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Troy

ENERGY REPORT - May 2019

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NickF

This year has been rough so far so the Energy Shift is good news. The sentence I will try to carry in my head this month: “As you navigate May, enjoy your moments of calm and embrace your moments of power.” 

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Diane

Troy, thank you for our report.  I was just sitting here thinking about how much I appreciate you @Troy.

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KurtisM

Ditto to everything. I talked about or explored all of this these last four days.

Recently I experienced such an unfathomably and deliriously happy, creative and productive week. I have got so many personal projects moving!

It was kind of funny because I was experiencing so much joy and liberation that I kind of transcended it and saw all of my other emotions and realities too. It felt like calm wholeness that reduced the joy but increased trust.

Then I hit a kind of complete slow down in my body yesterday and have diffused.

Going through my 4th IM though, I'm completely fine with this up and down motion of my days and no longer struggle so much against it. Confusion arises for sure, but less struggle.

My main source of Delusion continues to revolve around work life. I'm doing my best on soothing myself towards baby steps, but still not enough to feel satisfied.

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KurtisM

Btw, "TOGETHER WE SIT" makes me chortle.

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Connor

That Convergence for revitalizing social connections is well-timed. Surely humanity's collective consciousness is aware that the series finale of Game of Thrones is on the 19th, and that many people will be gathering together to watch it.

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Crystal
1 hour ago, Troy said:

A shift toward calm, patience, and persistence that may prompt students to step back, pause, reconnect, realign, and focus on something that brings and shares joy.

 

I've been doing some serious "Marie Kondo'ing" of my space lately - in fact, I have a friend coming over to help tomorrow! I have a bag from Thred Up ready to fill! - and one of her catchphrases is, "does this spark joy?" And if it doesn't, out it goes! I am trying to do some spring cleaning of my environment and myself so that more room is there for joyful things and attitudes and people. (and cats, but cats ALWAYS spark joy for me)

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Stickyflames

Wow, I have had multiple moments this month where I was just like “ fuck it”

 This is very out of character for me because I scrutinize EVERYTHING and overthink EVERYTHING.

After meditation I usually get more confused because I notice my thoughts just arise and I have no control over the good ones or the ugly ones. Post meditation usually leaves me in a state of “ what’s the point if I am nothing but thoughts that I don’t even create?”. This week though I get to that place and still have no concept of “ who I AM” but I feel more like “ Fuck it, I don’t know who I am or where thoughts come from or if I have free will but I am going to live like I do anyway. Fuck it.”

I am called towards writing and deeply inspired by songwriters who just pour their humanness out there with no deep spiritual intention or grand purpose. Just this underlying ownership and knowing that their voice matters. I feel exhausted by all these years of waiting to figure myself out before I make my move. I feel exhausted by thinking what I create has to be important to anyone else.

I feel like there is such a power in just living like you matter and I am feeling this report.

Edited by Stickyflames
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Juni

  I've been having weird parallellish dreams these last two days, so glad to see them validated wrt the Energy Shift.

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NickG

Ha! I had my moment of clarifying boundaries at the end of April. Did this with an entity mate and she was not pleased in the slightest. Currently isn’t speaking to me anymore but I remember the sense of utter relief I felt when I set that boundary. I know I made the right choice for me.   So so tired all the time now lol but school’s ending so time for some R&R for a while. 

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Christian
3 hours ago, Troy said:

TOGETHER, WE STAND; TOGETHER, WE SIT

 

this made me think of this.  

 

image.png

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Heidi
3 hours ago, Troy said:

We think that most of our students are in a process of deep and personal reflection regarding their more immediate necessities and care and this is helping free up energy and power that can then be directed toward grander visions and projects.

You ever feel like Michael is talking directly to you in some of these Energy Reports? This was one for me. Like, they might've well inserted my name in some parts.

 

I ranted here already about my bout with influenza and pneumonia, so I can relate to the "deep and personal reflection" part. It felt like I underwent a big shift with that sickness which has kept since recovering. I still "want what I want" and deeply, but I've noticed a surprising decrease in obsessiveness about it - a calmness and neutrality that I haven't feel in a long time. ..and I thought that it would pass, but it's still here, so I am cautiously optimistic that this shift is here to stay.

 

In short, I've been feeling much more present, but with that, the permission to do so. I've always been so anxious and worried about the future, but it's like I've given myself permission to finally lighten the load I've been carrying. My last Platform was "Purging," and Michael said it was all about lightening that load. I think being that sick was a physical manifestation of that purging and lightening the load. It came right at the end of my Platform year. ..so I'm interested to see what this next Platform could bring. An aside,  as of May 2nd, Uranus had been  making an exact conjunction to my Midheaven (3 degrees Taurus), so I wonder if there is any correlation there.

 

Anyone else feeling this level of intensiveness with personal reflection?

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Wendy

This is the first time I really felt I fit in with "most of our students".

 

I have been more on and more focused on my own little world and though I follow a bit, I can barely stand to see any news these days.  I feel a bit guilty but I am in such despair every time I look.  Every FF bumper sticker I see feels like a Nazi just waiting to throw me in a camp or kill me.  They may as well be painting a swastika on my house.  

 

I have to tap through TV shows that have the slightest suspense.  But I have way less anxiety about my personal situation and my ability to care for myself which is a major win.

 

@ConnorI wish I had someone to watch GOT with! 

 

TOGETHER WE SIT!

 

 

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Luciana Flora
32 minutes ago, Heidi said:

You ever feel like Michael is talking directly to you in some of these Energy Reports? This was one for me. Like, they might've well inserted my name in some parts

Actually not. And sometime I'll ask about it .. I've asked once in a ask Michael .. but I'll ask more personally ..

 

For me this is intriguing .. because it seems that I am the only one that I do not see in any moment in reports energy.

 

  And when I see myself it seems to me that it is simply because with me it was always like this ..

  How to focus on my world .. I have always focused on my world .. or being anxious .. I am always anxious .. I simply do not see in myself considerable changes from month to month ..

 

I think for some reason I focus much more on my personal world than on anything in the outside world .. but it has always been like this .. it is not something new ..

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Crystal

Another thing I decided to do was deactivate my Twitter account. Too much political Twitter was not doing my mental health any good. It did not spark joy. I may or may not start a new account just for cat pics and astrology and stuff like that  in a few months. But I felt myself getting sucked into pointless arguments with randoms because They Were Wrong And I Was Right and...not good for that stuff between my ears. (And I really don't think Twitter is doing much to help get Democrats elected one way or another anyway...)

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Ingun

The report is spot on for me also, and I welcome the 1-3 months of resolving inner conflicts. I've too been into a process of personal  reflection, self-care, healing and also collecting myself. I have felt more calm, and a little less pressure and worry because I accepted where I am with myself, and I stopped bombarding myself with what I should and could do, and doing so even when I don't know what I want.

 

I've also been purging what's not in harmony with where I am or where I'm heading, what's 'outdated' and generally what I don't like to keep. This has been going on through all of April. I'm in an ongoing process of sorting through my things, sometimes coming back for doing another 'layer'. Right now I'm sorting through papers and throwing what I can. So the focus has only been on self-care, myself and my stuff. At some point I need to do a deep deleting process on this computer also. I also really enjoy doing this kind of work. To me it's an inner process just as much as it is an outer process.

 

I've been dealing with a flue for 2,5 week, with a horrible dry cough in the throat and a deep rumbling cough in my lungs, and on Monday I'm going to the doctor to check if I have pneumonia. I'm exausted from coughing and blowing my nose. I need to add that I've had much relief from a homeopathic remedy though. Without that I know I would have been much worse longer. It was the homeopath that suggested that it could be best to have that checked just in case.

 

Thank you so much Troy and Michael for the report 💙

Edited by Ingun
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Mike Cleverly

Re: sitting down - this is what immediately came to mind. From 1989 🙂

 

 

Quote

I sing myself to sleep
A song from the darkest hour
Secrets I can't keep
In sight of the day
Swing from high to deep
Extremes of sweet and sour
Hope that God exists
I hope, I pray

 

Drawn by the undertow
My life is out of control
I believe this wave will bear my weight
So let it flow

 

Oh sit down, Oh sit down, Oh sit down
Sit down next to me
Sit down, down, down, down, down
In sympathy

 

Now I'm relieved to hear
That you've been to some far out places
It's hard to carry on
When you feel all alone

Now I've swung back down again
And it's worse than it was before
If I hadn't seen such riches
I could live with being poor

 

Oh sit down, Oh sit down, Oh sit down
Sit down next to me
Sit down, down, down, down, down
In sympathy

 

Those who feel the breath of sadness
Sit down next to me
Those who find they're touched by madness
Sit down next to me
Those who find themselves ridiculous
Sit down next to me

 

In love, in fear, in hate, in tears
In love, in fear, in hate, in tears
In love, in fear, in hate, in tears
In love, in fear, in hate

 

Down
Down

Oh sit down
Oh sit down
Oh sit down
Sit down next to me
Sit down, down, down, down, down
In sympathy

Oh sit down
Oh sit down
Oh sit down
Sit down next to me
Sit down, down, down, down, down
In sympathy

 

Down

 

Songwriters: Gavan Michael Whelan / Timothy Booth / James Glennie / Lawrence Gott

 

Edited by Mike Cleverly
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CurvyWords

@NickG I had to do the same! I have a Scholar friend that I've talked about before, I finally just had to admit to myself that I wasn't enjoying the friendship and there was too much resistance, push and pull, rigidity and disagreement. I gently let her know that I wouldn't be talking on the phone with her anymore but if she wanted to text and keep up with each other on social media I would be open to that. She seemed stung and admitted she had felt no tension and thought that our disagreements were "respectful". Which, they were, but who wants to disagree, even respectfully, every single time you have a conversation with someone? I don't know if I'm being immature here or in Arrogance but I wanna laugh and be ridiculous and my shady self with my friends and not have to pivot into defending my "position" on Kim Kardashian lmfao.

 

She's also in a Goal of Dominance, and one of her Primary Needs is Power. I am very empathetic and sensitive so I felt this tension that she was attempting to dominate me? Not in any obvious or necessarily toxic ways. But I'd make mention that I wanted to get off of the phone (she enjoys two-hour long convos on the daily) to get something done and she would swiftly change the subject, not even acknowledging what I had said. Earlier in the friendship I had told her I wanted to take a week off from our convos so I could focus on work, and she called me that night saying I should just "talk to her tonight" and then take my break.

 

Obviously she was oblivious to all of this, and I think I really surprised her when I finally put the boundary down of absolutely no phone calls. Partially because I really can't afford to spend hours at a time in the evening when I'm my most awake/productive/free to talk with her. Especially if said conversations literally always have some moment of tense disagreement. She apologized and wanted to fix it and talk more, but I was and am totally done with it. Maybe we'll reconnect in the future but if not, it's all good.

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Rosario

thank you @Troy!! 

Yes, I also saw myself clearly in this report. And today I felt relieved!! The energy shift brought me some of that grounding 😄

 

TOGETHER, WE STAND; TOGETHER, WE SIT  How synchronistic. Today I went to a holistic fair and we did a nice meditation. We literally sat and stood together at different times, moved through the space, also we looked at our partners eyes for some minutes, it was very healing and intimate  ❤️ 

 

@Ingun I hope you feel better soon! please take lots of good care!! ❤️ 

 

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Allison

The energy reports don't always resonate with me but this one did strongly. The Wholeness of Soul course has sparked a lot of introspection and re-evaluation for me, especially with regards to my marriage. So self-care, self-reflection, clarity and calm seem really good for me right now. My dreams have become more strongly symbolic and the Universe has been faithfully answering my questions. I am in a weird limbo, and I don't know what's going to happen with this relationship but i feel really strong and peaceful.

 

Also, once I stopped being so obsessed with news and all things related to Emperor Cheetoface my mood has improved a lot. Now I listen to comedy in the car and new age woo woo podcasts while I walk my dogs. 

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Moonfeather

I usually resonate to some degree with the reports, last month not so much, but yesterday the 4th I was feeling out of sorts and tired so getting the report and seeing it was a day to ground was validating.

 

Now, the 18th-21st is intriguing because those are the exact dates I will be in London, a city I lived in for 2 years and left 30 years ago. I had some of the best times of my life there, a time when I was the most social I have ever been, a time when I laughed and danced and I'm curious to see how I and the city are both different after all this time. I will be alone so I'll be able to work on some emotional stuff and think about what might be from another parallel or how I can merge some of the "me" that was then because it does feel like an entire other life and not only because it was 30 years ago. 

 

I don't feel I've "hit the wall" yet but I have over the past couple of years worked through some of the issues about how society forces us to live and my QP is all about reclamation so maybe that won't be a thing for me.

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Leela Corman

Lately I always feel like I'm experiencing the more subdued end of all of these energy reports. I don't know if that's because I live in a small town and am self-employed, or because this year I'm processing last year and that's proving to be a longer, slower process than any single month's span of time can really address. I do feel like now my life is allowing me to turn inward more, because the semester is OVER and I'm taking a big step back from teaching. I mostly am working on my unrelentingly grim, heavily death-and-trauma-focused book, which is taking a toll on me that I think might be permanent and I sort of don't care. Like fine, my Holocaust graphic novel will kill me, that's fine. A fine death. Let me croak at my drafting table right after I deliver the files to my publisher. Actually let me have a book tour so I can see all my scattered friends and be feted, and then let me croak at the drafting table.

Actually I'm really trying to get my joy back. That's a project and usually I don't get there. Something heavy is sitting in me and I want to get rid of it. Saturday the 4th I had an unexpected PTSD reaction of the sort I haven't had in a while, the kind that takes over your entire day, and that resulted in a conflict with my partner over how he responds to my PTSD. It was really unpleasant. I'm fine now. Just over here painting walking talking corpses and eating vegan cheese. @Troy thank you for this energy report and for recommending that Miyoko's cheese, that stuff is the bomb.

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CurvyWords

@Leela Corman I'm literally howling, a fine death indeed. 

 

Ugh, the whole time I read this Energy Report I kept saying "Drag me, Michael! Read me!" So much resonates. I set my New Moon intentions for Taurus the other day and I was all about activating that workhorse energy, putting my nose to the grind stone, rise and grind, grind it out, bump and grind, etc. I was so ready to shake off the shitty energy of April and dive headfirst into work, just to find out it's an empty pool of more -Otiose. 

 

I thought May was going to be about work but it's shaping up to be about my feelings and sense of self in relation to work. I'm doing some heavy lifting in my 4th IM, really probing how much of the Young Soul culture I've internalized. Things such as work being a representation of my value, how to "optimize" every minute of my day, productivity as a religion, and how to seamlessly fit into a society that prioritizes what you're capable of producing.

 

I officially launched Raise Heaven on Instagram last month (follow me @raiseheaven /shameless plug) and immediately hit a block in my creative flow. I'm really struggling when it comes to how to invoke that Young Soul packaging Michael mentioned in order to dispense my Old Soul wisdom. I'm e-mailing back and forth with an old Tumblr follower and I have no problem churning out these 1000 word emails helping her with her problems, but when I open up Word to draft a caption for my business, I'm totally blank. 

 

Good news is, I've resolved to stop fighting it. My biggest fear is that the things my family feels about me is true. If I had to guess my Family Ikon it'd be something along the lines of "The one with all the unrealized potential." I figured half the work is getting to a place where that doesn't horrify me anymore. Where, if it is true, and I manage to remain this brilliant light with a million possibilities to positively impact the world, and all I ever am is someone who shoots off funny tweets once and a while, can I still like myself? Love myself, even? Stay tuned, I guess.

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DianeHB
24 minutes ago, CurvyWords said:

I'm really struggling when it comes to how to invoke that Young Soul packaging Michael mentioned in order to dispense my Old Soul wisdom. I'm e-mailing back and forth with an old Tumblr follower and I have no problem churning out these 1000 word emails helping her with her problems, but when I open up Word to draft a caption for my business, I'm totally blank

 

Join the fucking club. LOL! Things are a bit better now, but I’m still trying to figure this one out myself. Read my blogs from mid 2017-2018 if you haven’t already — it was me working through all my obstacles to starting a business and to writing. You might find some things in there that might be helpful. Let’s talk soon! 

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