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OMW - Jan 15, 2011 - Doing Vs Being Channeled by Troy Tolley Michael: Hello to each of you. We are here. We will share what we can in the context of "Doing Vs Being" as Troy has titled this exchange. The emphasis in this exchange will be on your Centering, and your Part of Centering, as well as a quick assessment of yourself and your relationship to your life, and then some solutions or tools for fulfilling your intentions. First, it is to be understood that no fragment is without all Centers. There are 7 Primary Centers, which correlate to what you may know as the 7 Chakras. There are more Chakras/Centers beyond these 7, but they are not developed enough during a Physical Incarnation to be of any practical use as a tool, though they are used and active. Those Centers/Chakras beyond the 7 come into more relevant play in Higher Planes. Though Chakra and Center are interchangeable terms for the most part, we will point out that CENTER is very different in meaning than CHAKRA. A Chakra describes the vortex of energy that acts as a kind of medium, gateway, or filter for certain energies. A Center describes your "Center of Gravity," or how your particular Personality has learned to function, be balanced, and navigate through a lifetime. The correlations between Centers and Chakras and the Overleaves can get confusing for some students, but there is a consistent correlation that we will not have to get into today. As the soul ages, the emphasis over the lifetimes moves from Doing to Being. This is not an easy experience to have while in a Young-Mature World. What tends to happen for the older soul in this paradigm is an internal conflict between that Being and Doing. The internal conflict is a begrudging attitude toward the demands of DOING, while walling up, protecting, and nurturing a rather fragile and unstable sense of BEING. [Brian_W] Michael, could you briefly describe your definitions for "Being" and "Doing" to ensure we are all on the same page? Michael: Yes, we will define BEING as a state of self-acceptance, and DOING as the action that manifests/represents BEING. For many of you, there can often be a disconnect between those two qualities so that you are DOING and BEING in very separate or managed dimensions. There are four Qualities of State that every fragment must exist within while on any Plane: DOING, BEING, HAVING, and KNOWING. These correspond to the Axes. Though the focus here is between Being and Doing, we will bring Having and Knowing into the equations that we may share for insight. Before the Old Soul cycles off, it will have found a way to bring resolution to the division between Doing and Being, regardless of any environment, imprinting, society, etc. That resolution can only come from the Integrity that develops between Doing and Being. When that resolution comes, there is very little difference between Doing and Being. The first step, then, is developing the Integrity, which is simply another word for developing Honesty, or bringing in The Truth as the bridge between those two states. Two additional developments MUST be brought into the equation for bridging two Qualities of State at some point: LOVE, and BEAUTY/Energy. In other words, every Quality of State will eventually find union/bridging through Truth, Love, and Energy. And put another way: it is only through the development of Truth, Love, Energy that one can bring Integrity, Pleasure, and Harmony to what one IS, what one HAS, what one DOES, and what one KNOWS. Until there is conscious development of those building blocks of your universe, applied to the building blocks of YOU, those Qualities of State are usually imbalanced, with one or two over-emphasized while one or more neglected. Though each building block is always in effect, it will almost always be through TRUTH that one gets started. In this case of Doing VS Being, then, the first step would be in assessing with as much honesty as possible just how closely those two states are in your life. Is what you DO representative of what you ARE? Is what you ARE nurtured by what you DO? For most of our students, we would say that approximately 25% of the life that is ACTION/DOING actually represents BEING, and that the sense of BEING is starving, so to speak, because the DOING is not nurturing/feeding BEING. This does NOT mean that because you work in a factory and are an Old Soul, then you are not representing your Old Soulness, or that your interest in the latest fashion does nothing for your Old Soulness. This does NOT mean that because you meditate every morning, do yoga at night, and smile pleasantly with pretty thoughts all day that you are honestly representing your Old Soulness, either. So the key here is not in WHAT you Do, but HOW and WHY you Do. The WHAT of your Doing is inherent in the Doing, but the HOW and WHY is the color and meaning of the What. We realize we are throwing out various familiar terms in correspondences that may be confusing, so we will share that now, so you can copy it, and refer to it as we continue: BEING = Inspirational Axis = Emotional Centering = WHO DOING = Action Axis = Moving Center = WHAT HAVING = Expression Axis = Intellectual Center = HOW KNOWING = Assimilative = Neutral/Instinctive Center = WHY One does not have to be DOING the obvious or the cliche as a means to represent BEING, or to have Integrity between the two. The key is in the Honesty between the Being and Doing, which means how much of YOU is there in what you DO. Because YOU are a spectrum, or because your Being is a spectrum, "YOU" will always be in what you DO, so the question must be even more specific: how much of the True You, True Personality, is in what you DO. Here is where things get interesting. Because YOU are in everything you DO, and because the universe is built from Truth, Love, Energy, it is impossible for your Actions to betray your Being. This is not to say that your Actions represent your True Being, but that they ALWAYS represent your Being. In some way. Everything you DO is to serve BEING. This means that even the most begrudging, routine, tedious, and terrifying tasks that you take on are somehow representing some part of your Being. So the process of bringing Integrity to bridge your Being and Doing is the process of examining exactly how what you are DOING NOW represents you now, so that you know just how far you have to go in bringing resolution. The way to do this is to ask yourself: HOW and WHY DO I DO WHAT I DO? This question can be contextualized so that you ask this in the various contexts of your life. HOW do I do my job? WHY do I do my job? HOW do I manage this relationship? WHY am I in this relationship? Or to keep the wording consistent: HOW do I do this relationship? Why do I do this relationship? This questioning can extend into areas that seem to lack Doing, as well: HOW do I NOT do a relationship? WHY do I NOT do a relationship? Asking the HOW and the WHY of your DOING gives you feedback as to where you are with yourself, and thus gives you some indication as to your current sense of BEING. To start this line of questioning, we would suggest looking at the most problematic and the most pleasant ends of your life. Before we move on, we will open the floor to discussion about what we have shared so far, starting with a question to each of you about how his line of questioning might work for you. There is no need for a queue. *****FLOOR OPEN****** [Geraldine] I'm in a fairly content and balanced state right now -- my doing is in balance with my being to a large extent -- I was much more chaotic when younger. I feel that I'm comfortable in my Old Soul late years post-5th IM. Michael: GERALDINE- we would agree with your assessment. The areas where your Doing and Being remain incongruent are specific to when your Doing is Reactionary, rather than Responsive. One way of understanding DOING as a spectrum can be through polarities of RESPONSE/ACTION vs IRRESPONSIBLE/REACTION. [Brian_W] Michael, I wanted to ask questions on how do I study for my important exam, how do I get into a relationship with a young woman that has recently caught my attention, why am I too generous with time and money, but I think the root of it comes down to: "Why don't I have sustained self-confidence in myself and my abilities?" [Brian_W] Instead of asking "how can I piece my family back together," perhaps I should be asking "why do I feel it is my personal responsibility to piece my family back together, when it seems the others only want to fight" Michael: BRIAN - asking the specific questions of DOING when asking your question will help bring some clarity. For instance: "HOW do I help heal my family?" and "WHY do I help heal my family?" This would help reveal insights that can help you then to make decisions reflective of your True Being. [Brian_W] and for my upcoming exam? Michael: Start with the question that might reveal the most insight. In this, it might be the WHY. [Brian_W] why do I procrastinate and allow myself to become distracted... Michael: Brian, we will suggest the means for your own lines of questioning, using an example, but it would be your responsibility to continue that questioning into other areas. If our example is not clear, we will help to clarify, but we cannot and will not do the extended work, of course. [Brian_W] ok [Diane_H] Brian, the bigger question might be: "why are you taking this class?" Michael: Asking yourself "HOW do I study for an upcoming exam?" and "WHY do I study for an upcoming exam?" can shed light on the Integrity there may be, not be, between your Doing and Being. And then you would recalibrate your choices and actions from there. Your first line of questioning would be in the questioning of the HOW and WHY of NOW. [Brian_W] Diane, that one I believe at least began with what Michael has referred to as "the search," and I will have to ask for later clarification on that, as it is true, but I often feel like I'm trying to search for an unknown object in the dark. I know it exists, but nothing else of it Michael: BACK TO BRIAN - the rest of your questions can be addressed in the same way: HOW do I get into a relationship with a woman? WHY do I get into a relationship with a woman? Both being asked in the context of NOW. [Brian_W] Could you explain what you mean by "the context of NOW?" Michael: This would reveal your motivations and your methods, so that you may then alter them to be more reflective of your True Being. "The context of NOW" would be literal. NOW. [Brian_W] oh, okay Michael: In the case of your seeking a relationship to a woman that you do not already have a relationship with, you would be asking of your NOW in the sense of your what your experiences have been up to NOW. HOW do I get into a relationship with a woman is asked not as an instructional question, but as an assessment. As in: how have I got into relationships, up to now? Why have I got into relationships, up to now? Or to keep the wording consistent: how do I get into relationships, up to now? etc. HOW and WHY do I get into relationships? [Brian_W] the HOW is a very good question, the WHY, ... thankfully the answer to that is starting to shift Michael: Let this first line of questioning be revealing and insightful before the more instructional questioning. [Brian_W] ok, thank you Michael Michael: In your case, it might be that the HOW and the WHY might be answered as "HOW I do relationships is eagerly," and "WHY I do relationships is because I want to feel special, loved, and important." Of course, you may have your own responses, but if these were your responses, then you would want to ask if those are honestly reflective of your BEING. The honesty here is VITAL. We cannot emphasize this enough. [Brian_W] Does it all tie back into my self-dep and self-confidence issues? It seems to be the one thing that I am hearing almost screaming into my ears on this one Michael: And by honesty here, we mean that if the answer is YES to the question, then that is not a bad or wrong answer, even if you wish it were not true. If the answer is "YES, I own the fact that my Being right now is eager to be loved, wanted, special, and important to someone, anyone," then that is far more Integrity than the denying of that. And this is key. For every one of you. By HONEST, by INTEGRITY, we do not mean wishful thinking, or idealizing your responses. In this case for you, Brian, if the honest answer were yes to the question of integrity, then you have brought yourself to a state of self-acceptance that transforms your BEING toward a wholeness that would never come from your denying your current state of being. That Integrity then carries forth into your Doing, and the very act of your accepting those current qualities in the self helps to alleviate your emphasis on someone else having to do that work of accepting you, because you now have the foundation. We think we have responded enough to help bring some insight to the questions you may ask of yourself, and will move on to respond to others. [Brian_W] thank you [Diane_H] I ask myself "why" all the time about the big picture stuff (like why do I want to have a healing practice), but when I look at it, there are many smaller things I do in fear mode. And the "how" of what I'm doing seems to be more confused than anything else. I waver between expressing and hiding. Michael: DIANE - we would say that the fearful undertones to some of your actions within your fulfilling more of your Being are because of some of the lesser-beautiful motivations that you have not fully embraced. And this goes back to what we just shared with Brian: that your answers do not have to be beautiful, noble, or glamorous; they need only be honest. "WHY do I have a healing practice" might actually include the response, "because I am more important than I was led to believe I am, and I want to share that importance in a way that proves it." We SUGGEST our responses to prompt your own, but we are not doing the work for any of you. We say this so that you do not presume we are reading something concrete to you. These are merely suggestions; relevant, but not conclusive. [Diane_H] Wow, ok [Diane_H] I was thinking of embracing the fact that I want to be self-sufficient, ie. make money doing it. Michael: What happens when one does not include the lesser-beautiful aspects of honesty is that those remain like cracks in the foundation of our fulfillments. They will constantly need tending, covering, repair, and monitoring, and this can be exhausting. [Diane_H] I hear ya Michael: Yes, Diane, and the lesser-beautiful parts of your honesty in the WHY can help in securing the HOW. For instance, if one wants to use one's healing skills as a means of self-sufficiency, but one has not embraced the lesser-beautiful motivations behind the intention, then that degree of instability is built into the foundation of fulfillment. So the foundation of fulfillment, or the DOING, will be reflective of the BEING AS IT IS. [Diane_H] Way to poke holes in my Arrogance, I like it. Michael: Keep in mind that the lesser-beautiful is alongside the beautiful. To embrace either to the exclusion of the other would be to build upon shaky foundations. So to return to DIANE specifically, it is not that your only motivation is of lesser-beauty, but that it is fair and honest to own every part of your motivation. [Diane_H] So is it accurate to say that whatever we'd like to do, accepting our "higher" or "lower" intentions is the key to fulfillment, and doing it regardless of what imprinting, society, outside forces say otherwise? Michael: Diane, you have just described the difference between True Peace, and True Defense. If your life is motivated by "in spite of," or "despite," or "regardless of," etc, then your motivation is laced with defense. However, the key to the peace is in allowing that, letting that simply be a part of the equation, not something to rise above and escape or make up for. [Diane_H] Ah, ok Michael: TO ALL OF YOU: In short, NO PERSONALITY or ESSENCE has completely noble reasons for what to DO. EVER. [AnnH] lol!! [Diane_H] :) [Martha3] for sure! [Brian_W] hehe, ah, blind idealism for the fail [AnnH] (this realist has always suspected that) [Martha3] I know that is true for me [Geraldine] Well, I know we have "what's in it for me" beneath everything -- didn't realize Essence was similar :) Michael: By "noble," we mean that there is no such thing as selflessness, sacrifice, or any other of the positive poles of the Chief Features, which are held as indicators that one is somehow "higher" in intentions. We can say this because, as we have said in many instances regarding the nature of "higher" and "positive," that the higher or more positive the pole or intention, the greater its capacity for including the lower and negative. [Diane_H] Interesting Michael: The lower or more negative, the more investment in exclusive, conclusive, and/or elusive. Higher is a sphere, where as Lower is a bowl. [Martha3] I like that, good image for understanding Michael: If you can see positive/higher, and lower/negative in those terms, it can help you to see how the movement through life is either a constant emphasis on the fear not to spill what one has put in the bowl, or the confidence in the embrace of whatever is collected and homogenized in the sphere. [Geraldine] Life is a blender [Maureen] :) [Maureen] ribitt [AnnH] This is ringing a lot of bells! [Martha3] yep Michael: Even the Transcendental and Infinite in your history found their way toward representing their Entity or Tao by embracing the totality of their Being and Doing, and building upon that, not in spite of, because of, regardless of, or despite. The one who is referred to as Buddha built upon his ignorance and naivety, his sheltered and privileged life, using it as a means of contrast and choice, rather than as a showcase for shame and guilt as fuel. So, Diane, if you look to the darker motivations of your intent for providing healing, you would find more room for light in your progress, if you will. [Diane_H] Got it, thank you. Michael: This would resolve your divide between expressing and hiding, because you will not have shame or pride to hide. [AnnH] I am content with my finances and security. My intent is to finish my novel this year, but where I have conflict is WHY I do do (I think). I'm conflicted between doing because I choose to and for my job. Being judged. Also problems with the HOW. (I am also content with how I'm approaching losing weight) Michael: ANN - we think that you have gained insight from the responses to others, but we can say some things to you directly regarding your comments. First, the HOW of your writing your novel is not a mystery: you simply must DO it. It is the WHY that holds you back. Asking the question of WHY in the Now, even if speculative, is insightful. "WHY do I write this novel?" may help you to not only focus the content of the novel, but give you satisfaction in the fulfillment. This WHY has many answers, and it is from those answers that you can either stand them all together, or choose one that feels the most motivating. Your WHY has answers that we can suggest as: "Because I can." or "Because I want to." or "Because it would be the most personal and meaningful representation of my doing something that is entirely for and from myself." We think there is insight in the last suggestion. [AnnH] yes Michael: For the most part, many of your WHYs of life have been answers like "because I have to," or "because I need to," or "because I'm expected to," or "just because," or any other number of responses that leave your part of the equation as the most passive part. Writing your novel would be the single, most representative DOING that reflects everything about your BEING that you know is true of you, and the most proactive, active part of an equation you may ever have felt. The fears that undermine your actions are related to the fears of what you may find out about yourself in the process, but those fears are natural and only seeking to protect you from activating an equation that contradicts every other equation that has worked "just fine" for you. [AnnH] When I read that I keep thinking, ah, finally, then I'll be left alone Michael: Ann, that is insightful: it means that part of your Integrity would include the honesty that you are motivated, in part, by the craving to escape the confines of routine and authority that does not support your Being. Or rather, your sense of True Being. Of course, it DOES already support your Being, but only a part of it. For you, Ann, you are the only reason you would not finish your novel, and you are the only reason it will be finished. This is a terrifying process of owning your life in a way that means it is ALL UP TO YOU. And however resentful of your routines you may have come to be, they reflect the part of your Being that does not mind others being available for blame and cause. [AnnH] ouch, yes Michael: Owning that, first, is the acceptance of that darker part of the Being that is there, so that you can get on with the business of being more than that. [Bobbbi3] Much of what I enjoy DOING for myself might appear to be escapist to some. And DOING for others is still rewarding after all these years. [Bobbbi3] Rephrasing: Why do I find so much pleasure in escapism (sleep, dvd's, tv, novels) and also in DOING for others? Michael: BOBBI - you have worked hard to embrace the darker aspects of your motivations and your Being over time, and the very same things that worked to fulfill your need for escapism are now the very things that fulfill your more adventurous, exploratory, and curious self that was always there. [Bobbbi3] How so? Michael: You moved through a state of honesty with the self that has brought integrity to your choices, so that now, for the most part, if you choose these "escapist" activities or non-activities, you choose them because you want to, not because you need to. [Bobbbi3] They seem to bring True Peace. Michael: There is a fine line between ESCAPISM and TRUE REST, or Healing. [Bobbbi3] And much joy! [Bobbbi3] Thank you so much! [Bobbbi3] And I have retired, after all... Michael: The only reason they were seen as "escape" in the past is because you had the impression that you should be making up for the time and space you use up by being alive, so any time time not dedicated to that was seen as guilty escape from the responsibility of proving your value to the world. [Bobbbi3] much imprinting/conditioning Michael: There came a revelation at one point, and one that is still being embraced, that you HAVE A RIGHT to BE, just as much as any other, and that there are no conditions or standards against which any person needs to prove himself or herself in order to enjoy that right. [Bobbbi3] I finally got that from your teachings! [Bobbbi3] Knowing I have a place in an entity in a cadre...I AM! Michael: The same could be said for your DOING for others. In the past, this may have been motivated by your need to make up for your being alive at all, but now it is because it just feels good. It is okay to care enough for others because you want to, not because you need to, and this has translated into even greater care for yourself along the way. [Bobbbi3] Many thanks. Michael: You have a place wherever you are, regardless of any non-physical, intangible place beyond this life. You belong where you are, because you are there. You belong where you wish to be or go, because you want to or need to. There is never a context in which one does not belong, if one is there. BELONG does not translate into SUPPOSED TO BE, however. [Bobbbi3] I see. Michael: For example, to say that a child in an abusive household belongs there does not mean he is supposed to be there. It simply means that, wherever one is, one IS. You are never alone, because YOU are there, and you belong to you before any other context, which translates into the RIGHT TO BE. There is a reason our universe is so fragmented from TAO all the way down to the various sub-personalities of Personality, and of Personalities to Essence, and Essences to Entity to Cadre to Energy Ring, etc. Because there is never a dimension beyond Tao wherein one is alone. The most-isolated fragment on the planet still has "himself," whether that be a sense of division within the self, or a sense of self and Essence. The craving for wholeness comes from that vast fragmentation, and the embrace of your dimensions, or fragments, is the process. The process of return to TAO. [Bobbbi3] Alone is the worst feeling. Michael: Alone is a natural feeling. Loneliness, however, is a distortion of Aloneness. Aloneness is a part of every fragment's evolution, however, loneliness is not necessary. To return to our simplified imagery, Aloneness is the sphere; Loneliness is the Bowl. [Bobbbi3] Right! Michael: No fragment can get to know himself without Aloneness. Aloneness is the opportunity to like yourself, care for yourself, be yourself, etc. Loneliness is the rejection of that opportunity. [Bobbbi3] I really do see that. [Bobbbi3] Now. [Bobbbi3] 8) [Martha3] My intent is to finish my screenplay, with the goal of being able to leave my corporate job, and I am concentrating on being myself as much as is feasible in a corp setting. Problem areas are in getting my teenager to handle her responsibilities without having to fight over it. She wears me out Michael: MARTHA - your comments prompt us to remind you that your intentions are greatly motivated by a fantasy solution to many problems. [Martha3] :) Michael: The fact that you know this is Good Work. [Martha3] Prince Charming isn't coming with a winning lottery ticket? Michael: What you do with what you know is important, however, so it is helpful for you to occasionally check yourself in terms of how much pressure you are putting on your creative efforts to be your "ticket out." Knowing that this is part of your motivation is healthy, but to forget that you are also doing this because it is simply what you love to do may undermine your energy and efforts. [Martha3] good point Michael: The same could be said for nearly every other demand upon your energy: you do most of it because you love. That is not the same thing as "love to do it," but because you LOVE. Your exasperating and exhausting time with your child is fair to describe as something you do not love to do, but that you do because you love. [Martha3] yes Michael: This is one of those finer examples of the lesser-beautiful and beautiful being embraced, rather than one or the other defining the DOING. Your BEING is reflected in your DOING, and the WHY of your Doing is because you LOVE, or try to love. This is often forgotten. [Martha3] not sure I completely understand what you are saying Michael: Though we see you have moments of sudden, emotional clarity that bring tears to how much you do love the ingredients of your life, even as you work hard to move them into higher ideals. As we said for each of you, your DOING either REFLECTS YOUR BEING, or your BEING is manifested in your DOING. As one grows in consciousness, the Doing moves from reflection of a part of your Being, and into manifestation of your True Being. So when we said that your Being is reflected in your Doing, we mean to point out that what you do is reflecting your Love, and knowing this is important to your then moving toward wholeness. That wholeness would be the acceptance that what you do (that you do not want to do) is reflecting your capacity to love, so that when you then do what you love, such as your screenwriting, you are fully present, instead of thinking it is only to escape what you (think you) do not want to do. [Martha3] I understand [Maureen] I think I'm 'kinda' where Geraldine is at - sort of - I have some days that are better than others - but generally I am so much better than I used to be at Doing and Being that it is hard to know what I could specifically be changed. Michael: MAUREEN, we would agree with your assessment. One of the last areas for you to let into the wholeness is the tendency toward self-consciousness, or self-monitoring. Sometimes this takes you away from the experiential and into a kind of autopiloting. A heightened awareness without a complete connection to the vehicle, much like driving from point A to point BE, but not remembering the trip. That was a typo, and not a clever pun on our part, by the way, but it works. [Maureen] :) Michael: But this is minimal, Maureen, and we mention it only for the sake of suggestion. [Maureen1] How do I move away from 'auto-pilot'? Michael: MAUREEN, by embracing it. There is no other way. By this we mean that you first know that it is happening when it is happening, and then decide from there whether it is something necessary for concern. Using the analogy of driving from point a to point b, was it really necessary to see the view along the way? Did you arrive safely? Did you tend to anything along the way that was important, such as avoiding a crash or taking the correct turns? Realizing when you are on auto-pilot is one thing, but then you can decide whether it is necessary to be present, or if it is okay to tune out to other dimensions along the way. It is not the autopilot that is the dividing factor, but the self-consciousness that might come from it. The self-consciousness can move to self-awareness when the conscious decision as to whether you want or need to be present is then made. Sometimes your presence is important and you will not want to afford a self-consciousness, and other times your presence can be fragmented into various tasks. Letting that become your choice is the step toward wholeness. [Geraldine] Inserting this for AFTER Maureen. First, I do not see a question posted by Nicholas aka baby-love. And, then as a final question, I would like to ask on behalf of Troy if there is anything you might offer him in terms of his doing versus being with regards to his underlying issues that might be causing his scheduling problems. Any comments that might help him with his intention to get on track and stay on track. Michael: GERALDINE, we think an entire session is in store for dedication to Troy's questions, and questions for Troy, so he will schedule this with you where we can then focus on the issues of interest. [Geraldine] Thank you Michael: Before we move on, what would Nicholas like to say? [baby-love] I am fairly content w/ the areas of my life right now in terms of BEING and DOING...as I am moving through my 4IM, I find that I am re-discovering my BEING and what DOINGS support my new clarity [baby-love] My intention this year is to move to San Diego...the WHY of it, is to be nearer to my ET, Viktor and the ocean:-) [baby-love] I guess I don't have a question other than what tools do you suggest can help me to continue lessening the gap between my BEING and DOING? Michael: NICHOLAS, the WHY of your intention also includes "because I deserve this." The concept of DESERVE is important here because this is another example of RIGHTS. [baby-love] and I want it! "I have a right to live wherever, with whomever, and however I choose and want." Michael: This is because so much of your life, up to the point of your dive into the 4th Internal Monad, was spent guided by SHOULDS, and now you are guided by COULDS. [baby-love] yes, indeed! [Brian_W] so its okay to admit selfishness and wanting something, as long as we keep in mind that getting it is another story? Michael: BRIAN, it is always "okay" to admit to selfishness, but we point out that while there is never an act that purely selfless, it is not always selfish. Selfish and lack of Selflessness are not the same thing. Selfish, in this context, would be a state that might include "regardless of; in spite of; despite;" etc, whereas lack of selflessness simply means that it is okay to admit that it makes you feel good, that you want it, that you gain by doing it, etc. It is "okay" to admit all of that. Admitting that your most selfless of acts actually feel good and that is why you do it, or admitting that you are partially-motivated by a kind of defiance, are all Good Work. Often, there may even be a mix. TO CONTINUE ON. And to work toward concluding our time with you: As you can see, each of you would do well to examine whether you are inclusive of both the darker and lighter, less-beautiful and beautiful, of your intentions. Some of you have emphasized the beautiful and have dismissed or did not realize the value in embracing the less-beautiful. Some of you have emphasized the less-beautiful and did not think you had a right to include the more beautiful, or the lightness of your intentions. So keeping an eye to your intentions in terms of the whole of their motivations can help you to free up energy for fulfillment of those intentions. In terms of CENTERING, your habitual Centering and PART of CENTER can give you clues as to why you have your intentions in the first place: Every Center corresponds to a BASIC RIGHT of PERSONALITY and ESSENCE. The three Lower Centers tend to be of those that an individual will develop habitual uses. Even when one uses a Higher Center, it can never be the habitual Center. The Higher Centers are not designed to be Centers of Gravity for the functions of the body and personality, but only to be *experienced* by the body and personality. Tears, Pleasure, and Laughter are physical manifestations of the Higher Centers. Imagine life lived in tears, pure pleasure, and constant laughter. In theory, this sounds delightful; in reality, that person is "crazy." Therefore, we will point to the Lower Centers as a helpful insight into your motivations. Your PRIMARY CENTERING describes the RIGHT that you most-easily SUSTAIN, which means that even without effort, you work to sustain that Right. Your PART of CENTERING describes the RIGHT that you most seek to fight for, to defend, to clarify, and this usually takes effort, or is often challenged. The Center that is least-used is one that you NEED the most, as in, you often forget that this is a Right that is missing in your life, needs attention, etc. EMOTIONAL CENTERING = your RIGHT to LOVE and BE LOVED. INTELLECTUAL CENTERING = your RIGHT to SPEAK or HEAR the TRUTH. MOVING CENTERING = your RIGHT to CHOOSE, or your RIGHT to BE FREE, to take action, or do what you want to do. Looking to your own Centering then can lend insight into your motivations, consciously or subconsciously. For instance, one who is Emotionally-Centered, Intellectual Part, might be one who naturally Loves, finds it easy to love, and accepts that she is motivated by desires to love and be loved. It is a given that this is an important part of life, a Right. The Intellectual Part would indicate that this fragment may find herself in positions where speaking up, saying the truth, sharing the truth, her truth, or being honest, is often challenged, an "issue," a Right that must often be stood up for. It would also indicate that this is an area of necessary refinement so that her truth can be heard, and not just something shouted into the world, or imposed, in contrast to some whose are hidden and unspoken. What this fragment, then, might find as a missing key, or a Right that is not practiced, and often forgotten, is the Right to Choose, to Do, to take Action, to be Free. Looking to the PART can give insight into your motivations, and looking to the neglected Centering can give insights into what key might be brought into the equation for fulfillment of your intentions. For instance, this person would forget that her secret resource is in her DOING at all. That she must DO what she wants to do, in order to practice her Right to Freedom, instead of getting caught up in the battle for only protecting her Right to Speak/Hear The Truth. Do each of you understand and find relevance to your Centering? [Maureen1] Yes :) [AnnH] Yessir. Michael: Keep in mind that these are indications of your habits, not something static, and these may change over time, or in certain contexts. [Geraldine] Yes (but I'm Emotional/Intellectual; so I got a bigger explanation) [Diane_H] yep [Bobbbi3] yes [baby-love] yep, absolutely! [Geraldine] Martha is away for a moment Michael: To conclude our little group tonight, we will synopsize: ONE) clarify your intentions TWO) own the whole of your motivations for those intentions, including the darker elements that may not seem fair or "good." They are important parts that, if ignored, may be your undoing. THREE) What you do ALWAYS reflects at least a part of your BEING, but when you choose what to do, you manifest your True Being. FOUR) Understanding the WHY and HOW of your doing can lend insight into the wholeness of your motivations, and then you can embrace that, or alter it. FIVE) Your habitual Centering, Part of Centering, and neglected Centering (or an easier terminology would be your Primary, Secondary, and Tertiary Centering) give great insight, not only into your Intentions, but into your basic motivations for every action. SIX) your Being and Doing do not have to be exclusive Quality of States, but brought into harmony to widen your playground of life. And, eventually, they will be. We know there is much more we could discuss in the context of this topic, but we think this is plenty of food for thought, or for doing, and this is a start. Good evening to each of you. We will conclude here. Goodbye.
OMW - Nov 6, 2010 - Special vs Unique Troy Tolley, Channel MEntity: Hello to each of you. We are here. We will begin sharing on the topic of focus. First we will point out that we do not have a judgment for or against your preference to be "special" or to be "unique." As with our entire teaching, we merely share the spectrum of various contexts so that you can increase your capacity to choose, if you choose to do so. To understand that you may be motivated from a longing to be "special" as opposed to a desire to share your "uniqueness" can help one to make choices that tend to be less painful, less frustrating, and less isolating. We will define SPECIAL as "being dependent upon external feedback for one's sense of identity, importance, and/or purpose." We will define UNIQUE as "that which is already truthful, loving, and beautiful about you that is independent of everything, even you." Specialness is almost always dependent upon dishonesty, conditions, and manipulation. Therein lies your first means of differentiating between your authentic, unique self and your affected, special self: are you honest, kind, and flexible as the self that is being in various contexts? If you feel you are bing honest, kind, and flexible, you are probably closer to being authentic and allowing for your uniqueness than not. That would be a simple, quick assessment that can be used in any situation. Those situations would include those with yourself, as well. We mention this because YOU are the first line of contact that is made as your Special or Unique Self, and if you are able to differentiate, it is much easier then to manage the differentiation in other contexts. The reason one might prefer to embrace Uniqueness over Specialness is because the effect of doing so is liberating, stabilizing, and comforting. It means that when you are alone, you are just as YOU as when you are with others. Uniqueness is easy to love, and when you embrace your Uniqueness, you are loved "no matter what." You are loved when alone, when with others, and even in the middle of difficulties. The love is unshakeable because it is not dependent upon anything. It simply IS. Uniqueness is easy to understand, and when you embrace your Uniqueness, you can be honest and truthful "no matter what." The truth becomes something that does not change when alone, when with others, or even in the middle of difficulties. That is because embracing Uniqueness means that you begin to align with higher truths, rather than with conflicting personal truths. Higher truths are always easier to understand because they INCLUDE the conflicting personal truths, and do not require that one be truer over another. In other words, Uniqueness loses the interest and investment in being "right," because identity is no longer tied to that as a form of validation. Uniqueness also loses the avoidance of being "wrong." This is because when you have embraced your Uniqueness, you are more capable of seeing and embracing other peoples' Uniqueness, even if they have not. Through the embrace of your own and others' Uniqueness, it allows you to take responsibility when you are legitimately "wrong," but also to see that two conflicting personal truths are not always indicative of wrong and right, but of Unique perspectives. When you are capable of embracing the Uniqueness of perspectives, you are more likely to find bridges of common ground, rather than grounds upon which to fight. You are also less likely to spend your time trying to prove yourself, or prove that you are right, but to invite others to your perspective while grasping the truth that they may never accept it. Uniqueness is also inherently beautiful, and when you embrace your Uniquenss, you not only see this in yourself, but you begin to exude this, emanate it, manifest it. This is because Uniqueness inherently nurtures confidence, and beyond any superficial standards, CONFIDENCE is one of the most beautiful characteristics of any human. The irony of embracing one's Uniqueness is that it is often met with a shift in the life patterns as they align with the truth, love, and beauty of that uniqueness, but it is also often lacking obvious feedback. If you have ever been around someone who seems honest, present, and confident, you may remember that you would rarely have brought it up to that person to compliment him or her, or to point it out. You simply experience it, bask in it, feel inspired by it, etc. This is important to know. Because it may feel disorienting to embrace your Uniqueness when it is not met with obvious feedback. Without obvious feedback, it can be easy to fall back into your wish to be Special. You may find that you actually prefer the struggle and effort to ensure your Specialness over embracing your Uniqueness, and that would be a valid choice. It is no different from your deciding to eat junk food over healthy, nutritional food. Sometimes it just feels good to do so. However, as with junk food, seeking Specialness is not "good" for you, even if it feels good. Junk foods, as with Specialness, are not things to avoid in life, but to allow as treats, for fun, or as superficial rewards that are not invested in. Again, we remind you that these terms are part of a SPECTRUM. That means you have a wide range of ratio that can be played with, and for some of you, it may be a 50/50 ratio that makes you happy, while for others it is a 20/80 or 80/20. However, including the efforts to embrace your Uniqueness at all means freeing you from the confines of the extreme of emphasis on your search for Specialness. That means you are no longer confined to 100/0 in your ratio. What you do from there is your choice. Before we move into more details, we will invite questions based on what we have shared with you so far. QUESTIONS [Maureen] When is a group Special and when is a group Unique?, eg.: Indigo Children MEntity: ALL "groups" cater to Specialness in some degree because they tend toward titles, conditions, and tend to nurture hierarchies of importance and purposes that increase dependence. Even our Michael Group ? :) MEntity: However, it will always be the individual within that group who determines his or her state of Uniqueness or Specialness, and the group then is Unique or Special relative to its members. In other words, there may be two groups under the moniker of "Indigo Children" but one is honestly encouraging of uniqueness that is not dependent upon external identification of that, while another group may insist upon its specialness and that this specialness be accepted, celebrated, respected by other groups or individuals. We will point out that nearly every group that has ever been a minority must go through a stage of PRIDE or Specialness before moving into a state of BEING, or Uniqueness. This is true of you as individuals, as well. It is true of any spectrum with a negative and positive pole. Everything must move through and from the Negative, first. There are "Michael Groups" that are entirely dependent upon Specialness as a criteria for its members, while other groups, such as the one you know as "TLE" has no specific criteria for its members. The same could be said of the "Indigo Children." The way that one can discern the extent to which a group might emphasise Specialness over Uniqueness would be the extent to which there is consistent inner conflict within that group. We speak here of actual congregations of fragments who identify themselves as being a part of a specific grouping, not necessarily of the greater label that acts as an umbrella for variations of groupings under it. [Maureen] Would that be true for couples - as well as "groups" ? MEntity: It would be true that to the extent that there is conflict within a couple is also the extent to which one or both is emphasizing Specialness over Uniqueness. We would say that nearly all conflict is rooted in the concept of Specialness. [Maureen] big AH-HA -thanks MEntity: There are four contexts within which each of you may find yourselves experiencing the spectrum between Special and Unique: SOCIAL, SUCCESS, INTIMACY, and SELF. You may find that you wish to be more Special in Social situations than you find yourself concerned with that in your personal goals and endeavors of Success. Or you may find that you long for Specialness in your more Intimate relationships than it matters to you when you are with your Self. Understanding the polarities of these contexts can help you to self-monitor, or increase self-awareness, in those contexts, from which you can then choose to indulge in Specialness or embrace Uniqueness. SOCIAL: negative pole of PERFORMANCE, positive pole of PRESENCE. In this case, you might ask, "Am I Performing myself, or am I Present?" "Performance" in this case would include your experiences of shyness or any inability to be Present in ways that allow you to express yourself. SUCCESS: negative pole of REWARD, positive pole of FULFILLMENT. In this case, are you pursuing your career, goals, experiences, projects, with the sight of a Reward as your motivation, or are you doing so because even the process is Fulfilling? INTIMACY: negative pole of STIMULATION, positive pole of RESONANCE (Affection). In this case, you might ask if you wish to be in a relationship with someone specific or otherwise simply for the Stimulation, or do you do so because you nurture Affection and Resonance We will clarify here that Stimulation is dependent upon Time, Space, and Bodies, whereas Resonance is free from those confines. Further, Stimulation is dependent upon how you FEEL, whereas Resonance is not affected by your spectrum of feelings. We include "Affection" as an alternative to Resonance because they are interchangeable, and one may register more meaningfully with you than the other. Affection is not confined to touch, but to a sense of empathy and acceptance that transcends differences, time, space, and bodies. SELF: negative pole of EGO, positive pole of ESSENCE/Soul. In this context you may ask if you are looking to satisfy your Ego in your thoughts, feelings, actions, or are you simply being, doing, and having who you are from the core of your Essence or Soul. It is true that there are some who wish only to be Special to himself or herself, and that it does not matter in other contexts. This is True of many Older Souls, actually. Depending on the context within which you find yourself longing for Specialness, and behaving in ways that depend upon Specialness, you would want to look to the Overleaf in your Personality that is ruling that area. Your SOCIAL contexts are ruled by your ATTITUDE. Your SUCCESS contexts are ruled by your GOAL. Your INTIMACY contexts are ruled by your MODE. Your SELF context is ruled by your ROLE. To the extent that you are in the negative pole of the corresponding overleaf is to the extent that you may be longing for Specialness in that context. Or Vice Versa, if you find that it is easier to see from that angle. In other words, if you find that you behave in ways that are not authentic to your expression in Social situation, it may be your Attitude that is in the negative pole. To the extent that you find your motivations to be aimed for Reward over Fulfillment may indicate the extent to which your GOAL is in the negative Pole. And so on. An aside: Fulfillment does not mean you will enjoy the process of aim toward that which is fulfilling, but that you are aware that the process is part of that Fulfillment/Success. For instance, one may wish to climb a mountain to view the world from the summit. That does not mean the climb would be easy, or even enjoyable, but it would mean that it is understood that it IS the path to the top, to the summit, to the Success. Understanding and embracing your path to Success is the difference between a path to Fulfillment vs a path to Reward. For many, the path to Success is paved by resistance, sacrifice, bitterness, unhappiness, limbo, etc., and while the end may be the same Success, it will not have the Fulfillment. What we will do now is share with you the process that you may experience in your stages toward embracing your Uniqueness. It is the same as any process, moving through 7 Stages, or Phases. We will describe this process as it relates to this specific context. The Seven Stages of Embracing Uniqueness FIRST STAGE: CURIOSITY This is a stage of self-awareness. A realization that Specialness is not all it is "cracked up to be," and that you are actually quite confused about what is special about you, if anything at all. You begin to realize that you may NOT be special, but still grasp that "something" differentiates you from others in some way. We use the term "curiosity" because it includes the possibility of confusion and feeling lost, even as you step into this unknown by choice. SECOND STAGE: DIFFERENTIATION This is a stage where everything you ARE NOT begins to stand out. You may not realize or accept who you ARE, but you do begin to understand what and who you are NOT. Many fragments can get so overwhelmed by this process, that they feel that the world, people, relationships, and even the self are out to obliterate them, and the sense of identity can become so battered that it either gives in to the craving for Specialness, or one simply gives up the search altogether. However, for those who understand this stage, consciously or subconsciously, he or she feels the sense of Uniqueness coming into clarity. THIRD STAGE: ASSURANCE This stage is not one where an individual truly understands and accepts his or her Uniqueness, but he or she KNOWS there is something Unique about himself or herself. There is a sense of trust and stability in the character and personal identity that is free from too much distraction. This is a stage that also emphasizes learning, so that while one has explored what IS NOT, one is now open to discovering who one IS. Mistakes are seen as opening other possibilities. Failures are seen as growthful opportunities. Rejection is seen as an experience, not as a permanent measurement of value. In other words, everything holds within it a sense of Assurance that inspires confidence, honesty, and acceptance. This stage can last quite some time. FOURTH STAGE: SHOCK One has not fully grasped his or her Uniqueness, yet, but has become comfortable with who one is, who one is not, and has learned to gain from experiences, rather than diminish from them. But this is far from embracing Uniqueness. Your Uniqueness is now just beneath the surface of everything. And so everything is "blown out of the water," shaken up, disrupted, shattered. Everything familiar is now upside-down, unfamiliar, gone in ways that require an entirely new paradigm to be implemented. This is SHOCK. It can come in any form. Illness, loss, revelation, and even natural disaster, etc. You are stripped of every preconception and prejudice. FIFTH STAGE: RECOVERY In this stage, the healing is done from the Shock of the Fourth Stage. It is in this Stage that your first true glimpses of Uniqueness come into view. That is because you are left with nothing more than exactly who you are as part of your healing and recovery. There is nothing more to rely upon but exactly who you are. One CANNOT heal or recover without returning to that core of Uniqueness. It is impossible. SIXTH STAGE: ACCEPTANCE There are other words we could use for this Stage, but we will use "acceptance" for now. This is an integrative stage that not only brings a sense of understanding and trust to the experiences that have led to this point, but also begins to reveal the beauty of the patterns that had to have been in place to get to it. This stage is marked by a sense of participation in the process of grasping your Uniqueness, and there is no sense of victimization or imposition. It is a sense of wholeness about the process. SEVENTH STAGE: REST This stage is not specific to a seventh position, but can be inserted at any point in the process so that experiences can be had on your own terms, and comprehended on some level. Some may insert this between each Stage, and some may do so after the Fourth, or some may never need it. And so these are the Stages of Embracing Uniqueness. We will point out that your Uniqueness is in layers, and so this is not a process that usually happens one time. When we say it is in "layers," we only mean that your Uniqueness is truly vast, and these layers are uncovered as necessary and as relative to the Personality who is Curious. Each of you have what could be described as "7 Layers" of Uniqueness, and these correspond to the Planes from which you extend. Therefore, you will always have a Physical Uniqueness, an Emotional Uniqueness, an Intellectual Uniqueness, a Memory Uniqueness, a Mental Uniqueness, a Buddhic Uniqueness, and a Messianic Uniqueness. For purposes of correspondence, we will clarify that the Messianic and Buddhic are reversed. These 7 Layers exist on every Plane for your Essence and all of your Personalities. We will elaborate upon these in another exchange with you, but the first 3 or 4 are the layers in which most Personalities tend to be concerned with Specialness or Uniqueness, and these are rather self-explanatory. [Maureen] What is the difference between Mental and Intellectual Uniqueness? MEntity: Using all of the information that we have shared today, each of you can use it to gain some perspective in where you are with your own embrace of Uniqueness, and then allow yourself the room to exist wherever you would like within the spectrum between Specialness and Uniqueness. Intellectual Uniqueness would relate to Causality, or your uniqueness in terms of understanding your existence, and the impact of your existence. Mental Uniqueness is the uniqueness that comes from the combination of your Physical, Emotional, and Intellectual uniquenesses. It could be said to be your Spiritual Uniqueness, or the whole that is greater than the sum of its parts. [Deb22] What is meant by memory uniqueness? MEntity: Memory Uniqueness is your unique relationship to experience, time, space, everything and how you interpret yourself in relation to that. It is your unique means of recording, retrieving, and interpreting. [Deb22] An example, please! MEntity: We share with you these "layers," but they are ultimately one uniqueness when combined. Understanding them in layers, however, can help you to understand your processes of discovery and embrace, because it can often feel as if you are "done," and then you discover and embrace even more. An example for Memory Uniqueness is right here in this very chat. Each of you will keep with you what is important to you, remember what is useful to you, and then interpret and use it in a way that works for you. Some of you may be confused, and others wishing for more, and others feeling content with these first tools of exploration. That is up to you. And your Uniqueness. [Deb22] Thanks but I was thinking of an example that would be more distant, beyond this life? MEntity: Our example could be applied to any Plane. Even we have our own way of recording, retrieving, and interpreting memory, particular as our emphasis is of study on the Akashic Records. The same could be said of each of your lifetimes and Personalities of Essence. Each will have its own Memory Uniqueness. Every fragment, personality, essence, parallel is Unique. On all 7 Layers. Some of you will not find names for your Uniqueness, and this is okay. It is not your intent to name your Uniqueness as much as it is to embrace it. And when you do, you will know you have done so. Not so much by what you can identify as that Uniqueness, but by your release of necessity for Specialness. Your Uniqueness is far more vast than one language can capture. And it exists with or without your embrace. As our time has run over, we must conclude here. Good day to each of you. Goodbye.