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OMW - Feb 5, 2011 - Loving and Being Loved (Four and 1/2 hours of live channeling) (Note: linked to two other transcripts that should be read and/or referred to; plus, I'd recommend reviewing the "Manifesting Essence" workshop transcript, AND reviewing the three articles on "Creating a Conscious Connection to Essence" on TLE in the Advanced Teachings section of the Forums.) [Geraldine] (The one thing the transcripts can't show are the long pauses) [Michael Entity] Hello to everyone. We are here. We can begin with a discussion of the requested topic of Loving and Being Loved. First, we will point out that what we will discuss today, in all of its parts and degrees and rings and facets and levels, that this discussion is focused on UNCONDITIONAL LOVE. Depending on your preference, Unconditional Love does have degrees, or circles, rings, facets, etc. It is not that each of these is greater or better in any evolutionary way, but that these describe the various CONTEXTS within which Love is experienced. For instance, the Nurturing Ring of Love between Mother and Child can be unquestioned, unshakable, and completely free of conditions, but this does not mean the Mother has Comprehensive Love or Agape for her child. Each Ring encompasses the previous Ring, if you will, and therefore Agape (the 7th Ring), for instance, will include Nurturing Love (the 1st Ring), but the emphasis will not necessarily be on the Nurturing. It simply means that Agape can more easily draw upon the Nurturing Ring of Love, but does not mean it will. We realize we are jumping around these Rings of Love, but that is only because we wish to point out the Unconditional element that will be consistent among all the ways we will discuss Love today. We will present the information more orderly from here. We also wished to point out that Love is not necessarily a linear development, despite the Degrees, Facets, Rings, etc. Once you Love, you LOVE. The rest is details. The next thing we would like to point out is that once you Love, you cannot UN-LOVE. If you can "un-love," then you did not Love. No matter how unromantic or disappointing that is to know; if you can unlove someone, you never loved that person, at least not in the terms that we are discussing Love today. Being angry or disappointed or frustrated or separating or upset or grieving are not signs that you have unloved someone. Love INCLUDES those feelings. And that is a profound key to understanding your Love for Self and Other. Love ALLOWS for everything. Hence, its Unconditional State. Loving the Self or Other does not mean bliss, though it can be blissful. It means allowing room for everything that is, was, and will be. Before we go into the dynamics of the Personality and how Loving and Being Loved works within each Lifetime, we will point out the general themes for each Role and how that pursuit of Loving and Being Loved shows up over lifetimes. Every Role has its blind spot to love, and when that blind spot finds light, that Role usually experiences a profound exposure to Love. Before describing these generalities for the Roles, we will say that every fragment, regardless of the Personality, lifetime, circumstances, etc, is ALWAYS LOVED by someone, somewhere, in some way. First, there is the Love from your own Essence that cannot be altered. Its baseline is Love, Unconditional and constant. However, it learns to Love in different ways over lifetimes until all Facets or Degrees, etc., are collected as experiences and developed strongly. But there is no lifetime that is born without at least the Nurturing Love of Essence. However, more than that Loves you. If you are animated, conscious, and living your life, you are Loved. It is one of the primary life forces that allows for Sentience. That being said, the Role does have its own blind spots to Love in terms of receiving it, despite its capacity for giving it to its own Personalities. No amount of rejection or blind spots can deter Love, for the Essence or the Personality, but it can deter the conscious experience of it, and that conscious experience of it is vital for collecting all forms of Love over lifetimes. We will describe those now: For SERVERS, the experience of Loving comes so easily that at some point over the lifetimes there is a period of time where it is blocked as much as possible so that there is a well-rounded experience of Love, and this gives insight into how to work around blockages in others. This period of blockage is cyclical and within each Level of Soul Age, so it is rather common enough that we can describe it as a pattern of significance. Servers, then, more than most Roles, tend to need PROOF OF LOVE in order to bring light to through their blind spot. Keep in mind that we are describing blind spots, and the means through which to bring light to that blind spot, but these conditions for experiencing Love does not equal a distortion of Love or a lack of Love. Love, if you will, does not mind the hoops that each of us requires of it, which we realize is a paradox or irony. In other words, the person who Loves the Server who requires Proof would not be offended by that necessity for Proof, and would allow room for that necessity. Because Servers are often so overlooked or taken for granted, this wish for Proof make go on as a silent longing, and the Server may never give voice to that craving. They may even dissuade it or dismiss the attempts. At first. But they will also know when it is true. When it is Love. And that will not be forgotten. PRIESTS, more than any other Role, tend to require being SURPRISED by Love as a means to bring light to their blind spot. Priests will often note that they are Loved, and even feel that Love, because, like all Roles, there is a default kind of Love that shows up in various ways. The Servers' is Nurturing, while the Priests' is Altruism. That Altruism is a faceless kind of Love, so the blind spot is the focusing of Love on a face, so to speak. There is nothing more profound, in terms of Love, to a Priest than to suddenly realize he or she IS Loved. By someone specific, or for a specific reason, or quality. Priests rather presume they are Loved, in general, but when that is given a face or a form, it sheds light in their blind spot. ARTISANS, more than any other Role, usually need to SEE that they are Loved as a means to bring light to their blind spot. By this we mean that they are often quite affected by displays of Love, showcasing of Love, an aesthetic means of bringing it to their attention. Artisans, despite their capacity to Create, have the most challenging time HAVING, and therefore, when Love is made tangible in some way that is beautiful to them, Love is let in. SAGES, more than any other Role, need you to TELL THEM that they are Loved, in order to bring light to their blind spot. More than any other Role, they need to hear it. You can be the most difficult and challenging person in his or her life, but if you can express a heartfelt, genuine Love into WORDS, the Sage knows that everything will be ok. Though it is important for the words to be genuine, even the most-fleeting of "I Love You's" for a Sage can often make a difference. But the more genuine, the more profound the embedding of that Love. WARRIORS, more than any other Role, tend to require you to WIN THEM OVER to Love as a means to bring light to their blind spot. This is different from "proving" Love, in that it does not require proof as much as it does endurance. Of course, that endurance is often experienced as Loyalty, and Loyalty is Love to the Warrior. KINGS, more than any other Role, tend to require you to LET THEM LOVE YOU FIRST before he or she can let you love him or her. Of course, this does not mean you cannot Love the King, but it does mean that he may not experience it until he has decided he can Love you. "Letting the King Love You First" would simply mean that you go about your business of being yourself, with no airs, no pretense, no agenda, and this gives the King time to Love you. The SCHOLAR, more than any other Role, tends to require you to LOVE THEM ANYWAY, as a means to bring light to their blind spot. Scholars, of all Roles, have the hardest time understanding and experiencing Love, and therefore can be quite obtuse to these matters. Your Love must "make sense" to them before they can experience it, and no matter what you do, say, or are can alter the process of the Scholar needing to find the equation that fits to make that sense. The more data you can provide, the better, which means this Role more than most needs to be pushed into Love, led with a strong hand and heart. We will recap briefly each of the Roles for consistency of correlations so that you can see the pattern: SERVERS - need Proof - defaults to Nurturing Love PRIESTS - need Surprises/Faces - defaults to Altruistic Love Both of these factors of need are extensions of the correlating Chief Negative Features of Self-deprecation and Arrogance, which are about Being Seen Too Closely, and Not Being Seen Close Enough. Self-deprecation is about Not Being Seen Close Enough, or Being Invisible, etc, hence the necessity for Proof that you can see that fragment. Arrogance is about being Seen Too Closely, being Too Vulnerable, but if you can expose yourself, show your face, it can help the Priest to overcome that obstacle. ARTISANS - need to SEE Love - default to Alliance Love SAGES - need to HEAR Love - default to Comprehensive Love The needs here relate to Self-Destruction and Greed, which are about Having Too Much, and Not Having Enough. It could be said, then, that the Artisan needs permission to WANT Love, while the Sage needs permission to NEED Love. Demonstrating Love for the Artisan is acceptable to the Artisan because once it is in creation, and created for him or her, it is often okay then to Want it. Telling the Sage that you Love her, and telling her often, is important to the Sage because it means that it is okay to Need that Love. Artisans can tend to "take" love if it is not offered, creating manipulative strategies to secure it without looking like she wants it, and the Sage can often come off as "needy" and resort to quiet or demonstrative tantrums in her wish for more direct and honest expressions of Love. WARRIORS - need to be Won Over - defaulting to Reciprocal Love KINGS - need you to Let Them Love - defaulting to Agape Love These needs are correlated to MARTYRDOM and IMPATIENCE, which are about Losing Control of Space, and Losing Control of Time. In other words, the Warrior needs shared "territory" to Love, and The King needs shared "time" to Love. SCHOLAR - needs to be Pushed to Love - defaulting to Appreciative Love The Scholar's needs are extensions of Stubbornness, and this means in terms of Love that there is resistance to new input, new data, new meanings, etc. The Scholar, then, needs EXPERIENCE/Experiments to Love. Before we continue, we will now open the floor to questions about what has been shared so far, and invite your validation for what we have shared regarding your Role. We know that each of these descriptions may apply because of imprinting and generalities, but there may be some sense of truth to the insights ******QUESTIONS******* [Geraldine] My validation would include -- as a sage-cast sage, I don't believe all words; I've learned to be wary of liars -- but I would say that "while the Sage needs permission to NEED Love." is a major Bingo even though both of my CFs are arrogance [Maureen] Just a thought - I can see this is spot on - but I can also see the confusion this creates 'loving' across roles [nicholas] I resonate w/ that, too G. I have often felt it was not okay to be/feel NEEDY of love...until recently:-) [Michael Entity] Yes, Maureen, we will get to that in the next part of our discussion and hope to shed light on that process. [jana_kunft] I had a sort of similar question - If I have Impatience as CF, not self destruction ("Artisany" CF), would my blind spot not come more out of that Impatience rather then out of self-destruction (an Artisan CF)? [Michael Entity] Jana, what we have described above are blind spots for the ESSENCE. This means it will be consistent across lifetimes, regardless of the Chief Negative Feature of the Personality during that lifetime. [jana_kunft] Ah I see [Michael Entity] In other words, "you" may fear losing control time (impatience) because of factors specific to experiences in this life, and this will affect your Personality's experiences related to Love, but the blind spot of Essence would affect how your Essence experiences what "you" have gathered as experiences of Love. It is not that the Essence has a Chief Negative Feature, but that the correlating Chief Feature helps describe the inherent blind spot of Essence. Think of the Chief Feature correlation as being the "Achilles' heel" of that Role, whereas the Chief Feature developed by Personality is the same for itself. Also, keep in mind that Personality is incapable of Loving. It is only Essence that can Love. The more present the Essence in the life, the more the Personality experiences Love, but it cannot do so on its own. Therefore, the Chief Negative Feature of the Personality might be said to be an obstacle to the embrace of Essence, and the inherent blind spot for Essence is an obstacle to the embrace of Love. [ClaireC] Your description of the Scholar needing to be pushed describes my experience of "going along" with situations and not knowing if this is true love. [Michael Entity] Claire, this is why we think that EXPERIENCE is the key to the Scholar eventually embracing Love. They must KNOW it is Love before they can embrace it, which means that it must make sense, or at least have meaning. The problem is when the Scholar seeks to plug the experience of Love into equations that have not made room for it. The more experience the Scholar gains, the more she begins to realize what was Love all along. More than most Roles, the Scholar tends to realize "too late" just how much she was/is Loved, but she realizes it, eventually. [ClaireC] Yes, I get it. Thank you. [Michael Entity] Yes, Jana. Another question? [jana_kunft] Would not loving someone for a specific reason or quality (as you have mentioned in connection with Priests), be loving them conditionally? [Michael Entity] Jana, first we need to clarify that some of our wording in the sharing above is in need of correction. For instance, "The King needs time to BE Loved." Not "to love." All of what we shared above is about the reception of Love by a Role. Next, what we have shared so far is a matter of language, so to speak. [jana_kunft] I realise language can be confusing, I meant, I am sometimes not clear about the distinction between, conditional, unconditional, romantic fantasy etc. But I realise this may be a hefty subject to get into and was to a large part also answered elsewhere [Michael Entity] If one were to say "I LOVE YOU" in Cantonese to someone who can only speak and understand Italian, or vice versa, it would not mean that the Cantonese person does not love, and it would not mean that the Italian is rejecting that Love, but to learn how to say it a language that can be heard bridges the gap, or the "blind spot." [jana_kunft] oh i see what you meant by language now [Michael Entity] In fact, it could be said that "blind spot" or "language of love" are interchangeable concepts that can help one to understand what we are sharing here so far. Therefore, the "Language of Love" for the Sage, for instance, is vocal expression. For the Artisan, it could be said to be Presentation. For the King, it is Time; for the Warrior, Space or Territory. For the Scholar, it is Experience; for the Server it is Proof; for the Priest it is Surprise/Faces, standing out. More specific to the Sages, it might be more accurate to say "reassurances." [Geraldine] But, Michael, all of those words words words are coming from other Personalities who cannot love [nicholas] but Geraldine, I think that no matter the words, when essence is manifesting, the love can be felt... [jana_kunft] so what you gave us is like a inter-Role dictionary of Love [Michael Entity] Geraldine, that is where your own Personality's developing capacity for discernment comes in. Regardless of that capacity, your Essence will know when it is Love, even if it is outwardly rejected or downplayed by your Personality. And Nicholas is correct: the experience of Love by Personality is to the extent that Personality has embraced/manifested Essence. Personality can reject and deny Love its entire life, and still have a reservoir of Love waiting for it after the life, which was collected by Essence along the way, with or without the Personality realizing it. Part of the 7th Internal Monad, actually, is the process of integrating all of the Love that was not integrated during the lifetime. Yes, Jana, it could be said to be a reference, at least, for how one Role might Love another Role, if one so chooses to do so. [Tim_W] Experiencing unconditional love through Essence; would that be similar to the compassion one feels when channeling/attempting to channel a higher Entity? [Michael Entity] At least one Circle of Love (level, degree,...) must be sustained during any valid Channeling of a fragment, an Entity or even the manifestation of Essence. For the most part, the default Circle of Love tends to be the foundation for any individual Channeling or Manifesting Essence. [Tim_W] oh ok. I understand. However much I'm manifesting would be the most I'm able to feel. [Michael Entity] For instance, our Artisan Channels tend toward ALLIANCE as their foundation for our working through them. There is often a necessity to create a state of unconditional alliance in place for the students who work with our Artisans. For our Sage channels, the tendency is toward a foundation of COMPREHENSION for our work through them. [Tim_W] oh i (actually) see now. [Tim_W] That's great information! Thank you [Michael Entity] For Sages, a state of Unconditional Truth is necessary to be in place for those students who work with us through them. This means, they have to "be themselves" more than our other channels, and have an outlet for that, and usually generate a profound awareness that no truth is meant to be personal or offensive, but simply a stepping stone toward even greater truths. [Martha] sounds like a certain channel we know [Michael Entity] Yes, that was an easy one to get through Troy. [nicholas] Do these rings of love represent forces or frequencies of love? And, in terms of healing, does each default ring for each essence role tend to be the type of love offered to another for healing? [Michael Entity] We like to see Love as having concentric rings, or spheres within spheres, much like the Planes are arranged, so that each context includes the previous. However, though it may seem to be a progressive description, it is not. It is more a description of INCLUSIONS than steps or levels. Many fragments do tend to move through the Rings in a progression, but that is only in terms of realization, not experience. For instance, you may experience Comprehensive Love but still have to realize the Nurturing Love within that, which leads to a realization of Alliance, which leads to a realization of Reciprocity, and so on. Think of the parent who may love her child Comprehensively, but the child only realizes he is Nurtured Unconditionally. Over time, that child may grow to realize that he is also Loved for exactly who he is and wants to be (comprehension), not just Loved as a way to be kept alive. In terms of Healing, yes. The default capacity for Love tends to be the means by which a fragment will focus that healing. For instance, the Sage tends to share the truth (comprehension) as a means for healing, whereas the Priest might focus on Altruism, which is just another way of saying "empathy." Or "compassion." Of course, no fragment is locked into its Role's default, but if there were no inherent defaults, the stable force of Love would not exist. [Diane] In general, please, what are the inclusions when a new parent has a realization that their parents did actually love them? [Michael Entity] That experience, Diane, is often AGAPE, itself. It is the total loss of conditions on any level, and the complete realization of all of the Circles of Love that encompassed your own development. This does not mean "forgiveness" or that anger and resentment fade instantly, but Agape allows room for those, while still holding the realization of Love. "I can still be angry at you for certain things, but I can also know that you were doing your best to love me." We have already shared a great deal of information about the 7 Circles/Spheres of Love, so we would suggest Troy or Geraldine link to that work in this transcript. [Geraldine] I've found it and will include it in the transcript [Michael Entity] To continue with the elaboration on the non-linear aspects of Love: While each context is inclusive of the previous context/s, Love can be "entered" or shared from any context. So while the default may be Reciprocity, one can build from there, or emphasize from there. To build would be to go beyond Reciprocity, and to emphasize would be to bring forth those contexts within Reciprocity. What we have described so far is related to LOVE, which is technically a capacity known only to Essence. The Personality can Experience and Realize Love, but it cannot Love. This is not a handicap or bad news. No more than it would be to say that your car cannot drive itself. This does not diminish the Personality any more than it would diminish the importance of the car for your needing it to get to where you want to go. [Martha] I don't think I understand the distinction between knowing and experiencing love [Michael Entity] While Essence defaults to a certain context of Love, it cannot learn to Love without you. We will respond to Martha, before elaborating. Did you mean "experiencing" vs "realizing"? [Martha] it feels to me like "I" know love [Martha] as a personality [Martha] so I don't quite get what you mean [Martha] vs only an Essence knowing love [nicholas] to me it means that personality can experience love...but essence is the only "thing" that can love, resonate, complete a circuit with, etc... [Michael Entity] We do not think we said that only Essence can know Love. We said that the Personality can Experience and Realize Love, but it cannot Love. [jana_kunft] yeah i think the confusion comes from you saying that is [Martha] do you mean the personality cannot generate love, only an essence can [jana_kunft] loving is a capability only known to Essence [Martha] and if we feel it, we've opened to the love [Diane] the love you are feeling is your connection to essence [nicholas] ...because essence IS love... [Michael Entity] For many of our students, the blur between Essence and Personality is so great that our differentiation is confusing. [Tim_W] The personality wouldn't be capable of loving without essence [Michael Entity] The Personality is the vehicle for the expression, exchange, and experience of Love, but it is not the source of it. In the same way that a car is a vehicle for your socializing, tasking, and adventures, but is not the source of them. Your Essence MUST be present for the Personality to express, exchange, and experience Love. Just as you MUST be present for your car to get to social engagements, tasks, and adventures. [Geraldine] So, we could say that certain behavioral illnesses such as sociopathy or psychopathy are caused by those people failing to manifest Essence? [Michael Entity] The only problem with this metaphor is that, in the case of Personality and Essence, the Essence is in the passenger's seat. That would be fair to say in most cases, Geraldine. [jana_kunft] oh right - the Personality can make decisions, unlike a car [Michael Entity] Though we would not use the word "failing." Essence never imposes, Jana. It is passive unless invited into the equation (manifested). Martha, when we differentiate between the Essence and Personality in terms of capacity for Loving, we do so in technical terms, but for those in a body, with a Personality, who are Manifesting Essence, these technicalities would seem moot. What we will share next may help you understand the technical differences. Each of your Personalities come equipped with tendencies that are described by Overleaves. Those Overleaves and their tendencies color the pursuit and receipt of experiences that are about Loving and Being Loved. The Choices and Decisions made by Personality set up the experiences and opportunities for Essence to then Love and Be Loved. The more one is manifesting Essence, then the more the Personality shares in those experiences. The paths that Personality takes toward Love are universal among Sentience: Intimate, Social, and Task Paths. Or put another way: Inspirational/Emotional Paths, Expressive/Intellectual Paths, and Action/Moving Paths. Depending on the Path that you are focused on, certain parts of your Personality/Overleaves will be ignited and ignite in others. In general, when it comes to Intimate Paths, the Modes are ignited as the means of pursuing Love. Social Paths ignite the Attitudes; and Task Paths ignite the Goal. True Love, or the Manifestation of Essence through two or more fragments, of course, ignites all of these. For the most part, when you want to grow closer to someone, you tend to Give and Receive through the Modes. You explore each others' Modes, and your Mode describes what you find as attractive about another person that you might pursue. For the most part, when you socialize, you present your Attitudes as your means of exchange. This means at new gatherings, reunions, and often in the work place, you are seeing each others' Attitudes play our more prominently than the other Overleaves. This is why politics get so involved in groups, because the Attitudes are the hub of the Personality, and most susceptible to defense/Chief Features, so gossiping, cliques, and "like-mindedness" bonding occurs. For the most part, when sharing a focus on Tasks or projects, your Goals will rise to prominence. Knowing which of your Overleaves, or which of the Overleaves of another, might be of emphasis, can help bring more consciousness to the exchanges and experiences, thus giving greater opportunities for the Personality to Realize and Experience Love. For instance, a person in Passion Mode is most attracted to the Soul Age of another fragment, because this taps into a kind of transcendence above time and space that Passion Mode tends toward. For those in Passion Mode, yesterday is not much different from tomorrow in terms of measuring time and space. However, Passion Mode often needs an anchor in time and space, and can tend to use those with whom he or she is trying to love, so those fragments become extensions of the person in Passion Mode, representing him or her. Understanding this about Passion Mode can help bring both the person in Passion Mode into an awareness of these tendencies, and the person who is in the relationship with Passion Mode, so that room is made for loving, instead of defenses or offenses. We also have an article already written through Troy about the Modes, which we suggest linking to this transcript for more exploration. Within the limited time left, we will share the sub-paths of each Path. These Paths and sub-paths are the ways in which the Personality "loves," or creates the way for Essence to actually Love. In the pursuit of Intimacy, the paths created for Essence to Love and Be Loved can be Companionship, or Fatuousness. Companionship is long-term and serious, whereas Fatuousness is short-term and whimsical. In pursuit of Socializing, the paths for Essence to Love and Be Loved can be Friendship or Infatuation. Friendship is the long-term sharing of philosophies, whereas Infatuation is the short-term acquiring of philosophies. In the pursuit of Tasks, the paths created for Essence to Love and Be Loved would be Commitment or Romance. Commitment is the long-term sharing of direction, whereas Romance is the short-term negotiation of directions. Of course, we have much more to share on this topic, and we have shared as much as we can in the extended time allotted for this group, but we think this is enough to spark new explorations of Love, Loving, and Being Loved. We will conclude here, then, and continue this discussion through Troy as he allows for us to in the exchanges of your new support group. Good evening to each of you. Goodbye.