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  1. KurtisM

    Cynics in Social Situations

    [Excerpt from Ask Michael - September 6, 2015] [Kurtis] Hi Michael, I'd like to continue as with last time on how the Cynic appears/acts in social situations. MEntity: The Cynic shows up in social situations as the person who "does not miss a thing." The Cynic sees what others do not see, and can be difficult to navigate in social situations because they naturally "throw a wrench" into the smooth social lubrication that is in place. Depending on the overleaves of the Cynic, this person may be more open about this, or more passive-aggressive about their perspectives that challenge the presumptions of others. In the Positive Pole, the Cynic usually sees no need to emphasize attention to what others do not see unless that attention is beneficial. Contradiction does not have to be offensive or derailing of social structures. Contradiction merely points out what is missed as a means to help. However, when the Cynic goes into the Negative Pole, this emphasis on what others may have missed is rarely helpful and serves only to undermine, or Denigrate. For example, if someone is being complimented on how beautiful she is, the Cynic may notice the spinach in her teeth. Everyone else has noticed, too, but may not say anything. The Cynic will likely say something. This information about the spinach in her teeth is simply information, but the Cynic can turn that information into a means to help, or a means to hurt. Pulling her aside to inform her is helpful. Stating, "well, you would probably look more beautiful without a tree in your front teeth" would not be as helpful. It is the same information, but the Cynic must learn how to deliver that information. Another way the Cynic can fall into the Negative Pole is if there is nothing of Contradiction to actually point out. Instead of allowing for the fact that there may be no Contradictions or need for Contradictions, the Cynic might then begin to make up contradictions simply for the sake of being contrary, to denigrate. This is the Attitude who can give the backhanded compliments, and the loaded statements that are cloaked in smug evasiveness like conversation bombs waiting for someone to step into. This is one of the Attitudes who can dismiss the responsibility of communication by saying that they are simply "telling it like it is," or "just telling the truth." When a person must qualify his or her social relationships with dismissive statements such as these, they are more often than not very clear about just how manipulative or irresponsible it is, and wrapping it in "bluntness" and "truth" seems to justify the lack of responsibility.
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