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Troy

FEBRUARY COMMUNITY CHALLENGE: Love Yourself

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Troy

FEBRUARY 2018 COMMUNITY CHALLENGE

 

LOVE YOURSELF

 

Share each of the following:

 

1. What is the easiest thing to love about yourself? Don't be shy. No judgments here. It can be as superficial or as deep as you would like, but let it be honest. If you love more than a few things about yourself, that's great, but just list one that stands out as easy to love. Let yourself (and us) celebrate it through your words here.

 

2. What is the most challenging thing to love about yourself? Don't be too proud. No judgments here. It can be as superficial or as deep as you would like, but let it be honest. If you are challenged to love more than a few things, choose only one that you are ready and willing to love more.

 

RULES:  We can't stop with just listing your most lovable or challenging parts of ourselves. Commit to February being a month where you celebrate more openly what is easy to love about yourself and be willing to hold that more challenging part of you alongside in that love. You don't have to work on it, or make sense of it or dig deep into it. Just hold these parts of you together and let them share in the love

 

FORMAT: format your post like this...

 

EASY TO LOVE: describe here

CHALLENGING TO LOVE: describe here

 

MY COMMENTS: What do you think about these?

 

WINNER:  All participants will be entered into the monthly random drawing for a free 30-minute session!

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Sam K

EASY TO LOVE:  My loyalty to those that I've forged a connection with.  Being an introvert, I'm not always the best at keeping in touch, but if I've made a connection with someone at any point, I'm at their disposal, whether we last spoke ten years ago or yesterday.

HARD TO LOVE: My skin.  Too pale, sweats an annoying amount, KP on my back.  I suppose I should be grateful I don't have acne on top of everything else, though a casual observer probably wouldn't be able to tell the KP apart from acne anyway (and I'm careful to avoid observers).

 

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H2nna

EASY TO LOVE: I'm brave and experimental, in a soft artisan way.

CHALLENGING TO LOVE: There are bodyparts that I'm not going to list here.

Edited by H2nna
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Lila

EASY TO LOVE: Essence.

HARD TO LOVE: My body after giving birth. I was quite happy with it before that.

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Luciana Flora

EASY TO LOVE: I'm a very dedicated person when I want to do something. For example, I always enjoyed studying. And even the person who went to my parents' house (at that time still living with them) to clean the house told my mother that she was going to cleanse the house of many people and never saw a person so dedicated to studies. She said that this was very rare.

 

 

HARD TO LOVE: I would say the difficult half is the question of my own insecurities .. since this seems to hinder everything in my life.

 

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Jean Hamill

EASY TO LOVE; I usually follow through on promises, I am very loyal.

HARD TO LOVE; I am an introvert and don't like to intrude in case I am being annoying.

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Uma

EASY TO LOVE: Me in the Positive Poles

CHALLENGING TO LOVE: Me in the Negative Poles

Comment: Happy to be enjoying that spectrum with TLE

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Jean Hamill

@Sam :  You surprise me Sam -pale skin? looking at your profile photo you look a lovely brown as if just back from a nice holiday in Hawaii . Take heart.

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Stickyflames

Easy to Love: 

When I am challenged , I will always always take it as an opportunity to listen and learn. Even if I get defensive at first. I give a shit about the bigger picture of this dear planet Earth and all of its inhabitants and I will always always aim to make choices that reflect that.

 

Challenging to love: Something I continue to need to nurture in myself and ask for help from others with is remembering that I am beautiful, also remembering that I am essentially a “good” person.

 

Edited by Stickyflames
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Sam K
2 hours ago, Jean Hamill said:

@Sam :  You surprise me Sam -pale skin? looking at your profile photo you look a lovely brown as if just back from a nice holiday in Hawaii . Take heart.


Oh, him?  That's Jeff Bridges.  Nah, I'm a couple dozen shades lighter than that.  Practically no melanin in my skin outside of the occasional freckle; it's really kind of astounding.  I honestly don't mind being pale in general, but a few shades darker would be nice.

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SunSand

easy to love:  the way I experience sensory input and get into experiencing things.
challenging to love: I engage in avoidant behavior and I comply with the status quo too often even though I think it is wrong. 

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Diane

 

EASY TO LOVE:  I am able to love with my whole heart and can see the innocence in others.

 

CHALLENGING TO LOVE:  When in negative poles, I have high expectations of myself and of others.

 

MY COMMENTS:  MT and TLE have helped me develop my wholeness, to love and accept myself and others as we are 'here now'.  

From Michael:  "I love because I can."

Edited by Diane
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petra
Easy to Love:  MYSELF
 
Challenging to Love:  OTHERS who don't  
 
Comment: That it eludes me, why it can be such a complicated thing to love yourself, is a gem.
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KurtisM

EASY TO LOVE: My ability to organize+create awesome structures that bring new insights, perceptions and spur productivity in me, and then ripple out to everyone else when I share them.
In other words: when I see, create and express the awesome art of things.

CHALLENGING TO LOVE: My constant fall into obsession, fixation, addiction and inertia that keeps me stuck in a loop of ideas that are never fulfilled & always results in frustration.
In other words: when I'm stuck in a pattern.

 

 

COMMENTS: I had to think about this one because I don't have much I hate about myself, but I realized that I do have a lot I resist about the shape and structure of my life.
I realize now that this dichotomy between art and stagnation is about the balance my goal of flow seeks from life- and about how extremes of total freedom and total structure/order in my lifestyle are hard for me to reconcile. 
It also relates to my life task of constantly "translating realities".
---
For instance, when I get stuck in patterns, I'm often trying to finish everything that I want to get done on my list of schedules and priorities before I start doing anything else. Then because I get fixated on one thing, I never do anything else that would get me out of that pattern & "out of the house". It's annoying.

I guess if there's anything I hate about me, it's how easy and how often I LET that happen to me. Many of my days are just this struggle between rigidly ordering my day & freeing myself from all limitations I bring in to just be/do/feel whatever.
My tertiary CF of Impatience goes haywire with this division- "is everything I want to get done being done", "is this new pattern just going to become another inert routine or can it be a beneficial structure that consistently revitalizes me", "should I just wing it and stop trying to control everything or would I risk too much loss in doing so".


My life is "ugh" and "ahh" at the same time all the time. XD

Also @Troy I like that you brought up that we could use this month to bridge the divide between the most lovable and challenging parts of our life by holding them together. I wonder how I can best infuse my love of creativity with the challenge of being stuck.

Edited by KurtisM
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Gavin

EASY TO LOVE: My playfulness and easy going nature mixed with not having many boundaries, and a willingness to explore the boundaries of others for the humorous shock it can elicit.

 

HARD TO LOVE: My ability to stagnate and waste time when not driven buy the expectations of others, the work place and my own agenda of achievement.

 

COMMENTS: I am actually quite content with my ability to love and appreciate myself despite how easily I use self deprecatory humour. Even when I am allowing myself to do sweet FA while there are plenty of interesting and engaging things to be doing, I am enjoying my own company. I can love that I have many imperfections and be am happy that I know myself well enough to know what they are, and how I can work amongst them successfully.

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Connor

EASY TO LOVE: My irreverence, like making fun of my grandfather to a crowd of mourners while he lay behind me in his coffin, unable to retort. Funeral home probably sewed his lips shut, anyway, wouldn't want his mouth suddenly dropping open in the middle of the eulogy, now, would we?

 

HARD TO LOVE: My intellectual 'munitions factory'. When I'm feeling bitter for whatever reason, or in defense, and I focus on grievances, and think of things that would be good ammunition in dramatic arguments with other people which will never happen.

 

COMMENTS: The irreverence is far more pleasant than the munitions factory, but both qualities are part of me, and equally useful. The combination makes for some interesting fictional characters.

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Moonfeather

EASY TO LOVE: I am gentle and kind

 

HARD TO LOVE: I struggle with speaking because I often speak quickly and I feel I don't have interesting things to say

 

COMMENTS: This hard to speak thing has been something I have been thinking about for years now and it is often brought to the surface when I am around sages at gatherings and they so effortlessly talk and engage with those around them. I've been trying to accept that I am a quiet, introspective, introverted person and have it be truly ok. I'm not there yet, it's a constant struggle to remind myself I'm ok. I want to connect more but this issue hits me in the face when I try. I have got to get over it and the pressure I'm putting on myself to get over it is not helping. So, acceptance, acceptance, acceptance.

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Eric

EASY TO LOVE:  My generally friendly and somewhat comforting nature. It's something I've noticed with others; I'm not usually the most outgoing or spirited person, but rather seem to have a softer, pleasant presence that others sometimes seem to like.

 

CHALLENGING TO LOVE: My propensity toward anxiety/fear. Anxiety and self-deprecation together seem to be the big connector in the things I find hard to like about myself.

 

COMMENTS: The friendly nature is sort of something I'm continuing to hone. It's fairly effective at allowing me to associate with others and help others, but it can also draw others indiscriminately and be taken advantage of if I'm not careful. So I'm having to learn to temper this with wisdom when I can. The biggest block, even with that, is the anxiety, though even that I'm finding can possibly be honed. Most of the time it seems to be the root of many things I don't like about me (lack of confidence, fixations, inactivity, etc). But rarely, it seems that it could be harnessed as an energy source to action. I'm not at all good at that yet, but it's something that has occurred to me.

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AnnaD

EASY TO LOVE: I can be encouraging, and I enjoy championing things without becoming a cheerleader. I try to enable things in a constructive way.

 

CHALLENGING TO LOVE: I am working on being invested in being open and receptive, and less invested in being right, but whoa STILL many vestigial and sometimes glaringly obvious reveals of invested in being right over remaining open, discerning and adaptable. I wish it didn't matter to me so much. I would prefer to be detached and keep my wits about me rather than permanently be so focused on being right. 

 

COMMENTS: That's about it really. It is paradoxical I guess. I am a Scholar cast Scholar and without any effort at all, I can be detached in a good way about so many things, yet, when it comes to knowing, I have this end goal of being right. It gets very binary, very either/or, and reductive and frankly it is tedious. Perhaps a process of distilling information from my experiences and remaining discerning needs to be my end goal. I hate know it alls and then I see myself walking their walk ugh. But then I give myself a pep talk and it is a way out. Only half joking. 

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Gavin
15 hours ago, Connor said:

EASY TO LOVE: My irreverence,

Irreverence is ove of my favourite qualities in a human being. Irreverent humor tickles me greatly!

Cheers

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DianeHB

@Eric It was a real Aha moment for me when I found out from Nicko's session on Anxiety that people in Flow tend to be really anxious and stressed out (because we have to learn to let go - ha!). I read it at a time when my control issues were causing intense anxiety for me at my last job, and I was on the verge of quitting. I was working in a very chaotic environment with emergencies and mistakes happening all the time. This was the pivotal point of my Turning Point in 2016. When I realized my overwhelming anxiety was caused by trying to control what I couldn't, I made a conscious choice to let go every time a situation came up that I was not responsible for dealing with. That got me to back off from wanting to quit on the spot. Michael said I would've gone into Breakdown if I had quit, because of the resulting feelings of failure and anger. Another thing that has helped a great deal with anxiety is learning about the wounding behind my priority of Purpose, and addressing that wounding directly.

Edited by DianeHB
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Eric

@DianeHB - Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. Flow is freaking hard! :P I can definitely see the root of anxiety being a sense of powerlessness or inability to choose. I've noticed feelings of failure and anger popping up from it, which makes me wonder if I had a breakdown sometime in the past or if that's just another aspect to the wounding tied up in the anxiety. Probably wounding, as I had a big emotional release in January that seemed to alleviate some of that for a bit. Interestingly, it has been the times that I've been able to calm my mind and say things like, "It will be okay," and, "You have the ability to do X" or whatever that have provided some relief. It's hard to do, as the tape in my head tries to say that those words are false or will set me up for being blindsided, but saying them enough does seem to get through, even if just a little.

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Jean Hamill

@Moonfeather, your comments could be me exactly.   Hugs.

Edited by Jean Hamill
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Miizle

EASY TO LOVE: My ability to feel easily amused by life and to find humour and awe in small and random things.  

 

CHALLENGING TO LOVE: The oft-present feeling of discontentment, also manifesting as taking things for granted. This coupled with the unwillingness to really do anything about the things i find unsatisfactory, dreaming and "researching" aside.

 

COMMENTS: I can really appreciate a blade of grass, how it grows off the earth, its colour, texture, smell, interaction with other grass and the world, its cell structure its capacity for photosyntesis its godliness! And then i overlook the things my family do for me.

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Michèle

EASY TO LOVE: My generosity towards life, the universe and everything

 

CHALLENGING TO LOVE: When I am whining, petty and when arrogance checks back in 

 

COMMENTS: No comment at this time.

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