to sustain that current of energy. This is why you find a teaching and teachers. Because you cannot simply leap into the vastness of your existence while in a body and expect to sustain that current of energy. It is an energy that is no different from what an Infinite Soul must sustain. And it will "burn up" the circuitry of you. The existential crisis comes in every lifetime for every Personality, and it is often ignored or blindly buried, but for the older soul, you embrace the hurting. You sit with it. You carry it. And you learn better how to sit with it and carry it so that it is transformed from hurting and into power, peace, and presence. Your teachers and your teachings help you to navigate, manage, and understand that this current of caring THIS MUCH about a person, about a life, yourself, a relationship, the future, the planet, etc is a POWER, not a burden. It is a responsibility, not an imposition. A choice, not an interference. The work you do in this single lifetime regarding what you care about is what propels your vastness of existence in infinity. We have told all of you that once you exist, you cannot unexist. This is true on all levels from your individual Personalities to your Roles in Essence and Essence, itself. However, you also cannot UN-CARE. Why do you think you exist through an entire Grand Cycle and into many more? Why do you think you "leave" Tao and return to cycles of incarnation through various species in different star systems and universes? Because you care. Because ALL OF IT MATTERS TO YOU. You cannot exist without caring. You cannot. It is one of only a few impossibilities. And so, in every lifetime, you come to a crisis point where you must learn how to care so much that it hurts, and then grow bigger still than that hurt. It does not matter how big or small the thing is that you care about. It does not matter how private and personal that thing is or how shared and public and grand that thing is. It is the caring that matters. How you live this life and navigate how you care is a microcosmic reflection of the evolution of your soul, of you AS a soul. Your Essence has no shame in the depth that it cares about you. You can practice unapologetically caring deeply for humanity, for life, for your relationship, for your well-being, etc. Whatever prompts your caring, even if it is confusing and hurts, is a piece of your vastness being expressed. Transform the experience of impending defeat and demoralizing into an empowerment that you shamelessly own as your right of existence. You need not run from defeat any longer. You need not question your value and point of existence when you care so deeply about something that is well beyond your control. You need not turn your caring into a liability that must be reduced or masked in anger or frustration. Care. That is all you need to do. Just care. Sometimes you can do something about that, and sometimes you cannot, but you can always care. Caring, like Existence, is a constant. Neither are dependent upon being all-powerful. When you do not know what to do, it can hurt. Let that sense of hurting be a reminder to care for yourself at that point. When you cannot be all powerful in helping those things you care about, you can always remember to include your self-care. It will not take away from the care you have for anything or anyone else. When you "care so much it hurts," it is because you have left yourself out of the equation of caring. WE WILL ADDRESS EACH OF YOU WITH A MESSAGE NOW THAT MAY TOUCH ON THE PATTERNS OF WHAT YOU CARE ABOUT ANN - The pattern we see for you is that you care deeply about being RELEVANT. We encourage you to continue to care about this. Care deeply about this. Expand your definition of it and carefully consider an update to what it means and what it looks like and how it can be nurtured. Your caring about being relevant is not a superficial concern. It is a desire to create and communicate and disseminate. You are not done saying what you have to say. It is okay to care about this. CONG - The pattern we see for you is that you care deeply about THE FUTURE. It is difficult to care so deeply about the future because it never arrives. It is always just out of reach, always in a vague state of potential and possibility. But that is why you care. You pay close attention to your choices, your direction, your focus, your priorities and the people who are a part of this because you are nurturing an empowered relationship of existence between the past, present, and future so that these co-exist in everything you do. LUCIANA - The pattern we see in you is that you care deeply about BEING SEEN. You care deeply about who you are and how you are and what that looks like to yourself and to others. This is not a shallow or shameful thing to care about. You are experimenting with SELF-REFLECTION. It is one thing to simply exist and BE, but quite another to SEE and BE SEEN. However vast you are, observation snaps you into form in some way and you are exploring all of the ways that you "snap into form" through your own eyes and the eyes of others, so you can better learn how to create the story of who you are, rather than let it be told by others. MAUREEN - The pattern we see in you is that you care deeply about BEING RIGHT. This can show up in combative ways within yourself and even around you, but that is because you are still exploring the concept on different levels. When we use the term "right," we use it to refer to an alignment with Truth, Love, and Beauty/Energy, such as RIGHT WORK, RIGHT ACTION. It matters deeply to you that you are Right, that you are in alignment with the highest values of this universe and how they play out in your life and the world. It is painful to sustain this sense of Being Right when there is so much "wrong," and so your fight can sometimes fall into being "correct" or being vindicated or being justified. Those are simply lower and more accessible ways of tapping into what you care about, but it is never about being correct or justified or vindicated. It is always a cry from within you to stand strong as a beacon of alignment with remembering what is True, what is Love, and what is Beautiful. To help clarify this for you, Maureen, it may be more fitting to say that you care deeply about RIGHT BEING, rather than Being Right. RACHEL - The pattern we can see in you is that you care deeply about WHERE TO STAND. This may seem to be a vague phrase, but it is quite specific. You care deeply about taking a position in your life, with other people, with your creativity, with your relationships, etc. in a way that profoundly represents the truth of your being. However, you are still trying to figure out what this truth of your being is. You cannot take a stand or hold a position until you feel you have a comfortable grasp what you know is true for you and about you. This exploration can leave you feeling as if you have no foundation upon which to stand or be in relation to others and your dreams. Give yourself the time and space to create that foundation. It matters to you to take a position that you trust and care about and that reflects your passion. It could be said that what you care about is the evolution of your passion and learning how to let that represent you in the world. SUSAN - What we can see in your patterns is that you care deeply about PRESERVATION. There is a deep desire within you to help repair, preserve, conserve, protect, serve, restore, etc. various ecosystems within your life and the lives of others. These "ecosystems" may be bodies, may be relationships, may be environmental, may be ideas, but it matters to you to care that these systems are noticed and nurtured and remembered and even pointed out for others to consider. We use the term "preservation" because it is matters to you that they last, that these systems carry you and others forward wherever that may be, but forward, regardless. Some of the general struggles you may have in your life may relate to your caring about preserving and restoring and repairing all of the systems that you know make a difference and need someone to heal these. UMA - From what we can see in your patterns is that you care deeply about BEING INCLUDED. You care so deeply about this that it hurts. It hurts when you feel excluded and it hurts to exclude and it hurts when you see others are excluded or exclude themselves. Any breakdown in a network of caring and creating is devastating, both in personal terms and in global terms. You know that Being Included must stand as a permanent invitation and vulnerability and you refuse to resign from upholding a state of inclusion for yourself and others. This does not mean you have no boundaries or that you will not say No, or hear someone say No. You know that inclusion cannot be forced. And that is why it can be painful when you must simply stand as an invitation and watch how it unfolds. BOBBY - What we can see as a pattern in you is that you care deeply about CONTRIBUTING. You are a giver. However guarded or isolated or open or involved you are with others and the world, it has always mattered to you what you GIVE. It is painful when you cannot give or when what you give is not enough or even too much or not what is wanted. But you continue to give when you can and how you can. The greatest gift you have found that you can give when you are out of everything and resources are low and even energy is low, is JOY. You give kindness, a smile, a joke, a tease, anything that could provoke a moment of joy. This ensures that you are contributing in some way, somehow, any how. It is baffling to you when others cannot seem to make that same effort, but it does not stop you. You care deeply about participating in life and are, quite frankly, in awe of life, and so you give as much life as you can. When you feel the shadow of defeat chasing after you, it is because you may have forgotten to give some of that life to yourself, or you have suddenly decided to grade yourself on just how much you are contributing. And finally, TROY - Your patterns reveal that what you care deeply about is INTEGRITY. Regardless of your passions and interests and paths, they are created from a deep caring for honesty, principles, decency, trust, etc. Every focus of activism or play or fight or communication is about upholding that Integrity. It is painful to see others undermine their integrity through hypocrisy or through compartmentalization or through denial. It is overwhelming and exhausting to monitor yourself and others in terms of calling out where integrity is threatened or in danger of collapsing. From animal rights to human rights to the work you do with us to your interest in movies and music and even gaming, the motivation and passion of focus comes from that deep caring for Integrity and where that is represented in art, communication, humanity, etc. For each of you, we can continue our discussion with you individually in other formats regarding what we describe as what we see you care so deeply about. We know you may have questions or comments regarding these words from us. We also suggest that you consider these to be only words from us, not conclusive statements. The words we shared today about you are from our perception and assessment, not from a static record. You may care about other things that stand out to you far more than what we see today. Let yourself care about what you care about and allow it to be a strength for you, not a shame or liability or pain. Let the hurt be a reminder to care about yourself, but know that some of that hurt is only your growing pains. We must conclude here for today. Good day to each of you. Goodbye, for now.
  2. 25 points
    I got some general info on the Nexus Bubble/the next Nexus in monday's POF: Nadine: Hello Michael, I have some questions regarding the recent Nexus Bubble and the following Nexus. You have stated that during a Nexus Bubble there is an increased feeling of pressure on the individual because there is no spinning off of new parallels. However, the last Nexus we had, as well as the upcoming one, were/are Convergences, without any new parallels spinning off, if I understand the process correctly. So I don't understand how these Convergences would relieve pressure instead of creating even more? Please explain. Nadine: Also, regarding the upcoming Convergence you've said: „August 25th - 27th - NEXUS – CONVERGENCE - This Nexus window looks to bring with it a further shift toward “strength in numbers” regarding altering the course of history regarding potential war.“ Is this a Nexus solely on a global level or does it play out on an individual level as well, and if so, how? MEntity: Parallels are generated on a regular basis by every individual. Whether we highlight a Convergence or a Divergence in our reports, all of you are still spinning off variations of your lives based on choices you make. What was unique about the Nexus Bubble was that this halted altogether for everyone. This is highly unusual and it had an effect. When the Nexus Bubble ended, the greater patterns point to a Convergence, but what has come to bring some relief is that each of you are back to generating your own variations and parallel branches. MEntity: The Nexus Bubble has ended, and all of you are back to allowing your own parallels, but that does mean you have generated any. For many of our students, the Nexus Bubble has ended, but no parallel branches have been generated. The relief may still be there, but it may be tentative and wavering until you generate a personal divergence that may bring more focus and footing. MEntity: What we focus on in our reports is what is happening collectively, so a Convergence or a Divergence will not have any bearing on what each of you generate on your own. Nadine: Oh, okay, I thought the different levels were kind of hooked into each other MEntity: The Nexus Bubble appears to have been a halt on all parallel activity as a way to reduce the "noise" of that process and help draw together all of the parallels that can merge in a form of solidarity for a better future than what was being seen in probabilities. The two Convergences that followed the Nexus Bubble are all about strengthening a focus on a future that is viable and more preferable to what had been on trajectory. MEntity: It is true that the different levels are hooked into each other, which is how a Convergence or Divergence is generated collectively, but it is not unusual that you generate a divergent parallel or two during a wave where most are converging. MEntity: The August 25th Nexus is global. We tend to focus on Global in our reports, but sometimes they are about a dominant theme of pockets across different regions where some may or may not see the effects.
  3. 21 points
    I wish I could say this didn't resonate with me at all, but I'd be lying. They may as well said "Heidi" ( or any one of your names!) at the beginning of each sentence. So thankful for this. I'll probably be rereading it a few times.
  4. 21 points
    This was an amazing Workshop and experience. So much was clarified for me, and so many things were really outstanding: So many of the ideas that swirl around in my head and conversations! I love Michael's answers. So personal yet so universal.
  5. 20 points
    I pretty much cried the whole session. It described what I have been through over the past few years, when I can physically feel the psychological pain. Often. It has a lot to do with my ET but I always know it's deeper than that. What I resonate the most is when they said we took out self-care from the equation. This is exactly what I realized a few weeks before this session. Wow. I somehow managed to finally get that message. Sometimes when we get so passionate about a goal, a result, a person, a cause, we forget about ourselves and the scars that we carry because of the pursuit. At some point, you will face those wounds and you become shocked by how ugly they look. It's surreal. I am going through that self-care and acceptance phase lately. I often think philosophically why life is so heavy. I often think of my dear friend Anthony Bourdain. I think of Earnest Hemingway too, who I am fairly sure is a Sage and shares with me some kind of links. Funny that Tony was often consider a Culinary Hemingway. And reading the "Old Man and the Sea" during my teenage years was a defining moment in my life. "A man can be destroyed but not defeated." Oh yeah, it's a little strange how I want this line to define my character since such a young age. Imagine how I feel when Michael said the theme is "defeat". Of course it is. My essence always knows and always embraces it. I am, almost sure these two friends died because of the sense of defeat and feeling of powerlessness. They couldn't reconcile the differences between who they wanted to be and what was a reality that they felt powerless about. Self-care and acceptance of hurt have always been challenging for souls like us...I am not exactly sure why. Maybe a Sage's eternal struggle with existence. Or the "tears of a clown". "This is why you find a teaching and teachers. Your teachers and your teachings help you to navigate, manage, and understand that this current of caring THIS MUCH about a person, about a life, yourself, a relationship, the future, the planet, etc is a POWER, not a burden. It is a responsibility, not an imposition. A choice, not an interference." I will always remember that. I hope my friends who share the same struggles can embrace this profound truth too.
  6. 19 points
    Wow. Tears here too and also wishing this didn't resonate so much. Sometimes when Michael talks about many or most students I feel like I'm one of the not many but not this time. Just yesterday I woke up saying "I'm so tired of the fight". Every day there's more feelings of defeat than victory. This brings a whole new lens to our caring and embracing it, which truthfully feels like another huge challenge but perhaps is more a soft change of focus. Mind once again officially blown!
  7. 19 points
    Tears. This is profound/moving. How does this resonate with those that participated? Thank you for sharing this. The demoralisation - yes. Caring so much it hurts I can also validate.
  8. 18 points
    Oh my god, you guys, I just stumbled on this in a transcript from 2004: "Over the year we see approximately 5 fragments in the final levels of the Young or Baby Soul Ages becoming strong, pivotal, public forces toward helping support changes in favor of the Mature Soul world. One fragment in particular appears to be known as Donald Trump. You may be surprised as to who “comes out” in support of controversial Rights." Oh my god.
  9. 18 points
    This is an amazing session and it brought me to tears. I have been feeling a sense of defeat throughout this year and have been so exhausted. It is difficult getting through the days. I can relate to most of the individual assessments too. Thanks!
  10. 17 points
    Wow. I’ve been knocked out the last couple days by the worst cold I’ve had in years, and along with it is a sense of hopelessness and defeat related to starting a business. I even thought to myself that I’ve come to far to give up now. I chalked it off to my brain not functioning optimally, but it is still “my stuff” that is coming up. I can tell that looming sense of defeat is right there with me when I come down from periods of high energy. I still don’t quite understand how to embracing caring and deal with the sense of defeat though. Seems like some journaling is in order.
  11. 16 points
    My goodness this was a powerful one! And it came at a good time for me. I keep rereading it because so much of this speaks to me right now. I care SO much for my loved ones. I get lost in that caring. It consumes me. I cannot UNCARE. And it's true that when you care so much it hurts that I'm leaving myself out of the "caring" part.
  12. 16 points
    OMG what a session!!! So much that could be quoted, and is already quotet above also. Thank you so much Michael and Troy. I was really wondering about the existential crises I've been feeling and the resigning... and breaking point. I've been thinking that maybe I'm just getting old and tired of everything, and tired of not "getting anywhere" with myself and my life... I feel so useless. "Let that sense of hurting be a reminder to care for yourself at that point." I will let any hurting be my fuel from now on, fuel for self-care.
  13. 16 points
    I have to make a comment. What was said here really has everything to do with me. I myself have been thinking a lot these days, and I even told it to some people, that I became obsessed with the way people see me. I really liked the ending in which Michael speaks. You can better learn how to create the story of who you are, rather than let it be told by others. It seems like that's what I'm trying to do .. Even because what I've been told most of my life is that I would not be as capable as people's coucars ... But it's funny that I have trouble believing when someone Tell me the opposite .. this is a contradiction that I will address with Michael ..
  14. 15 points
    @Troy and Michael and all participants !!! This session is such a highlight, thank You all so much !!! ME: The work you do in this single lifetime regarding what you care about is what propels your vastness of existence in infinity. I got so many answers for myself out of this one sentence. ME: You cannot exist without caring. You cannot. It is one of only a few impossibilities. Caring, like Existence, is a constant. Neither are dependent upon being all-powerful. Very soothing, in a lot of ways. ME: When you "care so much it hurts" it is because you have left yourself out of the equation of caring. Rings the bell, in such a simplistic way. Love is all inclusive, Victory includes defeat. I sooo love what each participant cares about and all the peoples, its a thread of the weave.
  15. 14 points
    Hi.. My Name Marcino, I'm new with Michael Teaching (MT). I have been channeled by Dave Gregg and got the result 5 August 2018. I hope I can learn from Troy, Janet and all of you about MT to validate the result.
  16. 14 points
    After some thinking on what I deeply care about, I think it might be the same or similar to Ann's "Being Relevant." I want to matter to more than a handful of people. I want to teach and have an influence. It drives me to be more, to challenge myself, to not settle. It also drives me nuts when I'm working in a place where I don't feel relevant. I've tried to be satisfied with mundane work, but it has never been enough. I always dream of more. It is time for me to pursue it without apology and without worrying about defeat. Wow. I just had the most heart-wrenching cry after writing the previous paragraph. I don't think I've ever fully embraced this desire without shaming it or fearing I couldn’t do it or holding it back in some way.
  17. 14 points
    Adding all my love and gratitude! TLE, you are so beautiful. My greatest fellow students and teachers. Your lives and questions always prompt gems of Love Truth and Beauty. Thank you for Caring. Thank you for Being Here Now!
  18. 13 points
    This is interesting. I was talking with my wife the other day about the kids the president is detaining. How I wanted to like take several buses and drive through gate and load them up and take them to Canada or something. And then remember almost crying when I stated but I can't do that. So this resonated really close to home.
  19. 13 points
    Really great session that will be one to re-read. Although this year feels like less defeat for me than it seems for others, i still go through periods of feeling defeated. This year for me feels more like im done taking peoples shit, and im finally doing for me for the first time ever. I really liked reading about each person in the session. I resonate with Troys caring about integrity. Honesty is a big deal to me. I also resonate with @Cong caring about the future. That has been hard because living in the future causes anxiety. I try very hard to just be here, but i do still care deeply about the future. Also, just my personal opinion but @Bobby has always been part of the glue that holds TLE together. I probably wouldnt be on here right now if it werent for you being there to talk to about my sessions that got so far overdue. Your humor is a huge contribution here to me also. Anyway, great session and ill be reading it more than a couple times.
  20. 13 points
    What a fantastic session!!! @Uma, I really could relate.Inclusion in a meaningful way is important to me, whether I admit it or not. @Bobby, your musings, jokes and valuable contributions are ESSENTIAL. Thank you for what you conttibute! @Maureen, alas....this looks like the "plight" of a Priest who cares DEEPLY. May you continue your efforts at "righting the ship" so to speak, as your wisdom, Tuth,Love & Energy are so very much needed in this world. And @ Troy-GAME ON!!! And thank you for valuing integrity as much as you do. Bless you all!
  21. 11 points
    Over this past week I've become hyper-aware of my lack of flow (which BTW is my GOAL). When anything impinges on my plan for the day I feel so put out I have to say it's almost comical. I have an extreme state of anxiety over losing even a minute of my self care, which I'm also exceedingly proud of my ability to maintain over the past few months. I'm really really not liking this side of myself. I think this may have something to do with the whole DOGMA thing but am unable to grasp it. I've had some awful and wonderful experiences this week but I'm struggling to feel and acknowledge the wonderful ones because the stress of my rigidity. I sense there's a huge growth opportunity here and also just want to say fuck you growth opportunities, give it a rest already!
  22. 11 points
    NEXUS INCOMING!! August 25th - 27th -- NEXUS -- CONVERGENCE - This Nexus window looks to bring with it a further shift toward “strength in numbers” regarding altering the course of history regarding potential war. The awareness of potential war and great conflict may begin to rise and be taken more seriously. This rise in awareness and serious consideration is necessary for helping to update the patterns that have been in a battle between Young Soul ideas of conflict as necessary for growth and the new Mature Soul ideas of compassion as necessary for growth.
  23. 11 points
    Great session!! Lots of insight and clarity on the times we're in right now, personally, and in the world at large. I'm one of the many who cares so much it hurts. I've been learning that this is how we expand. It's how we evolve. We grow into ourselves. Like the old movie title I mentioned to Royce the other day it is all about Love, Pain, and the Whole Damn Thing. That's life. That's how we renew ourselves and "stay alive". We grow through the pain and we learn to include it and, possibly, we may even learn to love it, unconditionally. ALL of THIS is ALL of US... and no matter what there is always LOVE. The work you do in this single lifetime regarding what you care about is what propels your vastness of existence in infinity. What stood out for me with my pattern was how much it related to a couple of sessions I've had with Michael over the last couple of years. 1) My 2018 Quick Preview or Personality's "Platform" is RIGHT ACTION. Right Action is not about being “right,” but about integrity in vulnerability. 2) Also at the MMW, The Health of Your Moving Center, on June 18, 2016 Michael and I had this Q&A: MEntity: Maureen - to bring your Moving Center into greater health, we can suggest that you STOP COMPARING. In truth, one cannot stop comparing, but the phrase is important as a means of catching yourself when you are in a spiral of comparisons that undermine your energy. Maureen: Michael, just to be clear on what you told me. I don't find myself in comparisons with the classic "others" (unless that's a blindspot) but I do often find I "compare" myself to an ideal, a standard, or an expectation that is within me. In other words it feels more personal than external. Is that what you see or am I missing something? MEntity: Maureen - we are not speaking of comparing yourself to others, though that is certainly included. The primary area of comparison that hurts you is in your comparing expectation to reality. Reality can knock you down for days because of this. MEntity: By "reality" here we speak of the behavior of others, the differences in understanding and comprehension, the differences in what you would do vs what someone else might have done. The reason it can be overlooked is because all of it makes perfect sense because you are often right, correct. MEntity: But it hurts you. Maureen: That hit a nerve. Now I'm crying. MEntity: We can speak to you in more depth about this for healing, but simply knowing this can help you to stop for a moment and ask if it is productive.
  24. 11 points
    I also cried at this. I hold a sense of defeat that if I don't do anything, nobody else will either. Or even if I do something, I still fear no one else will follow up. If we're not responsible for creating better futures for ourselves, each other & the planet then we will live in a system that's same old same old until the problems of wealth inequality, seeming lack of choice, violence, global warming, capitalism, consumerism, current resource use etc. get so bad it will be incredibly painful. I do not want to leave that for future generations to inherit. That's gross, selfish and negligent. That's why we have a Culture Wars ongoing for at least half a century. If I don't do anything I fear that's the world I will grow up in- one devoid of true creativity. True creativity always stems from our power of responsibility for changing our self and life to one better suited to our evolution. And these problems will happen, over and over again until we FACE them from the very root cause, or in the worst case we die. Those are the simple facts. The above is my issue from a global perspective. But it also translates in personal terms. I'm the only one responsible for creating my own life and future. It both sucks and is awesome because I really feel my power of choice for how I fuel and create my every moment- and there's no escape from what you have woken up to.
  25. 11 points
    I'm re-reading the session. And that part really caught my attention during the worshop and now rereading. I reckon that when I started to participate in groups of people more focused on spirituality I noticed something. Most seemed much more worried about the world than I was. Or more concerned about becoming a therapist and helping others. But I always had a tendency to feel that helping the world or other people was totally out of my reach. What I wanted was to make my life better. I think that's still what I want. Maybe that will change one day. But I do not know is a pretty strong feeling in me. So this part made me feel a bit relieved. Another interesting thing is that I noticed the word shame has appeared quite frequently in my sections. In my last (last month) POF was said: MEntity: You are uniquely you and there is no shame in this In a POF I attended in May it was said: There is no shame in waiting and exploring for your best path of contribution. And now nese worshop Michael said to me: The word shame has appeared again, that is from May to here is the third time. I just found it interesting. But that caring about how to be seen makes sense to me. Last year I seriously considered not joining any group anymore because it did not hurt what I did I always seemed to be seen as a weak person or someone who does a lot of drama. Even though that was not what I wanted to get through. but it looks like it's being a bit different.
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