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Showing content with the highest reputation since 04/19/2019 in Posts

  1. 61 points
    BACKSTORY: As most of you already know, I live with a chronic immune system condition that is mostly known as A.I.D.S. I am “perfectly” healthy and in a state they describe as “undetectable,” meaning they can’t find any HIV in my blood at all. I live on a cocktail of medications that supposedly help keep me alive, and my own vegan diet helps tremendously in countering any serious issues. But I still struggle with ups and downs of health that are often vague and oppressive and include headaches/migraines, extreme fatigue, low-grade constant cold symptoms that sometimes explode into severe colds, and then sometimes I fall flat into some scary states that have yet to be diagnosed or understood and these knock me off my feet for days. This isn’t how I live my life every day, but these things often disrupt my life and my focus on work. Add to this the weight of depression that has slowly crept into my life since Trump got elected. It may seem silly, but it has truly affected the quality of life for many of my friends. I’ve never experienced depression before and finally had to accept that I endure it now. I think it’s pretty mild compared to clinical depression, so for those who suffer clinical depression, my heart goes out to you. It has exacerbated the health issues above. And I have to admit that my diagnosis of A.I.D.S. 12 years ago still haunts me and weighs on me every single day. It’s not something that is easy to live with psychologically. I am as healthy as anyone else, but it’s like a ticking time bomb that keeps you living in a state between life and death. This actually helps my relationship with Michael and improves the quality of the channeling, so there’s that! When I was dying of pneumonia in that hospital bed in The Netherlands in 2007, I actually got to “meet” Michael before I fell into my 5-day coma. It was surreal and disturbing and beautiful, and it was one of the most comforting moments I’ve ever experienced. I think it calmed me down and helped me trust in my existence and let my body do its work of recovery. I don’t know. But I survived. When I returned to NYC from The Netherlands, it would take me 5 years to breathe normal again and I was very lucky that New York State has health programs in place that help those with no insurance to get the healthcare and prescriptions necessary for survival. I have been gratefully living with that healthcare since 2007. So the good news is that I’m surviving and thriving! And on paper, I am healthy and have nothing to worry about. These random states of health do not define me or my life, but I also can’t ignore them, so I eat as best I can, and take my medications, and use the Michael Teachings to help me understand and create and evolve all through these ups and downs. But my healthcare is essential... which leads me to 2019. FAST-FORWARD TO 2019 As 2019 approached, I was alerted that I would no longer be eligible for my healthcare. I have been living with profound stress and uncertainty for all of 2019. I fought to keep my healthcare and lost. Eventually I was free-falling. I could no longer get check ups, bloodwork, and my supposed life-saving medications were running out. This was so stressful for me that my health and my optimism took a nosedive and I’ve been struggling off and on all year. It has affected my work for all of you, not in terms of quality of channeling, but in terms of my keeping up and staying on schedule. I honestly felt like I was having to get my private life in order and prepare to die. If not soon, then at least sooner than I expected. Suddenly the past 12 years felt like borrowed time and I had run out of it. To be perfectly honest, I was terrified. Truly scared for my life. It never matters how much you understand and work with the dead... dying is a big deal! But I kept it together and continued to research and ask for help from sources that could help me. I’m self-employed and do not make enough money to cover health insurance on my own, but I also make too much money to qualify for the Medicaid I had been with for all of these years. So my focus has been heavily directed toward saving my life and this distraction has disrupted a lot of my schedule and plans. I’ve been doing the best I can to juggle all of this... And it finally paid off! I GOT MY HEALTHCARE BACK! My advocate directed me to a program for which I qualify and I am in the process of restoring my healthcare! When my advocate told me this, I broke down in tears. I had been carrying the weight of this for so long, mostly privately and alone because it was too heavy to share. I just wanted to focus on solutions. And I finally found one. BACK TO WORK So if you have noticed or sensed my distance and distraction, now you know why. And I’m very happy to say that I can once again reclaim my energy and direct it back to thriving and not just surviving. Please be patient with me if you are in my backlog of sessions. It’s not a big backlog, so it won’t take too much time, but thank you for being patient. I can also return focus to Wholeness of Souls, TLEGG, our Michael Books, and other projects in the works! Thank you for all of your love and patience and understanding and kindness. I’m back. Troy PS - a special thank you and deep gratitude for TeamTLE for helping me keep it together. I could not have survived this without them. I love you all so much.
  2. 45 points
    ENERGY REPORT May 2019 2019 OVERLEAVES ROLE: Artisan (emphasized all year) CENTER: Moving (emphasized all year) GOAL: Flow → Acceptance/Discrimination (emphasized Jan - Mar) MODE: Observation → Passion/Reserve (emphasized Apr - Jun) ATTITUDE: Realist (emphasized Jul - Sep) CHIEF FEATURES: Self-Destruction (emphasized Oct - Dec) MAY arrives almost unexpectedly and with some surprise as the months of 2019 begin to “blur” together with little to nothing differentiating them. This is part of the effect of Flow in the Negative Pole. Until there is a “slide” into meaningful Acceptance or Discrimination on a collective level, this will continue to be the case and the sense of inevitability and point of no return will escalate. As the Mode of Observation continues to be emphasized, it may seem to many of our students that there is only a Negative Pole position of Surveillance in relation to events in the world. This is a position that feels as if one must simply watch from a distance the unfolding of events and have little to no effect on them. Because of the lack of collective Positive Pole navigation of the first few months of this year, many of our students may find that they turn their attention back to the details of their personal lives and focus on what can be done there. Many of our students are Observing their lives from the Positive Pole of Clarity and improving the Flow of their lives from the Positive Pole of Freedom as they increase Productivity (Moving Center) and Creativity (Artisan). Ironically, this is precisely what is needed for many to do as a way to contribute to a collective return of navigation through the Positive Poles. We think that most of our students are in a process of deep and personal reflection regarding their more immediate necessities and care and this is helping free up energy and power that can then be directed toward grander visions and projects. May has a strong energy of support for self-care, self-reflection, clarity, and calm recollection of yourself. Some of you may have felt a surge of intensity as if “hitting a wall” with your patience and flexibility. This is not a bad sign. For those who experienced this over the end of April and beginning of May, it is an experience that is reminding you of your limits and/or an unlocking of permission for your power. Many are in a state of inner conflict over how to navigate challenges in life and in the world that force them to behave in ways that are unnatural to them, such as “getting angry,” “drawing a line,” clarifying boundaries and redefining themselves in terms of ethical and compassionate choices and actions. We think that most of our students will have “that moment” over the next 30 to 90 days if they have not experienced it, yet. As you navigate May, enjoy your moments of calm and embrace your moments of power. DATES OF INTEREST (dates are approximate): May 4th -- Energy Shift -- GROUNDING - A shift toward calm, patience, and persistence that may prompt students to step back, pause, reconnect, realign, and focus on something that brings and shares joy. This shift may carry in effect for the rest of May. May 18th - 21st -- NEXUS -- CONVERGENCE - A merging of parallels that are focused on emotional closure, emotional peace, True Grounding, and being “done” with unnecessary struggles and challenges, all while reclaiming a certain amount of collective power and pleasure through revitalizing social connections and directions. HELPFUL THOUGHTS OVER MAY: TOGETHER, WE STAND; TOGETHER, WE SIT - Collective forces are not always about moving forward, but about taking a moment to authentically look at each other instead of looking ahead. Our students may feel a desire to reach out, reach back, and truly acknowledge those in the life who are of meaningful and vital love, friendship, and kindness. Allow yourselves to sit down together and look at each other even as you know you must return to standing up and looking forward together.
  3. 35 points
    Ok this going to sound backwards and weird, but I usually have to canceled events or move my schedule around because I have a headache or feel shitty, but today I am canceling Michael Speaks for exactly the opposite reason. Ever since the stress of my healthcare/insurance issue has been relieved, I have been feeling pretty fantastic. Both in body and spirit. I had no idea how much stress I was carrying for so long. But I’ve been feeling so much better in almost all ways. I still have my chronic issues I have to navigate but these are made so much easier without stress. I spend nearly every every day either feeling good but missing out because I’m in trance half the day or feeling crappy, so this weekend I just wanted to take some time to enjoy being with friends, playing, reading, doing some admin work, etc. So, for the first time ever (I think?) I am taking the day off just... because. I hope all of you have a great day and that you know it's ok to take time for your own self-care and grounding and just letting your brain and heart and body rest and/or play for a day. Don't worry! May is a busy month full of new Michael events and social events! Love to everyone!!
  4. 32 points
    I've finally made a list I wanted to do for a long time. But where should it be shared?? @Janet @Troy The 7 Choices The 7 Basic Rights -- from OMW - Tending To Your 7 Basic Rights The 7 Circles of Abandonment The 7 Circles of Conscience -- from a Ask Michael session The 7 Degrees of Chaos (might be posted later) The 7 Degrees of Risk (might be posted later) The 7 Emotions The 7 Facets of Mastery The 7 Facets of Role -- NMW The 7 Forms of Guilt -- from "Guilt 101" The 7 Forms of Social Change The 7 Kingdoms of Lifeforms The 7 Levels of Choice The 7 Levels of Essence Contact The 7 Levels of Mind The 7 Levels of True Community - from "Community" The 7 Metaphysical Strengths & Living Without Fear The 7 Methods of Choice The 7 Nobilities -- from OMW - Choice vs Circumstances The 7 Phases of Manifesting - in "Manifesting" The 7 Planes of Existence The 7 Points/States of Wakefulness/Sleep -- from OMW - "You and Your Realities" The 7 Rings of Love The 7 Spheres of Awareness of Essence The 7 Stages of Committment -- in a M Speaks session The 7 Stages of Fulfilling a Life Task The 7 Stages of Goal -- NMW session The 7 Stages of Internal Wholeness -- Maureen's private session The 7 Stages of The Next Step -- from OMW "The Next Step" The 7 Types of Dishonesty and Honesty The 7 Waves & Elements of The Michael Teachings The 7 Ways a Body Can Die or Be Wounded -- from M Speaks On Healing & Healers The 7 Goals, Modes, Attitudes, Body Types, Centers and Chief Features -- in Overleaves & Personality The 9 Circles of Community The 9 Karmic Sequences (Stories) The 9 Needs - from April 2009 The 9 Needs - from OMW March 2014 The 9 Pillars or Trues The 9 Potential Seeds of Sub-personalities The 9 Realities The 9 Strengths and Weaknesses The 12 Components of Healing The 12 Forms of Intimacy - in OMW - Intimacy and me, Feb 2014 - Here's a summarized version The 12 Agreements The 12 Positons in The Support Circle
  5. 25 points
    Ok, you CANNOT write that without some elaboration! LOL
  6. 23 points
    Yay!! From a private session May 2018: Michael: "Practice allowing yourself a day of complete freedom and permission to let that day be yours. You do not have to be immobile or hurting or in pain for you to focus on you."
  7. 22 points
    That Convergence for revitalizing social connections is well-timed. Surely humanity's collective consciousness is aware that the series finale of Game of Thrones is on the 19th, and that many people will be gathering together to watch it.
  8. 22 points
    This year has been rough so far so the Energy Shift is good news. The sentence I will try to carry in my head this month: “As you navigate May, enjoy your moments of calm and embrace your moments of power.”
  9. 22 points
    I'm sorry to hear you had to go through this struggle this year. I can't imagine how stressful living without health care is, especially with a chronic illness. So I'm super happy to hear that you got it back now and have at least the psychological weight of that off of your shoulders. Living with the weight of having an illness that is considered terminal is hard enough, you shouldn't have to worry about being able to treat whatever pops up along the way on top of that. I hope this also will help you to get a grip of your depression and slowely move out of that crippling state. I'm so happy this Nexus paid off big time for you! Sending you a big, fat hug, @Troy! Love you heaps!
  10. 21 points
    You ever feel like Michael is talking directly to you in some of these Energy Reports? This was one for me. Like, they might've well inserted my name in some parts. I ranted here already about my bout with influenza and pneumonia, so I can relate to the "deep and personal reflection" part. It felt like I underwent a big shift with that sickness which has kept since recovering. I still "want what I want" and deeply, but I've noticed a surprising decrease in obsessiveness about it - a calmness and neutrality that I haven't feel in a long time. ..and I thought that it would pass, but it's still here, so I am cautiously optimistic that this shift is here to stay. In short, I've been feeling much more present, but with that, the permission to do so. I've always been so anxious and worried about the future, but it's like I've given myself permission to finally lighten the load I've been carrying. My last Platform was "Purging," and Michael said it was all about lightening that load. I think being that sick was a physical manifestation of that purging and lightening the load. It came right at the end of my Platform year. ..so I'm interested to see what this next Platform could bring. An aside, as of May 2nd, Uranus had been making an exact conjunction to my Midheaven (3 degrees Taurus), so I wonder if there is any correlation there. Anyone else feeling this level of intensiveness with personal reflection?
  11. 20 points
    Reading through all of these updates, I'm hoping the May 18th Nexus brings some relief! I've been feeling better than usual, all being said, but like many of you, there is this undercurrent of grief and existential ennui. Until this fuckface is out of office and all of his supporters are forced to crawl back under their rocks, I don't think I will be clean of this oil of depression that seems to coat everything. Some of you are talking about personal events in your lives having similar effects, but I have a feeling that those personal events would not be so overwhelming or challenging if world events were on an upswing instead of seeming to be steadily declining. Hang in there, everyone. We got this.
  12. 20 points
    Ha! I had my moment of clarifying boundaries at the end of April. Did this with an entity mate and she was not pleased in the slightest. Currently isn’t speaking to me anymore but I remember the sense of utter relief I felt when I set that boundary. I know I made the right choice for me. So so tired all the time now lol but school’s ending so time for some R&R for a while.
  13. 20 points
    This item was written by Troy and posted on the TLE Yahoo list on November 14, 2001. Note: The 'site Glossary' mentioned refers to an older version of TLE and does not (yet) exist on this site. Someone recently asked about FREQUENCY. I thought I'd post this from the site Glossary: Frequency: A point that represents a vibration within a spectrum of vibrations. There are many kinds of frequencies, but the main one this term is used for in the Michael Teachings is the one that represents your individual frequency within the range of Human Sentience. There are also frequencies that include the whole range of Sentience throughout a planet, or throughout a Universe. This concept is similar to isolating the VISIBLE color spectrum Frequency and identifying the color RED (as we isolate the HUMAN Frequency within Sentience), even though there are more colors within the Frequency range, such as Ultraviolet and Infrared. Although there are these variations of where to focus a range, Frequency as used in the Michael Teachings is similar to limiting to only the visible spectrum, as it refers to Human Sentience within ALL Sentience, within ALL things. AND MORE: FREQUENCY: This is the exact point on a band of frequency that encompasses our Sentience as Human. Your frequency is how your Essence relates to and processes the energy of your environments, whether physical or non-physical. The universe ranges from very low frequencies, like rocks and mountains, to very high frequencies, like thoughts. Sentience (or souls) also have a range of frequency and vibration. That is what the Frequency in a chart from Michael refers to. In the same way that a thought is no better than a rock, neither is a low or high frequency soul any better or worse. "Higher" or "Lower" is not literal and has nothing to do with being better or worse. When you know what frequency you have as an Essence, this gives you a picture of how your Essence likes to take in life, how it likes to relate to its journey through experiences. An Essence with a HIGH Frequency (%65+) tends take in life at a faster pace, processing events swiftly. The plus of this is that they can move through experiences, gather what they want, and move on. The downside is that the Personality might just scan an event, missing all the important parts, then repeat it over and over in different forms until the "lesson" the Essence sought is learned. Those with a High Frequency can literally store unprocessed events and experiences as a vibrational pattern in their cells. When under stress or when the occasion arises, they can then "create" the same situation with new players and settings easily, until they get what the "lessons" are about for them. Only that individual can determine when they are "done" with a pattern; it is not imposed on them. An Essence with a LOW frequency (%35-) tends to take in life very detailed and tediously, processing it slowly. The plus of this is in that they can indulge completely in an experience in one trip, wringing it for all it's worth, never needing to go back. The downside is that the Personality can sometimes resist an experience, and since their frequency is more solid, the events begin to settle into the body as ailments or illnesses. From there, Essence can process the basic energy of the denied event by dealing with its personal physical elements, but this isn't any fun for the Personality! MORE ON FREQUENCY: Not only do we tend to gravitate toward events that match our frequency (more accurately, we filter events THROUGH the frequency), we also relate to and filter other Essences and Personalities through the Frequency. In a room full of people you will feel more comfortable with people within about 20 of your own frequency point. So if you have, let's say, a frequency of 62, you will relate to, communicate with, and generally find resonance with those up to 82 and as low as 42. Being with someone outside of that range can be very challenging. This isn't that limiting considering that another Essence can also fluctuate as well, raising or lowering their own Frequency to work with you. So, let's say that other person has a Frequency of 35. They can then raise to about 55 on their scale to find a comfortable common point! But, what if that person's Frequency is 19 and can only go as high as 39? Well, anything where there is a gap usually requires a balancing factor of some sort, such as a third person with a frequency that accommodates both, acting as a conduit of mediator. This helps bring more people together! Even an event can act as a common point between two who have a gap in their Frequency points, such as a spiritual pursuit, games, common goals, etc. An interesting note: In a room full of people the frequencies of all will gravitate toward a common denominator. Another interesting note is that during our teens, particularly in a school setting, we tend to go through a rigidity in our frequency. It is at this point we are most inflexible and tend to just remain within only a few degrees of our own frequency point.
  14. 19 points
    Troy, thank you for our report. I was just sitting here thinking about how much I appreciate you @Troy.
  15. 19 points
    This is really powerful and meaningful to know. Thank you for sharing that. And please, never ever take our input and help with refining your posts or interpretations or formatting, or whatever... as anything more than exactly what it is. I want to encourage everyone and anyone to be as enthusiastic and as studious as you can be, so those suggestions and directions are only meant to help both you and the community. It's all love. Glad you survived those rough patches, Kurtis. You are very loved around here.
  16. 18 points
    Try this one: Michael Speaks: Mother and Child and the 1st Internal Monad. The Essence manages development of the body it will inhabit but does not enter until first breath. I'm sure I'm speaking to the choir but these abortion laws have nothing at all to do with the "sanctity" of life and everything to do with controlling women. I recently joined Supermajority: "Supermajority is a new home for women's activism, training and mobilizing a multiracial, intergenerational community that will fight for gender equity together." They are still accepting Founding Members (Supermajority)
  17. 18 points
    I've been doing some serious "Marie Kondo'ing" of my space lately - in fact, I have a friend coming over to help tomorrow! I have a bag from Thred Up ready to fill! - and one of her catchphrases is, "does this spark joy?" And if it doesn't, out it goes! I am trying to do some spring cleaning of my environment and myself so that more room is there for joyful things and attitudes and people. (and cats, but cats ALWAYS spark joy for me)
  18. 17 points
    This article was written by Troy in dialog with Michael and posted to the Yahoo list on October 23, 2001. Updates and clarifications are appended and were posted on October 26, 2001. BODY TYPES Part Two: Progressions and Transmutations Now that we have a working knowledge of the basic Body Types, let's find ways we can apply this information. PROGRESSIONS The progression of the Body Types is as follows: Lunar (1) > Venus (7) > Mercury (2) > Saturnine (6) > Martial (3) > Jovial (5) [Solar (4)] Within a lifetime, the Body Type will "peak," then "progress." The Body Type is inherently a part of the life from birth, but as the body grows, the specific Body Type Configuration will become more evident in Appearance, Nature, and Health. Each person has a personal Peak and Progression Point that is personal to them. Progression of a Body Type can move as much as 30% within a lifetime. The percentages, naturally, will rise for those Planetary Influences being progressed TOWARD, while the Planetary Influence being progressed FROM will lower. Those Planetary Influences that act as conduits for shifts may or may not change in percentage of influence. NOTE: If you have your Body Type channeled or figured out, your Body Type Configuration should have two or more of the Planetary Influences IN SEQUENCE. For instance, your Body Type might be Saturn/Mercury/Venus in varying percentages because this reflects the consistent progression through the influences (Venus>Mercury>Saturn). There should be NO Saturn/Venus/Jovial, for example, because the consistency is lost and the Body Type channeled is invalid. If I, or any other channel, received something inconsistent from the flow listed above, then please take a moment to determine your valid Body Type. AN EXCEPTION is if you have SOLAR as part of your Body Type. Solar is used as a pivotal influence to move to any other planetary influence in the progression. TRANSMUTATIONS Movement does not just occur through the Body Types, but also through the Primary Aspects: Appearance Energy transmutes and is allotted to influence Nature Nature Energy transmutes and is allotted to influence Health Health Energy transmutes and is allotted to influence Appearance This is INDEPENDENT from the sequential progression of Planets. For example: Saturn may progress toward Mars, but if Saturn is the Primary Nature and there is a shift in Saturn's influence at all, that energy will move to whatever planet is influencing Health. NOTE: It is not necessarily a percentage that actually moves, but a shift in energy is proportionally allotted to Primary Aspects. A DETAILED EXAMPLE Let's follow an example for both Planetary Progression and Aspect Progression. We will look at Planetary Progression first. Let's say a person is 45% Saturnine, 40% Mercury, and 15% Venus. This person has determined that Saturn is their Primary Appearance, Mercury is their Primary Nature, and Venus is their Primary Health. Let's say within the lifespan, this person progresses the full 30%. What you would find is an INCREASE FROM Mercury and Venus, because the progression occurs TOWARD Saturn. Venus will diminish completely, moving its 15% TOWARD Mercury over time. ALL INFLUENCES MOVE SIMULTANEOUSLY, so at the point where Venus diminishes and Mercury has compensated by moving equal energy of progression toward Saturn, then the Body Type Configuration at that point would be 60% Saturn, 40% Mercury. This would be a simple example. Don't forget though, within the lifetime this person, as an example, progresses the full 30%. We've accounted for 15% so far. Upon reaching approximately 60% of a single planetary influence, the Body Type will USUALLY begin progressing toward the NEXT Body Type. This Body Type configuration could then progress toward Martial OR Solar, since Solar is Neutral and can be progressed TO and FROM at any point in the progression. By the time this life ended, the Body Type Configuration could be 15% Solar (or Martial), 45% Saturn, 40% Mercury, OR 10% Solar (or Martial), 50% Saturn, 40% Mercury, OR any consistent variation of that. A unique trait of Solar is that it can act as a "bridge" to ANY other planetary influence. It is rare to choose this, but this does occur. As an example, continuing from the example above, the Configuration COULD progress to: 5% [insert planetary influence], 5% Solar, 50% Saturn, 40% Mercury (or some variation). Most people at least let the Solar get to around 60% before progressing, but it isn't a rule, of course. The Aspects have progressed, too, so let's look at how that might happen. Remember: Appearance Energy shifts are transmuted and allotted to influence Nature; Nature Energy transmutes and is allotted to influence Health; Health Energy transmutes and is allotted to influence Appearance. This is INDEPENDENT from the sequential progression of Planets. AGAIN NOTE: It is not the percentage that actually moves, but a shift in energy at all will shift proportionally as influences allotted to Primary Aspects. We said this person has determined that Saturn is their Primary Appearance, Mercury is their Primary Nature, and Venus is their Primary Health. Although the influences can overlap because the body is one entity, we can at least say these are the accurate Primary Aspects. This person may have a very rugged, tall, angular Appearance and a very witty, caustic, talkative Nature. The Health Aspect may or may not be obvious, but you could say this person may have very healthy bone structure, or bone troubles. Considering that Venus is the minority of influence and will be fading as the life progresses, most, if any, Parathyroid problems would be evident by the Peak of the Body Type, especially since after the Peak, the Venusian influences will diminish. For simplicity, let's go with the Progression toward Martial and leave Solar out, using the final Configuration of 10% Martial, 50% Saturn, 40% Mercury. Since Venus was determined to be the Health Aspect and it is diminishing as an influence, the Health Aspect will be carried by the Progression toward Saturn, since Health progresses toward Appearance, and Saturn is the planet influencing Appearance. This means, any Health challenges or strengths will now be mostly influenced by Saturn. This could translate into possibly having a long, full sexual life, and great health stamina, or a dysfunction of the sexual organs and potential cancer or some other over-stimulated growth in the body. Since Saturn's original influence has moved toward Martial, and Saturn was determined to be Appearance, the energy shift to Martial will be in Nature. That means this person, as they get older, may become slightly more Martial in behavior, being quicker to anger, having lots of energy, and being over-all fiery. Now remember, Mercury is still a highly influential factor on the Aspect of Nature and still Primary. This planet's influence on that Aspect has not shifted in percentage at all in this Configuration, though its energy has had to Progress proportionally. This person would then still be very Mercurial in Nature, with a seemingly new spicy edge to them because of the Martial influences on Nature added. Any transmutation from the Aspect of Nature (primarily Mercury) to Health (primarily Venus) has by default been moved to Saturn's influence because Health (which WAS primarily Venus) has progressed to Appearance (primarily Saturn). To diagram this: We started with 45% Saturnine (Primary Appearance). Saturn progresses sequentially to Mars. Energy moved from Primary Appearance transmutes to an influence on Nature (Mercury). Mars is incorporated as a 10% influence. Since Energy transmuted from Appearance (primarily Saturn), and Appearance Energy transmutes to influence Nature, Mars is assigned as an influence on Nature. (Note: If Saturn had been a Primary Influence on Health, Mars would be assigned an influence on Appearance, since Energy from Health transmutes to influence Appearance. If Saturn had been a Primary influence on Nature, the transmutation would be toward Health.) We started with 15% Venus (Primary Health). Venus progresses sequentially to Mercury. All 15% from Venus is progressed to Mercury. Energy shifts from Primary Health (Venus) transmutes in allotment as an influence to Primary Appearance (Saturn). Energy from Health is transmuted to Saturn's influence on Appearance. We started with 40% Mercury (Primary Nature). Mercury progresses sequentially to Saturn. The progression of Venus to Mercury simply moved that 15% from Venus proportionally to Saturn, maintaining Mercury's 40%. Energy shifts in Primary Nature (Mercury) transmutes and is allotted to Health (Venus). NOTE: The energy shift from Nature (Mercury) moved to Venus (Health), but over time, even that transmuted again as Venus' energy progressed to Mercury, freeing that influence from Health to Appearance. Remember that all of this happens GRADUALLY over the lifetime. CLARIFICATION You already know of the Progressions from Planetary Influence to Planetary Influence: Lunar (1) > Venus (7) > Mercury (2) > Saturnine (6) > Martial (3) > Jovial(5) [Solar (4)] <<"bridge" Think of these Progressive in sequence, so if you have a Martial/Jovial Body Type, you are most likely moving toward Lunar, etc. You already know of the Transmutations: Appearance to Nature Nature to Health Health to Appearance INDEPENDENTLY from Progressions, the Transmutations take place. Think of it this way: Your Appearance is going to change as you grow older. That much you can count on. Where does Appearance transmute to? Based on your Appearance, you begin to BEHAVE in certain ways. Thus, your Appearance AFFECTS your NATURE. As your Nature changes, your attitudes shift and flux. So what do moods and perceptions and behavior affect? YOUR HEALTH! As your Health shifts and changes, what does it affect? You got it! YOUR APPEARANCE! As you grow, variations will occur in your Nature, Appearance, and Health, so that is the Triad which creates the dynamic of being Physical. The Connection between the Progressions of Planetary Influence and Transmutations is only in the potential for new Planets to affect you in some way, or the release of a Planet's Influence. To determine what Planet has more influence over which of the Triad of Appearance, Nature, and Health, start with APPEARANCE. It should be easiest to see what has a stronger influence over your actual looks. Then figure in your basic motor behavior. How do you behave? Then assume the rest is influencing your Health. If you are over 50, you might check Health next, then Nature. Remember, though, that these influences are NOT exclusive to one influence or another; they are interlaced, but you can see where you are influenced MOST FROM. Remember, the Triad is not necessarily sequential or parallel to the Planetary Progression. One more easy way to see all of this is to think of the Planetary Progressions as the Train Track, tracking the addition/subtraction of "cars" on the track, while the shifts in the Triad are passengers who are Doctors (Health), Psychologists (Nature), and Make-up Team Members (Appearance), moving around in the Cars. LISA SAID: Other than that, I kinda get it. I found it easier to understand once I made little circles and put arrows going round it and labeling them with the planets and another circle with the 3 aspects. Handy little visual aid for me. TROY: PERFECT! I would have loved to have included a visual, but alas, I am all text.
  19. 17 points
    I'm happy for you! Having gone through a severely depressing and debilitating 2018, I can now better understand and empathize with those undergoing health complications. I pretty much hate most of our economic and social norms, so I'm glad that there are at least some people and groups that make an effort to help the disenfranchised. Btw, as I've said before, I'm extremely thankful for this site you and Michael have created. The info here has saved me from spiraling into self-destruction numerous times. While reading this it dawned on me that perhaps you have a Solar Health body type? Your profile says you only have Venus and Mercury but I'd be inclined to consider Solar Health too: From a library article: "MEntity: Your Tertiary Body Type is Solar, and this is directly linked to your Thymus as a medium of processing the status of your entire Being, in general. The Thymus is directly linked to immunity, and by extension to your overall state of self-esteem. This planetary influence in the tertiary realm usually shows up as someone who "never gets sick," but does tend to carry chronic issues for some length of time, or when they get sick, they "really get sick." More than other body types, this influence is an almost "real-time" reflection of where one is in terms of self-esteem, trust, and confidence in various areas of the life." From another library article: "MEntity: When Solar is involved there tends to be quite an extreme boost of longevity and strength of health, but this is often met with more extreme dips into health concerns, if there are any. For any concerns regarding health, then, one of the first considerations would be the immune system. Anything that boosters the immune system will be of benefit, of course, but in particular for those with Solar who have come to depend on fairly stable health for so long. And when those with Solar show any symptoms, the quicker to address those symptoms the better."
  20. 16 points
    thank you @Troy!! Yes, I also saw myself clearly in this report. And today I felt relieved!! The energy shift brought me some of that grounding TOGETHER, WE STAND; TOGETHER, WE SIT How synchronistic. Today I went to a holistic fair and we did a nice meditation. We literally sat and stood together at different times, moved through the space, also we looked at our partners eyes for some minutes, it was very healing and intimate @Ingun I hope you feel better soon! please take lots of good care!!
  21. 16 points
    Wow, I have had multiple moments this month where I was just like “ fuck it” This is very out of character for me because I scrutinize EVERYTHING and overthink EVERYTHING. After meditation I usually get more confused because I notice my thoughts just arise and I have no control over the good ones or the ugly ones. Post meditation usually leaves me in a state of “ what’s the point if I am nothing but thoughts that I don’t even create?”. This week though I get to that place and still have no concept of “ who I AM” but I feel more like “ Fuck it, I don’t know who I am or where thoughts come from or if I have free will but I am going to live like I do anyway. Fuck it.” I am called towards writing and deeply inspired by songwriters who just pour their humanness out there with no deep spiritual intention or grand purpose. Just this underlying ownership and knowing that their voice matters. I feel exhausted by all these years of waiting to figure myself out before I make my move. I feel exhausted by thinking what I create has to be important to anyone else. I feel like there is such a power in just living like you matter and I am feeling this report.
  22. 16 points
    I think I did write about this at one time... somewhere. Maybe not. If not, I should write up a blog post about it. For years I felt it was way too personal and too outrageously surreal to mean anything to anyone else, but time has passed and now I feel it can be shared more. It's probably about as interesting as a dream, but I will share it sometime.
  23. 15 points
    Note from TeamTLE: As part of the TLE Books project, TeamTLE agreed that this session needed to be completed, providing content for all Chief Features. On May 3, 2019, we started the project to do just that. This transcript contains the original material as duplicated from the 2014 session, but new material after the original session has been added, and material received today is in blue text within the transcript. Some editing has been done to smooth out transitions. Essentially, this version of the transcript is the working version of the content intended to be published. Michael Speaks Live "Transforming Chief Features" May 25, 2014 Channel: Troy Tolley MEntity: Hello to each of you. We are here, now. We can begin. We have had much to say about the subject of the Chief Negative Features, and much more can be said, of course, so what we will offer up today is not definitive, but simply more to consider as you work to understand and embrace your fears, transforming them away from being obstacles and paralysis to being informative and helpful. Fear was never "meant" to be a challenge or something to undermine any fragment's life, but much like anything that exists, it is a tool that can become a pivotal resource toward Agape or a restrictive halt away from everything. Fear, or the Chief Negative Features, are inherently "negative" because they describe the gap between "you" and "other," or "something else." Anything inherently divisive is "negative" in our teaching, but this does not mean it is inherently "bad." Fear is inherent in Personality because Personality is inherently divided from all other things and people, and even from Essence in many ways. From the moment one is born, the first, most primal fear is born along with you: the fear of non-attachment. This fear is biological. It is what keeps "you" alive. It is what clings to the mother, to the caretaker, what keeps the toddler close to the camp, to the tribe, and attached to its resources. It is what keeps the body searching for foods, for water, for tools, etc. Anything that is necessary for survival. So, fear is quite "good" in that regard. Any threat to the attachment of the biological self to its resources is highlighted and avoided, either by fight or flight. Keep this in mind as you explore your own Chief Features, then, because at the heart of everyone's fears, it is this struggle with non-attachment that is key. We will elaborate further upon that consideration as we explore the subject, if time permits. For today's focus, we understand that the interest is in the various ways one can consciously make choices in behavior so as to relieve the effects of a particular fear, or Chief Feature. The point of transforming your relationship to fear is because when fear is informative, it is simply a means of enhancing your capacity to choose. It is not much different from any warning system built in to any vehicle that alerts you as to when you may be in close proximity to a collision. It would not make sense to argue that warning systems are removed from vehicles because the mere presence of those alerts implies something is wrong, flawed, or bad. That warning system is an advantage that increases the capacity for choice, for better navigation, for success in one's direction and endeavors. However, when most struggle with the Chief Features as an issue, it is because the "warning system" goes off randomly, goes off without relevance, goes off constantly, etc. It is no longer associated with an actual threat, or with information. Imagine the difference between enjoying a walk through the woods, watching the birds, the creatures, enjoying the sunlight, the babbling brook, your thoughts, and then noticing a bear in the distance to which you then steer clear of in a smart way, as compared to a walk in the woods where you presume that every twig cracking and every shadow is a bear. Both of these methods are helpful for keeping you alert to bears, but one keeps you from noticing pretty much anything else. If one's "warning system" is random, constant, or irrelevant, then that warning system becomes useless for navigation, and simply keeps you on one end of the spectrum of life. It keeps you on the side of "Being Alive" vs "Living." We will speak of each of the Chief Features now, with a brief synopsis, and then a list of methods for how one can use his or her consciousness to transform that fear so that one is not just being alive, but can live again, so to speak. Synopsis of Self-Deprecation and Arrogance SELF-DEPRECATION and ARROGANCE are attachments to how one defines one's self. Self-Deprecation is the fear of NOT BEING ENOUGH, while Arrogance is the fear of BEING TOO MUCH. Self-deprecation fears not being seen clearly, while Arrogance fears being seen too clearly. Self-deprecation finds its scraps of self-esteem in being first to the punch for cutting himself or herself down. This is Self-deprecation's way of protecting the self from being invisible or feeling invisible or incompetent. The defense here is that if the individual can call out or showcase his or her own flaws first, then it is a way to show that he or she is on board with what they presume you will undoubtedly see, or are seeing already. It is the only way they know how to be seen: through the lens of failures, flaws, insecurities, and doubts. Arrogance, on the other hand, tries to protect its self-esteem by creating as protective a veneer as possible, hiding his or her insecurities behind a persona of false-confidence, offense, and defense. Since there is very little self-esteem here, it must be protected at all costs, often by deflecting through pointing out someone else's flaws or incompetence. It is the only way they know how to keep any sense of self-esteem, by pretending that it exists in greater quantities than it does. Self-deprecation points out its own flaws, and Arrogance points out yours. Self-Deprecation The 7 Angles of Behavior for help in transforming Self-deprecation might be: 1. YOU ARE NOT IN TROUBLE For those who struggle with Self-deprecation, there can often be a haunting sense of constantly being on the verge of being caught, being called out, humiliated, made to be an example, or "in trouble." Even when there is nothing to warrant such concerns. And even more so when there is such a need for concern. Allow for failure, for being incompetent, and build on your experiences so that you can learn, or make choices to pursue other directions. If your only concern is whether you will be in trouble, or not, then you will never truly be your best. 2. YOUR BEST MAY NOT BE THE BEST There are going to be times when you do not meet the expectations of others, or yourself. And the very best that you can do may not be the best that someone else can do. That is a fact of existence. Embrace this and allow kindness as a process in your improvement, or as a part of your freedom to pursue your strengths. 3. CLEAN YOUR CONSCIENCE That is not a typo. We speak to the necessity for those in Self-deprecation to CLEAN their conscience. By this we mean that the individual take time to note just how much clutter is in the mind that is from the past, buried like shallow graves, gathered there like a cemetery of failures and flaws, ready to be dug up at a moment's notice. It is important that those in Self-deprecation regularly look at these experiences as a PART of who they are, and not defining who they are. CLEAN your conscience of these metaphorical graves and begin to make room for life, for living things to grow there. Let the failures of the past act as fertilizer, if you will, rather than preserved as some sort of trophy that makes up for competence. 4. CLEAN YOUR ENVIRONMENT In addition to the clutter of the mind, those in Self-deprecation can fall into clutter of their space, reflecting the building debris of flaws, failures, failed expectations, etc. For those with Self-deprecation, there can be a high tolerance for clutter, and this can be reflective of the tolerance for the the clutter in the mind, heart, and body. A regular effort to clean, organize, and experience one's space helps to clean, organize, and experience one's self. Attention to personal hygiene is important here, too. Those in Self-deprecation may not "smell" as a result of lacking personal hygiene, but they may very well skip on certain routines of care for the body that would help them to transform the sense of invisibility and inadequacy into self-nurturing and personal attentiveness. 5. CARE FOR YOURSELF Do not presume that someone else needs to, or should, or could do this for you. Care for yourself in as many ways you can in a day. Give yourself good food, good entertainment, good bathing, good hygiene, kindness, patience, etc. 6. STOP APOLOGIZING/EXCUSING As long as you constantly apologize for yourself, you are not being responsible for yourself. As long as you are making excuses, you are not being responsible. Apologies and excuses are deflection from responsibility. We are not speaking here in terms of the social courtesy of acknowledging grief, or acknowledging a slight, but apology and excuses as a buffer to protect from the ownership of response. 7. OWN YOURSELF By this we mean that you freely acknowledge your behaviors, your failures, your flaws, but respond to them through ownership, not as a way to deflect from further responsibility. When you apologize or offer excuses, you are reacting. You are not owning. When you own yourself, you can respond as opposed to react, and this is key to responsibility. AN ASIDE: Keep in mind that the Chief Features will not just show up as behaviors in yourself, but as behaviors you endure or attract in others, as well. Arrogance The 7 Angles of Behavior for transforming ARROGANCE might be: 1. NO ONE IS LOOKING For those in Arrogance, the fear that everyone is watching them is high. There is a keen sense that every move and choice and action is being scrutinized and of high relevance to others. In most cases, that is simply not true. No one is watching you. Most do not care if your hair is messed up, you stumbled, or if you are meeting your own standards or expectations. 2. CELEBRATE PRIVATELY For many in Arrogance, there is a compulsion to make it known to others every little success, to point out immediately a win, or to even "humblebrag," which is a self-congratulation tucked into a false self-deprecation. Allow yourself celebrate yourself with yourself. Your successes are just as real with or without being used as a means for defining yourself to others. See if you can embrace a success on your own without recruiting others to celebrate you. 3. CELEBRATE OTHERS Sometimes those in Arrogance can be so preoccupied with presuming everyone is watching them, that they forget to pay any meaningful attention to others. 4. LEAVE YOURSELF ALONE Those in Arrogance can be even harsher in self-criticism than those in Self-deprecation. Self-deprecation can slide into a quiet defeat, but Arrogance can be relentless. Many in Arrogance are their own worst bullies, if you will, taking on the voices of their past that criticized them, owning them so as to find some of their self-esteem in "siding" with this self-loathing. 5. LEAVE OTHERS ALONE Those in Arrogance can be of the worst bullies toward others, as well, actively or passively condescending in tone, words, behaviors, etc. If you find that you are talking down about another person, or yourself (see 4), behaving in a way that is not constructive, or helpful, but simply emphasizing flaws, then it may be time to look at how you are giving rise to voices of criticism that you carry about yourself. Criticism is helpful and meaningful, but not when only used as a means of deflection or protection. 6. EMBRACE EQUALITY By this we mean that while there will always be nuances among everyone and everything, with great gaps between common grounds, with some being better at some skills than others, or more socially celebrated than others, or even unfairly rewarded more than others, there is still profound relevance to the common ground of humanity and existence. In other words, allow comparisons to be informative, not defining. When you see or feel you are better than another, or that another is acting as if better than you, then remind yourself of as much that you share as possible. This does not mean you are not better at what you do than someone else might be, or that another person is not more attractive to more people than you may be, but let yourself have that which is equally true, as well. You do not have to pretend there are no differences, but do not pretend there are no similarities, either. 7. INVITE INTIMACY More than most other Chief Features, Arrogance will keep others at a distance, even as they often feign being very open and up front with you. Many in Arrogance will carefully construct a spectrum of revealing behaviors and expressions that others presume is all there is to know or see about that person, thus protecting the person in Arrogance from those who might otherwise pry. So it can be helpful for the person in Arrogance to take some responsibility and care in consciously inviting others to be close, not presuming that others will find their way, and then looking up and wondering where everyone is. Those in Arrogance can be of the loneliest people because they create the greatest moats of protection, but crave so desperately to be close at the same time. And so it can be helpful to actively invite intimacy, either in obvious ways such as literally asking for conversation, inviting to social events, etc, or by simply allowing the self to be present with another, listening, paying attention, and responding with care. Intimacy is not always about receiving attention, but about giving it. Due to the extensive elaboration on each of these Chief Features, we must suggest that this be broken up into a couple of sessions for delivery. We started with Self-deprecation and Arrogance, as these are most common for older souls, but we will have to elaborate upon the remaining Chief Features in another exchange. We will open the floor here for the next 15 minutes so that questions can be asked. FLOOR IS NOW OPEN [ViP] Is there any difference in how these Angles of Behavior should be interpreted or applied, based on whether the CF attempting to be transformed is primary, vs secondary, vs tertiary? MEntity: Each of the 7 Angles we offered would likely be relevant in any context, but one of the angles may be more relevant than others of that Chief Feature. [BrianW] Realizing there is not enough time to go over it in-depth, could you give a way to counteract the sliding of the negative poles of self-deprecation to self-destruction? MEntity: If Self-deprecation is sliding to Self-destruction, it would mean that it is, first, accessing Stubbornness. Self-deprecation cannot slide to Self-destruction otherwise. This means that Self-deprecation's Negative Pole of Self-abasement is sliding to Stubbornness' Negative Pole of Obstinance, and then over to Self-destruction's Suicide. When that is the case, it is likely that the Personality has decided what is so awful about the self, then refuses to change in any way that could be beneficial, which then leads to a sense of complete waste of life. To help counteract this, one would need to slide to GREED's "positive" pole of APPETITE. Though no Chief Features is truly "positive," the positive poles do describe the path out of that Chief Feature. In this case, having an appetite for life again, an embrace of what one wants and needs, can greatly counter the sense that life is simply being wasted on the self. Once that sense of appetite for life is remotely available, more life can come, more living. And that matters, even if only on a day to day basis. [Mariusrehm] can it in any way be helpful to make others aware of what you think their features might be? is a certain amount of intimacy/closeness needed for them to not feel accused when that is addressed? or does everybody has to completely explore these things on their own? MEntity: Marius, it is often more helpful for you to know the Chief Features of others than for you to point them out to them. Pointing out the Chief Features of others is only helpful if there is a mutual agreement to allow for this. Trust is necessary here, and even then it can be tricky. Of course, it is your choice as to whether you do this for someone, and how you do it, but we can say from experience that it is true that meaningful common ground and trust is fairly vital for the "photographing" of another to be useful to them. By "photographing" we mean those moments when one would offer up a "snapshot" of a moment or behavior of another for consideration. In some cases, however, intervention may be necessary if a person is completely unaware. When intervention is offered, the one who is offering must be willing to endure the reactions, deflections, defenses, and denials that might come from the confrontation of the reality of one's harmful impact on the self or others. This must be considered carefully, if intervention is deemed necessary. If one is not to the extreme of necessity for intervention, then one's most effective means of inviting another to consider his or her Chief Feature is to simply ask if that person knows that his or her behavior has a particularly harmful or divisive effect. In that invitation through asking, you will likely see if there is any room for meaningful discussion, or if there will only be more of the same. [Tyrone] Mine can just be a yes or no type answer, I'm just suspicious: [Tyrone] Were each of these 7 angles you gave related to the Centering Parts? Or I guess more generally, related to the axes and cardinality/ordinality? [Tyrone] (I am currently thinking in the order you gave them: 1. Instinctive, 2. Intellect, 3. Emotion, 4. Moving, 5. Higher Int., 6. Higher Emot., 7. Higher Moving) MEntity: Correlations could certainly be made, though further elaboration may be necessary to point out how these resonate. [Tyrone] I guess just were you guys thinking along those lines when coming up with them MEntity: Everything we ever offer can be mapped in correlative terms. Today's information is not an exception. However, we are not certain as to the order that Troy "unpacked" the delivery, so we would not consider these static correlations as far as the sequence. We think they are close, though, if not already in the sequence you describe. [Kurtis] Hi Michael, I hope this fits in relatively good context with this discussion, but I've been noticing a difficulty in understanding Caution's -Phobia in comparison to the CFs. Could you elaborate or clarify the difference between these CFs and -Phobia? MEntity: All Negative Poles of any Overleaf will be hooked into Chief Features, so Phobia, for example, would hook into that person's Chief Feature. The same would be said for Ingratiation or Identification, as Negative Poles for Acceptance or Passion, respectively. In other words, the Negative Poles of an Overleaf are what activate Chief Features, not the other way around. Caution is a means of relating, or reaching the Goal, by refining one's thoughts and expression, so Deliberation is when one is able to carefully select a thought or expression as that means of relating or reaching the goal. Phobia comes in when the person begins to overanalyze, overthink, and can no longer refine his or her interpretations or expressions. This person becomes frightened of his own thinking. This, then, would trigger whatever Chief Feature has come to be habitual as a means to protect the self. But this inability to refine one's thoughts would come first. To clarify: this person's over-thinking starts to scare him, triggering his Chief Features. Do you see the difference? [Kurtis] Yes I definitely do [Kurtis] I've been meaning to ask this kind of question for a while now MEntity: We will conclude here for today, and continue this discussion into the other Chief Features. We know we have many students who are in Arrogance and Self-deprecation, so a good number of you can begin to consider how you can transform these, if you choose to do so. ### The original session ended here, but the remaining Chief Features were covered in later sessions. The Inspirational Chief Features Martyrdom The 7 Angles of Behavior for transforming MARTYRDOM might be: 1. NOT EVERYTHING NEEDS FIXING It is important for those in Martyrdom to remember that not everything needs to be fixed. 2. YOU ARE NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN FIX IT Even when something may need fixing, you are not always the one necessary for fixing it. 3. THE ONLY SPACE YOU OWN IS YOU For those in Martyrdom it can be a struggle to control the space around the self, but the self is the only boundary that is truly owned by you. You end where your skin ends. It is okay to expand into the space around you, but you cannot always control that space. 4. YOU ARE A SURVIVOR (not a victim) If you are alive, you are a survivor. It is undermining to your efforts to navigate life if you presume you are a victim, but it can be empowering to remind yourself that you are a survivor, that you care enough to continue, that your struggle does not define you, but guides you. 5. YOU ARE NOT THE ONLY SURVIVOR There are true victims in life, and true survivors. True victims have been harmed in ways that force the choices of life toward survival, but victimhood only exists to the extent that one resigns from making choices. Others are surviving along with you in life, and it can be helpful to reach out so that a network of strength can be built, instead of ignoring this survival bond. 6. YOU CAN SEE FURTHER THAN YOU THINK You may be dealing with survival and boundaries and control to the point where you seem to only be able to see what is in front of you, but you can see further than this. Look forward, look further, look beyond. There are truths and inspiration there that can help guide you. 7. BE NICE Those in Martyrdom can sometimes think it is justified to be difficult, to ignore boundaries, to uphold expectations and entitlement, to fault others for unhappiness, etc. And this often nurtures a license to be insensitive to others until someone is sensitive enough to break through and save you from your Martyrdom. No life needs to be perfect before being nice. And being nice brings a great wave of support and more valid control over the life than one might expect, and certainly in more effective ways than being difficult can bring. Impatience The 7 Angles of Behavior for transforming IMPATIENCE might be: 1. TAKE TIME OFF Separate yourself from the steady stream of influence time has over you, and move yourself into a position that is intended to be free, such as going for a nice walk, a night off to the movies, a meeting with a friend for conversation, etc. Anything that you would normally NOT do because you "do not have enough time," TO DO. 2. QUIET YOUR MIND Impatience can scramble your thinking process to such an extent that you are no longer effective, so it would do you well to SLOW DOWN your mind, your thinking, and find your quiet, internal space. This could be done in the shower, or in a bath, or any other moment you think of it. Simply relax your face, your jaw, feel the weight of your tongue in your mouth, the presence of your chest, and for a full handful of minutes from 3 to 30, JUST BE. This practice of BEING will allow you to come back to your moment with far more effectiveness. 3. EMBRACE ONE THING Impatience can often leave one feeling as if she must be on top of everything that is on the agenda, thus everything clamors for the attention of the priority spot. Instead of thinking of one thing causing the delay of another, it would do you well to think of your focus on one thing as an EMBRACE of that thing, much like your hugging of a child or puppy, knowing that you will happily and quickly hug the next child or puppy, as soon as you are done hugging one. This will help you to keep out intrusive thinking and distracted emotions. 4. USE YOUR BODY Impatience can often leave one feeling the burden of Time on the body, which can leave one ignoring the effectiveness of the body, leading to clumsiness and erratic behaviors or reactions. One of the greatest ways to use your body is to LISTEN. Most fragments who suffer from Impatience tend to presume the intent, meaning, and words of others who are communicating. There is rarely any patience for the act of LISTENING. Some who suffer from Impatience do not even realize how little they listen because they simply go deaf to the outside world, so to speak, but have learned to speak for everyone around them so effectively they think their own words are those of others'. Taking a moment to ask if you are LISTENING can help you to come back to the moment and actually make more effective decisions and responses in the moment. 5. CREATE PATTERNS Impatience usually drives an individual into patterns that are comforting, rather than productive. When one is in impatience, and creating only comfort patterns, there still must be a sense of proof for the use of Time, so this leads to lying to oneself, lying to others, so that the time appears to have been met with enough challenge to validate ones existence, or one will escape into routines that are simply "going nowhere." Patterns are perfectly valid, but when one is Impatient, these patterns can move into entropy, so one must bring an awareness to the process of one's patterns and ask if they are being CREATED, or if they are merely being fulfilled. Make a simple change as a means to create or alter a pattern and the results can often be rather amazing. 6. PRESENCE Though we have mentioned this already, it is worth pointing out as its own concern, to be PRESENT. Those afflicted with Impatience are often NOT where they are in time. They are often somewhere else, such as an elusive future, or a sentimental past. It would do you well to practice being present when you are doing something. To do so would mean to be fully aware that your actions are being driven by your choice, and that your skin, your hands, your face, your body, Personality, are all on board for the moment, even if you would rather be doing something else. The more you escape the moment, the less you can bring change to your momentum. 7. LAUGH AT TIME By this we mean to point out that Time has very little to do with your life beyond your experience and interpretation of it. If you can find the humor and heart in your relationship to Time, you can find it as an ally, instead of as an oppressive dictator. Laughing at Time can mean finding fun things to do, playful things to do, meaningless and pointless things to do, as long as you enjoy them and they help you to lose your focus on time. In doing so, you can begin to help your Personality and Body to see just how little REALITY there is time beyond your use of the moment, and your interpretation of that. The Action Chief Features Self-Destruction (still to come) Greed The 7 Angles of Behavior for transforming GREED might be: 1. GIVE MORE This may seem like a dramatic and even anti-intuitive position to take when dealing with Greed, but it is important to remember that Greed is not about what you truly lack. It is about what you FEAR to lack. In most cases of Greed, the emphasis of that Greed is on something that one already has, but one wants more. To help transform Greed, one of the first things you can do is to give more of what you wish to receive. The reason this works is because you then put into tangible action the very thing you feel you are missing and when you see others receive this from you, it reminds you of what you have. 2. CREATE/MAKE MORE Again, this may feel counter to the fear of lack, but there is almost always a way to create/make more of what you feel you lack when in Greed. 3. DO LESS Greed can prompt and trigger a person to take from others and even destroy that which they lack if it is seen to be in abundance for others. It can be helpful to remember not to take action, to strike out, or do anything that jeopardize the existence of that which you lack, or those who hold it. It is not always necessary to act on your compulsions to secure that which you feel you lack. 4. NO ONE CARES ABOUT WHAT YOU OWN It may seem that others care about what you own or have, but they do not. Even those who express envy or jealousy or admiration are not doing so because you own something they want. They are envious, jealous, or admiring because they may have their own value of presence tied into objects like you do. Having more does not make you more. 5. ENCOURAGE ABUNDANCE Specifically, encourage abundance for others, even as you struggle with your own. One of the most effective ways to help shift away from Greed is to celebrate triumphs, successes, and benefit that others are receiving because this helps clear the path to your own abundance. 6. LET YOURSELF HAVE WHAT YOU HAVE It is often the case that those in Greed tend to completely miss what they have in terms of abundance and well-being and material security and affection and love, etc., when all they can focus on is a compulsion to take more. Let yourself have what you have and this helps more of that to generate in your life. 7. USE WHAT YOU HAVE, WISELY It is often the case that one's Greed might be triggered by legitimate threats to a resource in the life. Greed is never truly about lacking what you lack, but about wanting more of what you already have. If you find that you have very little of something that you want more of, it can help for you to use what you have, wisely. Love more wisely. Spend more wisely. Care for others more wisely. This helps you to extract the depth in what you already have, rather than to render what you have as diminished or shallowed or hollowed. Neutral Chief Feature: Stubbornness 1. MOVE A LITTLE MORE Just when you think you have reached a point where you are certain, sure, and conclusively confident in your position, consider moving just a little more. Treat this as a curiosity, not as a concession. Treat this as an opportunity for true confidence, not defensive confidence. 2. SAY NO TO NO More often than not, if Stubbornness is in effect, there is some form of protection against change or the unknown being upheld by emphasizing the "NO" in your life. Allow yourself the comfort of NO, but by using it to help dismantle its stronghold against your even considering a YES. One way to do this is by using the phrase NOT YET, as in, you are still ready with your NO, but NOT YET. When you immediately wish to say No, say No, Not Yet. And give some breathing room for the chance to say Yes. 3. TELL THE TRUTH Stubbornness often prompts you to tell lies to yourself and to others about why you resist or reject change or moving into uncertainty or the unknown. These can show up as excuses, evasive language, sometimes to the point of having become an art. To help dismantle the fear of change, you have to tell the truth, speak up about what you want, what you need, and what you do not want or do not need. Stubbornness is often prompted because you have not owned the responsibility of your own authority over your life, so you learn to make excuses. Sometimes, all one must do is speak up and be present as a way of navigating uncertainty, rather than hiding and evading. 4. TRUST YOURSELF Stubbornness can close one down to any new input and block any consideration of new experience or new information because if that new information or experience encourages you to change or expand, then you lose your sense of self that you have grown to protect so carefully. But who you grow to be is built from you, and is not a replacement of you. Trust not only who you feel you are now, but who you are in the next moment. You do not lose yourself when you change, and you do not lose yourself in change. You will always be you. 5. SHARE AUTHORITY Stubbornness often prompts one to interpret any source of authority or input or nudge to your life as an invasive maneuver out to challenge your comfort levels and peace of mind or even as a challenge to your own authority over your life. Sometimes that may be the case, but most often it is not. So when you feel yourself being triggered by what you see as someone trying to be smarter, trying to tell you what to do, trying to say you are wrong, trying to push you, remember that you do not have to constantly fight this source of authority, you can remember to share in that authority. In other words, no matter how much smarter, right, advanced, experienced, etc. another person may be, you are on equal ground in terms of the authority over your life. These individuals are authorities in their own life and they may be better at some things than you are, and you may be better in other things. Listen, learn, and share. Sometimes this is a one-way experience and then you must embrace this as a gift, not an imposition. 6. DIE EVERY DAY Practice experiencing each day as new, rather than as a continuation of the day before. Do not just dive into the new day, but Die into the new day. No matter how similar the days may be, wake up to one new thing, even if it is a small thing. Wake up to a moment of perfect temperature and nostalgic breeze. Wake up to a nice memory in the middle of the day. Wake up to a kind gesture, or a funny moment. You live many many lifetimes and from the point of view of Stubbornness, it would convince you that they are all alike, nothing really changes, and put you to sleep against your evolution. But every lifetime is new. Every lifetime is different. And every day is new. 7. BE WRONG One of the most entrenching states that Stubbornness can get into is the enduring insistence that one must be right, must not fail, must not be challenged, and this means one MUST NOT MOVE. This circles back to the first point to move a little more, but sometimes that move has to be in the willingness to be wrong, to embrace mistakes, to embrace a challenge. You do not even have to be wrong to be wrong. What we mean by this is that you may be right on many levels, but if someone else decides you are wrong, sometimes that has to be okay. Note: Two different sessions included the question about the 7 Angles of Behavior to cope with Stubbornness. See Membership Gratitude Event: July 2016 for an alternate version.
  24. 15 points
    Big sigh. Thank you, @Troy
  25. 15 points
    UPDATE: I ended up having such a great weekend, and it was such a delight to see the world sharing in their joy over Avengers: Endgame and that amazing Game of Thrones episode. So not only had I taken the day to enjoy life, but seeing the world delight in something together was a perfect addition to the day. It was just beautiful for me to see the world talking in awe and reverence for something they enjoyed so much. It was great to see that we can work on the difficult things together and still make time and room for the things we love and enjoy together. I look forward to more of this!
  26. 15 points
    Oh my god! I knew you had some health issues but I didn't realize it was to this extent. I salute you for not losing your absolute shit as you were going through this all year. I'm so glad that relief is on the horizon and you're doing better. You're so loved, Troy!
  27. 15 points
    (((Troy))) I'm so sorry you went through those feelings of uncertainty alone, but very glad you have your healthcare back and don't have to carry that burden anymore. Thriving is much more exciting than surviving. Love you very much! PS: I'm also super curious to know more about when you "met" Michael!
  28. 15 points
    Well, nearly dying of pneumonia must have been traumatic, and I understand if you don't want to revisit that. BUT. This teasing cliffhanger is just so CRUEL to those of us who love cliffhangers. I would love to hear more about what this meeting was like. EDIT: just saw that Bobby posted almost the exact same thing. Lol. Team work.
  29. 15 points
    Troy, I am so glad your advocate was able to help you restore your healthcare! Sending you a big hug.
  30. 15 points
    Yea Troy, glad to hear you have your health care back!!! Makes me appreciate being Canadian, and not having that worry.
  31. 15 points
    @Troy Such great news! Big hugs and lots of love.
  32. 14 points
    I usually resonate to some degree with the reports, last month not so much, but yesterday the 4th I was feeling out of sorts and tired so getting the report and seeing it was a day to ground was validating. Now, the 18th-21st is intriguing because those are the exact dates I will be in London, a city I lived in for 2 years and left 30 years ago. I had some of the best times of my life there, a time when I was the most social I have ever been, a time when I laughed and danced and I'm curious to see how I and the city are both different after all this time. I will be alone so I'll be able to work on some emotional stuff and think about what might be from another parallel or how I can merge some of the "me" that was then because it does feel like an entire other life and not only because it was 30 years ago. I don't feel I've "hit the wall" yet but I have over the past couple of years worked through some of the issues about how society forces us to live and my QP is all about reclamation so maybe that won't be a thing for me.
  33. 14 points
    The report is spot on for me also, and I welcome the 1-3 months of resolving inner conflicts. I've too been into a process of personal reflection, self-care, healing and also collecting myself. I have felt more calm, and a little less pressure and worry because I accepted where I am with myself, and I stopped bombarding myself with what I should and could do, and doing so even when I don't know what I want. I've also been purging what's not in harmony with where I am or where I'm heading, what's 'outdated' and generally what I don't like to keep. This has been going on through all of April. I'm in an ongoing process of sorting through my things, sometimes coming back for doing another 'layer'. Right now I'm sorting through papers and throwing what I can. So the focus has only been on self-care, myself and my stuff. At some point I need to do a deep deleting process on this computer also. I also really enjoy doing this kind of work. To me it's an inner process just as much as it is an outer process. I've been dealing with a flue for 2,5 week, with a horrible dry cough in the throat and a deep rumbling cough in my lungs, and on Monday I'm going to the doctor to check if I have pneumonia. I'm exausted from coughing and blowing my nose. I need to add that I've had much relief from a homeopathic remedy though. Without that I know I would have been much worse longer. It was the homeopath that suggested that it could be best to have that checked just in case. Thank you so much Troy and Michael for the report
  34. 14 points
    Ditto to everything. I talked about or explored all of this these last four days. Recently I experienced such an unfathomably and deliriously happy, creative and productive week. I have got so many personal projects moving! It was kind of funny because I was experiencing so much joy and liberation that I kind of transcended it and saw all of my other emotions and realities too. It felt like calm wholeness that reduced the joy but increased trust. Then I hit a kind of complete slow down in my body yesterday and have diffused. Going through my 4th IM though, I'm completely fine with this up and down motion of my days and no longer struggle so much against it. Confusion arises for sure, but less struggle. My main source of Delusion continues to revolve around work life. I'm doing my best on soothing myself towards baby steps, but still not enough to feel satisfied.
  35. 14 points
    Besides cleaning my home, I can definitely feel myself sorting through cording- the random urge to contact someone with whom I had broken contact (may be picking up on the yearning on their part), then a pang of regret concerning another relationship, only to have them show up in my dream that night massaging my head LOL. The relief I felt today may or may not have been the result of the end of the Convergence. All I know is that I'm grateful to be feeling better. I've been fighting against myself, but there was a break in the clouds today. I could enjoy the beautiful sunset and the smooth notes of a trumpet sounding in the distance
  36. 13 points
    The energy reports don't always resonate with me but this one did strongly. The Wholeness of Soul course has sparked a lot of introspection and re-evaluation for me, especially with regards to my marriage. So self-care, self-reflection, clarity and calm seem really good for me right now. My dreams have become more strongly symbolic and the Universe has been faithfully answering my questions. I am in a weird limbo, and I don't know what's going to happen with this relationship but i feel really strong and peaceful. Also, once I stopped being so obsessed with news and all things related to Emperor Cheetoface my mood has improved a lot. Now I listen to comedy in the car and new age woo woo podcasts while I walk my dogs.
  37. 13 points
    This is the first time I really felt I fit in with "most of our students". I have been more on and more focused on my own little world and though I follow a bit, I can barely stand to see any news these days. I feel a bit guilty but I am in such despair every time I look. Every FF bumper sticker I see feels like a Nazi just waiting to throw me in a camp or kill me. They may as well be painting a swastika on my house. I have to tap through TV shows that have the slightest suspense. But I have way less anxiety about my personal situation and my ability to care for myself which is a major win. @ConnorI wish I had someone to watch GOT with! TOGETHER WE SIT!
  38. 13 points
    My dear Troy, I'm wrapping you in this big bubble of Love, Gratitude & Healing. Can you feel it??? :'= I'm happy you're happier now, and safer and thriving again :') What a relief must be for you, after all that fear & uncertainty. Thank you so much for keeping us updated!! As for the migraines and headaches...have you tried physiotherapy or chiropractic adjustments? I tend to carry a lot of tension in neck and upper body, and I manage any symptoms with yoga, pilates and some montly visits to my physiotherapist. They give me some exercises according to my needs. I also have a playlist of easy, safe stretches I can share with you if you want Lots of love my friend!!!
  39. 13 points
    Hugs brother. Glad you have healthcare in place after what must have been a scary time.
  40. 12 points
    @NickG I had to do the same! I have a Scholar friend that I've talked about before, I finally just had to admit to myself that I wasn't enjoying the friendship and there was too much resistance, push and pull, rigidity and disagreement. I gently let her know that I wouldn't be talking on the phone with her anymore but if she wanted to text and keep up with each other on social media I would be open to that. She seemed stung and admitted she had felt no tension and thought that our disagreements were "respectful". Which, they were, but who wants to disagree, even respectfully, every single time you have a conversation with someone? I don't know if I'm being immature here or in Arrogance but I wanna laugh and be ridiculous and my shady self with my friends and not have to pivot into defending my "position" on Kim Kardashian lmfao. She's also in a Goal of Dominance, and one of her Primary Needs is Power. I am very empathetic and sensitive so I felt this tension that she was attempting to dominate me? Not in any obvious or necessarily toxic ways. But I'd make mention that I wanted to get off of the phone (she enjoys two-hour long convos on the daily) to get something done and she would swiftly change the subject, not even acknowledging what I had said. Earlier in the friendship I had told her I wanted to take a week off from our convos so I could focus on work, and she called me that night saying I should just "talk to her tonight" and then take my break. Obviously she was oblivious to all of this, and I think I really surprised her when I finally put the boundary down of absolutely no phone calls. Partially because I really can't afford to spend hours at a time in the evening when I'm my most awake/productive/free to talk with her. Especially if said conversations literally always have some moment of tense disagreement. She apologized and wanted to fix it and talk more, but I was and am totally done with it. Maybe we'll reconnect in the future but if not, it's all good.
  41. 12 points
    Btw, "TOGETHER WE SIT" makes me chortle.
  42. 12 points
  43. 12 points
    AYYYYEEE TURN UP!!!!!!!! YOU DESERVE IT!!!! TREAT YO' SELF!!!!!
  44. 12 points
    @Troy: You DESERVE a day, nay a week, of just playing (like a good Sage should!) and celebrating YOU and how much better you are feeling. Frolic in the metaphorical surf and smell the astral roses!
  45. 12 points
    Troy, I am glad you have been feeling better. Have a great day! Love you too!
  46. 12 points
  47. 11 points
    I was looking at an old piece of transcript and Michael reminded me that one of my on going theme of lives is "care". And I start to wonder: what's the difference between love and care? If we are talking about love=agape/unconditional acceptance, then there's a clear differences... but when I asked myself the questions: Can you love without caring? Can you care without love? My answers are no and no... It's one of those concepts that, I know there's a difference, but could not find a tangible way to describe it. Can't wait to see your take on this topic! Or if you know Michael covered this before, let me know where to find them.
  48. 11 points
    @Cong, I think what you're referring to is the Seven Rings of Love. Care could also be called Nurturing -- or any of the other concentric Rings. Love (in your description) would be Agape. It's an excellent (full) read. Here's a short excerpt. We will list the 7 Rings, then cover each in some detail. First Ring: Nurturing Second Ring: Alliance Third Ring: Reciprocity Fourth Ring: Appreciation Fifth Ring: Comprehension Sixth Ring: Altruism Seventh Ring: Agape The First Ring, NURTURING, of course, is not tremendously difficult to bring to your life or to someone else's. Even "Events" receive some amount of this Ring of Love if you experience certain repetitive patterns in your life. In other words, if you find you continue to struggle with "issues" that change form, but retain the core "lesson," you are providing some form of Nurturing for those issues; some form of Love. Love is not reserved for only Humans or Relationships, but is able to be generated for all Events you experience as a Sentient Being. When you have repetitive patterns in your life and you "wish" they were not a part of your life, it will do you well to observe in what ways you Nurture these events as a means to extract or create opportunities for expanding into wider Rings of Love or as a means to opening to receive Love. ... And finally, the Seventh Ring of Love is AGAPE, reached through Altruism. At this Ring, there is no emphasis on anything. Complete acceptance is experienced, with absolute loss of condition, meaning, reference, and definition. As the Sixth Ring developed a lack of emphasis on Events, and the Fifth Ring lost emphasis on Self, this final Ring removes ALL emphasis beyond the allowance of EXPERIENCE. Agape is PEACE. This Ring is related to the all-encompassing, boundless Higher Moving Center, or Tao. This is the Ring of realization that ALL of your life was Created by you or Allowed by you, and that not only is there nothing Wrong or Separate, but that EVERYTHING IS PERFECT in its own way.
  49. 11 points
    Unfortunately what you mentioned and this are the only transcripts on sex. So keep asking sex questions people.... I am waiting in antici...........pation. I am so not of the opinion that a fascination on the deep dive of sexuality has anything to do with being stuck in any monad or what not. I have seen that opinion scattered throughout transcripts from students from time to time. Sex is deeply creative and healing and demands a bigger section on TLE! Haha
  50. 11 points
    I found this article in the TLE Yahoo list and it is absolutely new info to me. It is quite interesting, but not completely fleshed out. The example given helps a bit as far as the progressions, but the transmutation part is still not entirely clear to me. Does it end with Saturn as Primary Nature? Or just with Saturn having more influence on Nature while still being Primary Appearance? I think there was to be another article on Body Types that might have helped explain the concepts, but at this moment I am not sure that article ever appeared. Of course, I'll post whatever I find in the future. Anyhow, to me this content is a new source of questioning and discussion.
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