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Bobby

20160820 MMW: The Health of Your Intellectual Center

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DanielaS

Thank you all for being vulnerable and sharing your "biggest lie." This needs reading through a few times to let all the goodness sink in.

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Maxim [memorial profile]

Thank you!  How about that self talk.

 

@Maureen On reading your assessment Kenny Rogers' The Gambler started playing...."know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em, know when to walk away, know when to run."

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Maxim [memorial profile]
7 hours ago, Bobby said:

REASON is purely intellectual and cannot understand anything beyond what it already knows or finds true.

 

INSIGHT recognizes that there is more to know than what one knows.

 

Both of these polarities create a range of Self-Expression that is all about how one gives form to one's truths.

 

So the health of one's Intellectual Center is often tied to one's relationship with Truth.

 

Insight allows and invites the Truth, while Reasoning decides and defends the "truth."

 

------

 

Gotta love this.  So many discussions where one person is in reason and the other insight.  The person in reason can't imagine any other truth:)  Who me???

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Maureen
1 hour ago, Maxim said:

Thank you!  How about that self talk.

 

@Maureen On reading your assessment Kenny Rogers' The Gambler started playing...."know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em, know when to walk away, know when to run."

 

Maxim, I love the synchronicity!  Yep, life is a song ...and I want to keep singing my heart out.  :sweet_kiss:

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MichaelS
On 21 August 2016 at 3:51 AM, Maxim said:

Thank you!  How about that self talk.

 

@Maureen On reading your assessment Kenny Rogers' The Gambler started playing...."know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em, know when to walk away, know when to run."

I love that line! What a lyric, it's poetry.

Thank you all for your courage. Wonderful.

 

My biggest lie: I'm inherently bad, a worthless shit, who is depriving other good people of valuable oxygen. 

 

It makes me feel I know the Core Truth about myself and my -Reasoning validates that with an exquisite array of 'factual proof'. But I haven't been able to use +Intuition, because that would be bending the 'Truth' to make excuses. Some people are born 'bad', so 'bad' in fact, that they cannot differentiate lies from Truth. They lie all the time, but never more convincingly

than when they lie to themselves, which of course Priests are prone to do. 

 

I awake every morning in a blanket of dread and fear, thinking 'I'm really not 'worth it'. This feeling is my just desert and is a prelude to a justified, continuing misfortune. I'm a huge mistake, who shouldn't even be here. Maybe a giant metaphorical pencil eraser might help? Rub me out Dear Lord, as if I never walked and breathed upon the face of this Godforsaken planet, because I don't want any of these good people to be troubled by my halting, worthless existence. Perhaps there's a special 'hospital' for cosmic mistakes like me or, even better-a cosmic incinerator. Please let me go into that Room of Special Purpose and recycle my damaged energy-or just destroy it cos you can't polish a turd; I no longer want to exist, in thought, word or deed. I don't want to feel anymore, I don't want to 'be' anymore, I just want the peace of nothingness and the dread, fear and self-loathing to go away.

 

This is a wonderful session, thank you all. I too had a wonderful session with Michael this week and for the first time in my life I can feel love and light. It was fucking great. I own it, I did it to me. All along I was my own bad guy. ❤️

Edited by MikeS
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MichaelS

I ran out of time to edit:

Thanks to Michael, thank fuck for my beautiful family, thanks to my wonderful, beautiful Essence (she's a total babe) thanks to my Entity, thanks to my Cadre and finally...I never thought I'd ever say this...thank you for me. Together we escaped the maze. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Edited by MichaelS
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Heidi

@MikeS If it's any consolation, I really appreciate your presence here. You always bring a lot of 'levity;' something we need in these "darker" times. That lie you have about not being worthy is a big one, and one I struggle with, too. The best reminder for me is knowing that I'm worthy because I exist, and nothing more. XO

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MichaelS
5 hours ago, Heidi said:

@MikeS If it's any consolation, I really appreciate your presence here. You always bring a lot of 'levity;' something we need in these "darker" times. That lie you have about not being worthy is a big one, and one I struggle with, too. The best reminder for me is knowing that I'm worthy because I exist, and nothing more. XO

Well thank you, Heidi. That means a very great deal to me and my -Arrogance says to say hello and thanks, too. ;) ❤️

 

Edit it to say...the last bit was a joke. Just my soh. ?

Edited by MikeS
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Maureen

@MikeS Have you noticed, lately, the phrase you like so much you use it as a signature ~ "Everything has a crack, that's how the light shines through"?  It comes from the song "Anthem" by Leonard Cohen. You may find some resonance with the following. ♥♥♥

 

Leonard Cohen once explained the meaning of the song as follows:

That is the background of the whole record, I mean if you have to come up with a philosophical ground, that is “Ring the bells that still can ring.” It’s no excuse… the dismal situation.. and the future is no excuse for an abdication of your own personal responsibilities towards yourself and your job and your love. “Ring the bells that still can ring”: they’re few and far between but you can find them. “Forget your perfect offering”, that is the hang-up, that you’re gonna work this thing out. Because we confuse this idea and we’ve forgotten the central myth of our culture which is the expulsion from the garden of Eden. This situation does not admit of solution or perfection. This is not the place where you make things perfect, neither in your marriage, nor in your work, nor anything, nor your love of God, nor your love of family or country. The thing is imperfect. And worse, there is a crack in everything that you can put together, physical objects, mental objects, constructions of any kind. But that’s where the light gets in, and that’s where the resurrection is and that’s where the return, that’s where the repentance is. It is with the confrontation, with the brokenness of things.
–  from Diamonds in the Line 

 

Those great lines from the song “Anthem”. Ring the bells etc. Forget your perfect offering. There’s a crack – a crack in everything.

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Maureen

@MikeS Here is the rest of the article by Howard Jacobson and here's the LINK to his Web Page called "That's How The Light Gets In". 

 

Howard Jacobson discussed this lyric recently in the Independent:

 

Those great lines from the song “Anthem”. Ring the bells etc. Forget your perfect offering. There’s a crack – a crack in everything.

 

It’s like a reprimand to people of my temperament – life’s complainants, eroticists of disappointment, lovers only of what’s flawless and overwrought. Could he be singing this to me? You expect too much, mister. You are too unforgiving. Not everything works out, not everything is great, and not everyone must like what you like. I’ve been taught this lesson before. I remember reading an essay by the novelist Mario Vargas Llosa in which he argues for the necessity of vulgarity in serious literature. Thomas Hardy said a writer needed to be imperfectly grammatical some of the time. Mailer told an audience that not everybody wanted to ride in a Lamborghini. And now here’s Leonard Cohen saying the same thing. Forget your perfect offering. There’s a crack…

And then comes another, still more wonderful, clinching line – “That’s how the light gets in.” Savour that! At a stroke, weakness becomes strength and fault becomes virtue. I feel as though original sin has just been re-explained to me. There was no fall. We were born flawed. Flawed is how we were designed to be. Which means we don’t need redeeming after all. Light? Why go searching for light? The light already shines from us. It got in through our failings.

 

 

Leonard Cohen.jpg

 

The lyrics:

The birds they sang at the break of day
Start again I heard them say
Don’t dwell on what has passed away
or what is yet to be.

Ah the wars they will be fought again
The holy dove she will be caught again
bought and sold  and bought again
the dove is never free.

Ring the bells that still can ring
Forget your perfect offering
There is a crack in everything
That’s how the light gets in.

We asked for signs the signs were sent:
the birth betrayed the marriage spent
Yeah the widowhood of every government –
signs for all to see.

I can’t run no more with that lawless crowd
while the killers in high places say their prayers out loud.
But they’ve summoned, they’ve summoned up a thundercloud
and they’re going to hear from me.

Ring the bells that still can ring …

You can add up the parts but you won’t have the sum
You can strike up the march, there is no drum
Every heart, every heart to love will come
but like a refugee.

Ring the bells that still can ring
Forget your perfect offering
There is a crack, a crack in everything
That’s how the light gets in.

Edited by Maureen
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Erin

My biggest lie is so embarrassing and arrogant-   beauty will erase my problems.

Edited by Erin
Removing a huge unnecessary quote :)
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Stickyflames

Royce has two biggest lies : I am not beautiful and I am not successful.

basically every neurosis I have is linked to one of these two lies.

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MichaelS

@Maureen I can't thank you enough. Thank you for understanding my signature, without prompting. Thank you for your support and your special messages. You may already know how important those messages have been. Thank you for showing me that however dark is the day, Love always wins. Always. Even when we're fearfully pointing to our own, dearly beloved sky, looking for demons we created for ourselves.

Edited by MikeS
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Juni

Biggest lies:
Everyone is just pretending to care and will just leave once they really know me
Just when things are going well, something will happen to ruin it all-the universe doesn't want me to be happy or feel safe
(ridiculous on its face, once it's written out, but damned if I don't default to them every time I'm really upset about things)

 

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KurtisM

I would say my biggest lie is:
"They don't care." and by extent this leads into "Why does it matter that I even care if they don't."
I guess even more so is "I don't know how to do this."

I notice that this "they" is applicable to anyone I find myself in contact with. Any person at all that i want to have a relationship with- from a family member, to a classmate to a passing stranger. It's the fact that I don't know how to communicate myself and what I like without having to feel like the other person thinks I'm annoying, or doesn't know how to deal with me, or that I won't know how to continue a conversation/relationship that isn't begun by the other person, and I'll feel stupid or paralyzed or scared.
I mean, I deeply want to share and communicate with others, but I feel like I don't know how to sustain it.

For instance, I had a few teachers that i loved having communication and relationships with in school. That i felt listened to me. But I didn't keep up the relationship and felt like I lost them and they forgot me. All because I didn't know how to return to them.
Same with a few friendships I no longer keep in contact with, and what I fear will happen to my current friends. Not because they don't like or love me, but because I don't and won't know how to continue.

The "don't care" part also comes from my assuming that I'm sharing or pushing too much for them to be comfortable. So they'll just get tired of me and need to get away or something like that.
So yeah, more Arrogance and Stubbornness.

EDIT
I just realized my "They don't care(so why should I?)" is my defense to "I don't know how to do/continue this."
The latter is my lie. The former is what leads my behaviors.

Edited by KurtisM
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Ingun
On 8/20/2016 at 9:51 PM, Bobby said:

MEntity:
What we are about to say may take time to sink in, and the effects of this truth may take some work to sort through, but what you just named as your biggest lie is likely at the core of all of your deepest wounding. However, the fact that you can state this and know it is a lie is more phenomenal than you may realize because more than 50% and up to 100% of your healing and freedom and fulfillment lies in any direction away from that lie.

 

What happens when you carry such lies with you is that you, literally, "leak" energy.

 

You can do all you can to keep your energy vital and creative and enthusiastic, but it moves through you and directly out of you through the portals of your lies.

 

Lies are like debt.

 

You cannot keep them alive by simply carrying them, they must be paid for. Constantly.

 

This is the nature of carrying others' truths.

 

They are borrowed from them and they come at a cost.

 

There are links from these lies that feed directly to the sources of those lies and you, literally, help to feed that source.

 

In many cases that source is a matter of multiple directions to multiple sources and your energy goes directly to *all* of them.

 

There are two ways that people share energy: through fear and love.

 

When you are hooked into each other through fear, the energy moves away from you and toward something or someone else. When you are networked in love, the energy moves and allots itself among all who are in that network.

 

We do not speak of this only to point to how your own energy is drained, but also to how you may grow more and more addicted to the necessity of "feeding" by your own hooks into others through your fear.

 

You may hook into others as a way to feel better about yourself, using them for energy by condemning them, rejecting them, rendering them faceless threats, etc.

 

And so then your energy is now a mix of drained energy and energy drawn from fear.

 

You become one of the sources.

 

And you will be fed.

 

It is not as sinister as it sounds, but it is as painful.

 

And you will always have your Reasons.

 

There will always be Reasons for why you do not care. There will always be Reasons for why you do not matter. There will always be Reasons for pointlessness. There will always be Reasons you will disappoint others and yourself. There will always be Reasons that life is hopeless, cold, and empty. There will always be Reasons you cannot be helpful. There will always be Reasons you will be incompetent.

 

Those Reasons keep you from the truth.

 

Those Reasons are defending someone else's truths.

 

We will point out that these truths may be true, but they are not the truth.

 

This invites starting to do the energy work if you haven't done it before.
 

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Uma

Thanks once again @Ingun for this link. I seem to be following you around TLE a lot! and I appreciate every link you discuss. This one in particular is timely and synchronistic for what I have been thinking about and dealing with lately, and of course Michael's spotlight helps clarify everything. I particularly resonated with this:

On 8/20/2016 at 3:51 PM, Bobby said:

Lies are like debt.

 

You cannot keep them alive by simply carrying them, they must be paid for. Constantly.

 

This is the nature of carrying others' truths.

 

They are borrowed from them and they come at a cost.

 

There are links from these lies that feed directly to the sources of those lies and you, literally, help to feed that source.

 

In many cases that source is a matter of multiple directions to multiple sources and your energy goes directly to *all* of them.

 

There are two ways that people share energy: through fear and love.

 

When you are hooked into each other through fear, the energy moves away from you and toward something or someone else. When you are networked in love, the energy moves and allots itself among all who are in that network.

 

That's what is happening here on TLE, and I just want to say once more that I love you, TLE, Troy and Michael. ❤️

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Moonfeather
On 8/20/2016 at 3:51 PM, Bobby said:

You do not have to prove yourself. You need only be yourself.

OMFG, I love this!

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